One Step at a Time - January 2016

[paulywogg]

Fen,I strung some clear lights onto a fake palm tree we have in the house, great minds think alike haha

[Lizann]

Quiet afternoon here. Had a huge fight with hubs about CJ. Yup, you guessed it, I want a drink, but decided to check in here instead. He was just yelling at her about her health insurance which runs out on her birthday in about six weeks. He was berating her which just hurt me to my very core. Ugh Better get ready to go to this wake this afternoon, thanks for letting me vent. I need to stop crying.

[Choices]

Hi Liz, sorry about your fight with hubs. A drink always pops into my head when I have one of those. They are especially painful regarding a child. Cuts into the heart strings.

I miss home during the holidays and snow, but on the upside its summer here so the holiday blues kind of stay at bay. But I was thinking of some kind of decoration transition in our house for January. Our place looks so dull and boring now.

[fennel]

Fen,I strung some clear lights onto a fake palm tree we have in the house, great minds think alike haha

I agree about the great minds, LOL. It's nice to have something festive in the decor, isn't it? In my old house, I strung a few strings of those antique looking "flickering" flame lights above the seating area in the alcove of the living room...it was truly gorgeous. I guess I will leave them with J and get my own set when I get my new place.

[fennel]

Liz, good for you on checking in here instead. I'm sorry that there is fighting in the home today. Does CJ work in a place where she can get insurance benefits? She can still apply for Obama care...if she does it now, she can be covered in February. Please look into it.

As for hubs....when I was fresh out of my first marriage at 22, both my folks hounded me mercilessly to find a job with benefits. It worked! I don't approve of hubs berating CJ, however. My folks didn't berate, they just put all the cards on the table for me. Hospitals are great places to work. Even part time, one can get insurance benefits.

Maybe the two of you can work with her to come up with a solution.

[fennel]

Hi choices...I sort of wish I was in N.Z. right now!

[NoraC]

Liz - :hug: :hug: it is so hard to deal with when it's between hubby & your child. But, you know what? FANTASTIC job on you coming here instead of heading for the bottle. Huge step. Congratulations.

[NoraC]

Wow - I guess it's not that unusual to cut off your finger while cooking. No wonder I don't cook much. LOL

I like the ideas of the lights to keep things festive. We were just sitting here and now that all the Christmas stuff is down, everything looks so bare. Mom looked across the room and asked if a picture was supposed to be on that wall. Nice that she noticed. We had just had the living room painted before Mom moved in and we don't have anything back up on the walls yet. It hadn't looked so bare because of the decorations but now it sure needs something.

Pauly - really great job on realizing that you've got the blues and trying to shake it. You have been doing great on recognizing your triggers. I think we all have been doing so much better with that.

Fen - are you all set for tomorrow? What time do you start? I am so excited for you!!!!!!

[NoraC]

Choice - you have been doing so great. You sound so much better! I've been meaning to tell you that.

Rusty - I don't remember if I asked you but the gentleman that you had for new years.......you said he was on antabuse. I'm curious how you met him. Is he a long time friend? I just thought it was neat to have a special new years.

Red - how are you doing? Looked like you had a great new years. Fun.

Mama - how are you doing? Guess you are going to be so busy for the next few months. Do you have a date that you have to move yet?

Looks like we are going to get rain all next week. We need rain but now, of course, there will be flooding & slides from the burn areas. Hopefully, it won't be too bad.

Well, guess I'd better get busy. I slept in again today. I haven't been sleeping well and then just crashing about 4:00 am. I think that my nerves are getting to me. Wednesday is the day that son will turn himself in. I am not dwelling on it but it's there in the back of my mind. I think that I am just on edge. But, on a happier note....I was talking to my soon to be DIL this morning and looks like they are talking about getting married in June or July. So, we'll be planning a wedding.

