Is it just me or....????? IJM has gone ape crap

[Pavati]

Hi, IJM:

First, if you really were having those thoughts of ending it, I would recommend talking to a doctor. That is not good.

Second, I don't go to AA either, but I was listening to a radio program that was a history of AA, and they interviewed several people. One guy in particular struck me. He talked about how from about 2 months until 6 months he felt WORSE than when he was drinking, especially related to his mood. I had a down period, too. I think it is very common as the giddiness of not drinking goes away, and we realize life is still life, with or without the booze. Also, your brain IS readjusting, which is why the medical research I can find says that days in a row without alcohol is necessary for recovery (as opposed to the odd "slip" here and there).

I am not making much sense, but suffice to say that your condition sounds very normal. Unless you actually were considering suicide, in which case you really could benefit from talking to a doctor.

Hope you're well.
Pav

[ItsJustMe]

Thanks Parvati – That does make sense.

As far as seeing a doctor – while there were some dark feelings, they were not strong enough to act on them. I knew this – it didn’t change the fact that I was having them, but I did know that I could control it. I’m much better now. Also, there are some things I would never see a doctor for – and that is at the top of the list. Mainly, if you see a doc and tell them that, they have a duty to report you. You would most likely be committed for some period of time. If that happens, where I live, that is an automatic revocation of your weapons license. With our government as screwed up as it is now, I’m not sure what other list I might end up on. But that is a whole scenario that I don’t have to worry about. I just have to get through all this and make sure I stay in control.

This weekend has actually turned out pretty awesome. I bought myself a new electronic gadget and have been occupied with it the entire weekend. I’ve also had a honey-do list that has been building for years that I am finally able to start dealing with. I have to say that waking up clear headed is an awesome feeling.

Oh well, back to getting busy on stuff.

Take care,
IJM