The Queen of Relapse

[hazeleyes]

Thanks Autumn and Beagle - I appreciate your support a lot!

Migraine has gone now, thank heavens. Strangely having more thoughts about drinking, seem to have lost my happy place. Maybe you need to constantly remind yourself of how the 3Ps work, but that seems like a slippery slope. I never found any of the videos inspirational, it was my own thinking that helped me understand. Isn't life so tiring sometimes...

10 days in and I am happy to be AL free and I don't want to go back, just need to review that list Mr G put up so I have some tools when the crazy thoughts come. Might be a few days or weeks of uphill climbing ahead...

[hazeleyes]

I decided to add the first 20 ideas here for easy reference. Some of them are really hard hitting, but you do whatever works in this game...H

101 Things to Keep You Clean & Sober
Use a few of these great tips in helping yourself --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Don’t underestimate your disease. Every single person does at first.

2. Take care of yourself spiritually. Be mindful of your connection to your higher power today.

3. Ignore the dismal relapse rates. You are creating your own success.

4. Make a zero tolerance policy with yourself concerning relapse. Don’t even allow your mind to go there.

5. Avoid fundamentalism, even in recovery. Rigid thinking and dogma can undermine your sobriety.

6. You are creating a life of recovery and you are responsible for ALL OF IT. Yes, others can help you. Their “help” is mere advice. It is up to you to recover.

7. Don’t confuse enthusiasm for action. Figure out what you need to do to stay sober and then do it.

8. Listen to what the relapsing addicts keep preaching. Then do the opposite.

9. Take care of your social network. Reach out to others in a meaningful way.

10. Figure out a way to help other addicts or alcoholics.

11. If you attend 12 step meetings, find one to start chairing. Consider H&I meetings (taking meetings into jails and treatment centers).

12. Use mindfulness and a heightened awareness to overcome ego. Use meditation to overcome self.

13. Practice forgiveness. Forgive all your past transgressors. Forgive yourself. You must do this to get long term relief from resentment.

14. Be aware of diminishing returns, and spread out your recovery efforts (i.e., don’t focus on just “spiritual” growth).

15. Rearrange all the furniture in your house. Anything to get through the night sometimes.

16. Clean your house from top to bottom. Same as above.

17. Go for a long walk.

18. Buy a pet and care for it.

19. Eat a gourmet meal.

20. Cook a gourmet meal.

21. Practice the arts. Paint, draw, sculpt, sing, dance. Etc.

[starty]

Thanks Autumn and Beagle - I appreciate your support a lot!

Migraine has gone now, thank heavens. Strangely having more thoughts about drinking, seem to have lost my happy place. Maybe you need to constantly remind yourself of how the 3Ps work, but that seems like a slippery slope. I never found any of the videos inspirational, it was my own thinking that helped me understand. Isn't life so tiring sometimes...

10 days in and I am happy to be AL free and I don't want to go back, just need to review that list Mr G put up so I have some tools when the crazy thoughts come. Might be a few days or weeks of uphill climbing ahead...

That happened to me too Hazel. You kind of fall off your cloud a bit. Don't worry it comes back, just keep on doing what you are doing

[hazeleyes]

Another day older and still AL free.

Making some positive changes for my future and feeling back on track again. Great to be almost two weeks...

H

[autumn]

Morning Hazel,

How you doing? It's going to be 2 weeks tomorrow! Awesome!:welldone:

I am so gald to hear that you are back on track again. It does come in waves of weirdness! Things here are really stressful, but nothing that makes me want to drink!

Are you aware of PAWS? It's something that really hit me badly. I wish I had been aware of it when I was trying to quit all those times before. Being aware of it eally helped me as I knew it was out of my control and would pass. If you are not aware of it, there are loads of threads here. Even my doctor hadn't heard of it and he too is a recovering addict!

Stick at it, you are doing amazing.