[Lizann]

Yay on the wedding Nora! That's so exciting! I love weddings!
So hubby apologized on the way to the wake this afternoon. I heard him leave a message for chels too. He is frustrated. CJ has a job with benefits but they are expensive and don't cover much. She may be better off with Obama care. We are looking into it.
Fen the hospital where I work will now give special consideration to hiring family members. We are hoping something pops up for her as the benefits are great! Hubs was upset because she had not yet applied, she's really not qualified for any opening yet.
Anyway thanks for talking me off the ledge guys! Hubs and I don't usually fight and that is a trigger for me! I love you all

[Choices]

Thanks Nora, I feel SO much better. Thank heavens! I was quite lost there.. And dark. Breathing much easier now. Very grateful for that! I'm almost at 30 days again.. The cob webs always seam to clear when getting that time in. And I'm more prepared (I hope!). Going beyond that time this go! I'm glad it didn't turn into me putting off being AF again. I'm so much better off without AL. I love the title of your thread. One step at a time. It makes it easier to just go easy on myself.

How exciting about your sons news! Wedding planning can be so fun!

[NoraC]

Fen - thinking of you. Have a great day.

[Rusty]

Good Morning Everyone and Happy 2016!

My dinner party was a success...the food was delicious, everyone was in fine spirits and I had a great time. The party started at 4:00 PM and ended at 7:30 PM because I was exhausted! LOL! I got lots of compliments on my table and the rest of my holiday decorations so it made all the hard work totally worth it. I am very girly when I entertain...I use my formal china and set the table with colorful centerpieces, runners, and candles.

Nora-so sorry you aren't sleeping well...it's so awful when we're anxious and then we have to get up and go to work, AND take care of our elderly parents. Sending hugs to CA. To answer your question about the gentleman at my dinner party. He and his wife (they are in their 70s) are my neighbors. All my guests were neighbors. He is English and drinking was part of his lifestyle back in England until he came to the US over 35 years ago. He has been an alcoholic for many years. He used alcohol as a social lubricant because he is very much an introvert, but his alcoholism caught up with him and in the last 10 years or so he has had several bouts of pancreatitis caused by drinking, and neuropathy in his legs so severely that he could not stand up. He quit drinking for over a year with the help of Antabuse but missed his beer so much that he went off the AB. Finally, the doctor told him he HAD TO QUIT. So, when he comes over, he can see that I am just as lively and as much fun sober as I was when I was drinking and it gives him moral support and shows him that he doesn't need beer to have a good time. I know how he feels, though...I LOVED the taste of Chardonnay and he loves the taste of his Heineken. Nora, so sorry to hear about your son having to turn himself in on Wednesday but I am delighted about the upcoming wedding. You will be a beautiful Mother of the Groom. :-)

Choices-Welcome to our cozy and friendly little thread. Good job on racking up all those AF days!

Fenny-when do you start your new job?

Liz-:hug:Sorry about the fight with hubs about CJ but I cannot tell you how proud of you I am for not drinking and coming on here instead.:welldone:

Pauly-I love the idea of putting lights on your fake palm tree. It reminds me of the first time I went to AZ. It was in December...and there were white lights on all the palm trees...it cracked me up but it was festive and pretty.

Mama-overall, are you a lot happier in your new job? How is hubs doing?

Big hellos to everyone I missed: Dottie, Skendall, Sunshinedaisies, Red67, and lurkers and visitors...let's all have a happy AF Monday!

[ToMyHealth]

Hi ~ I follow your thread everyday so obviously enjoy it and all of you. Am a modder who plans to do 30 days AF using your One Step or One Day at a time model.

Other than drinking, I consider myself pretty healthy & active. Lift some weights, use elliptical, rowing machine, golf & bike. Lately, however, have been experiencing dehydration, dizziness that no matter how much water, Powerade I can't seem to get turned around. Hence, the extra motivation to get rid of the drinking.

Choices, can you say more about the 30 day mark and the changes you experience please? I want to know what I have to look forward to.

So a Happy New Year shoutout and this is the month I get this done, one step at a time.

TMH

[NoraC]

Hi TMH - so glad to have you join us. We will be glad to help and give you support. Sorry you haven't been feelng well. It's such a yucky feeling to be dizzy.

Off to work. Have a great day all.......