[lifechange]

I want to chime in, too, Hazel, to say that you're doing such a great job! I had lots of ups and downs the first weeks.. still do, but everything is becoming soooo much easier with time. Posting here, deep breathing, trying to stay in this very moment, not allowing myself to worry about the future or dwell on the past.. those have been my most powerful tools. Also, FORCING myself to sit through discomfort, sometimes immense discomfort when it's a craving or panic or anger or sadness, it's helped to immediately find a quiet place to sit, close my eyes, breathe deeply.. it passes. If I happen to be at work or another public place, I head to the bathroom.. this has worked for me.
Looking forward to celebrating 2 weeks with you tomorrow!!:happy2:

[autumn]

Morning Hazel,

How are you doing today? I hope your well and in a great place

Sending you hugs and hope xx

[hazeleyes]

Hello Autumn and Lifechange, and thanks heaps for checking in and cheering me on. I don't deserve your support but I love having it.

It's all good from my end. Steady as she goes, nothing negative to report, almost feels like I never was a drinker. Ha ha...probably shouldn't joke that far, but really I am doing good.

My latest way of thinking is that thoughts are like one of those Japanese restaurants where the food comes round on a conveyor belt and you choose which food you want to eat. Thoughts are exactly the same, they come round in front of you in all shapes and sizes, some good some bad, some very bad...but it is always your choice whether you pick them up or not and I choose not to pick up the bad ones. Sometimes they come round again and again but I just let them go passed again and again until the chef stops putting them out. Sometimes the chef makes bad things look very enticing and it's difficult to say no, but in the end it is always always my choice what I choose to pick up, and therefore think.

How about that...! It's working really well for me, and on top of this any time I want, I can go inside and feel that inner peace that is "beyond all understanding". A peace I can access anytime that lives inside me, and that I don't need to do anything to earn. I wish I could teach this way of thinking, how many lives I could change.

So, the end of two weeks and so great to be AL free. Thanks to everyone for supporting me and giving me your valuable advice. I'm so grateful to you all.

H

[paulywogg]

Love the thoughts analogy Hazel

[lifechange]

Hazel, what a great analogy with the Japanese restaurant!! I love it.. and so happy to hear you finding your inner peace.. beautiful. Well done on 2 weeks of freedom!:love:

[autumn]

Hazel I love that idea, I have been struggling to explain the idea of how simple it is. And you have have described it perfectly!

I am going to give that some serious thought tonight. So great to hear that you are in a great place. It helps so much. And the fact that you are refusing to act on those dark thoughts is just so positive. Hang onto those positive thoughts. Your doing brilliantly. I hope you are inspiring others to join you.

Sending you hugs xx

[hazeleyes]

Hi Autumn, thanks for staying in touch and for your encouragement. I'm doing great with no AL in site. Still needing to manage headaches and tiredness swings, but not AL cravings, which is great. Decided to learn a new instrument and also crank up my business...so while life is not easy, it's definitely easier than when I was drinking.

Saved a ton of money, free of hang overs, losing weight, and less negative self loathing...all great steps forward that I am proud to have achieved.

I encourage anyone wanting to quit to check out a new way of thinking via the Principles of Mind, Consciousness, and Thought where you create your own reality, and the idea that happiness comes from inside yourself, not from money or people or things. This has been the key for me to get this far with relative ease, compared to the many quits I have attempted over the past 5 years. I suppose it's still early days, but I feel very different and know for me this is the answer I have spent my whole life looking for.

I wish you all well.
H

[NoSugar]

I encourage anyone wanting to quit to check out a new way of thinking via the Principles of Mind, Consciousness, and Thought where you create your own reality, and the idea that happiness comes from inside yourself, not from money or people or things. This has been the key for me to get this far with relative ease, compared to the many quits I have attempted over the past 5 years. I suppose it's still early days, but I feel very different and know for me this is the answer I have spent my whole life looking for.

Hi, Hazeleyes

I'm so very happy for you :hug:. I wish I had been exposed to the 3Ps 3 years ago (or 57 years ago :wink:!) but am grateful to have come to understand this at all. Would it be ok if I quote you on the 3Ps thread? Or better yet, people who read that thread would probably love to hear about your experience: https://www.mywayout.org/community/ge...on-thread.html

Hope to see you over there! NS

[hazeleyes]

Hey NoSugar, feel free to quote me. I've read your thread just never know how or when to jump in and post. Great to be on the same page as you. Oh how I wish everyone could get this way of thinking.

[NoSugar]

Don't overthink it - just post your thoughts :smile:. Maybe I'll misquote you so you'll have to jump in and straighten things out :wink:!