Last week of May and into June. Army open for business as usual.

[JackieClaire]

[blink]

morning.

[JackieClaire]

Hello,love. How the divil are you?

[blink]

pretty bad thanks for asking. still sober, though for how long i wouldnt like to guess.

[JackieClaire]

Sorry to hear that (honestly not just a platitude).........but you're as stubborn as the proverbial mule..........you'll not drink.

[Rusty]

Good Morning Blink and Jackie! 5:00 AM here in the States, and a holiday, too!

Blink-ugh...Those white knuckle thoughts of drinking.....Jackie is right! Blink..what was your old MWO name? I can't remember..sorry!

[JackieClaire]

Morning Rusty,
Holiday here as well. Spring Bank holiday....we should be basking in the sunshine, having BBQs and running round the garden in shorts.......top temperature might be 10C (50F) had warmer days in December.

[blink]

roxane. im not white knuckling, as such. just that i have no hope for the future, nothing to look forward to, no point to anything. i have no distractions apart from dog. and thats no way to live. :happy2:

[JackieClaire]

Ahh love, you're right its no way to live. Have you thought about a trip to the doctors, I'm getting signs of depression. (blinking obvious I know).

Any more thoughts on volunteering? Nice bit of kennel cleaning down at the dog shelter.

[Rusty]

Blink-oh, I am truly sorry you are feeling so down.:hug: Just being here and posting here gives you a purpose, I think. You are always so supportive of everyone here. I love Jackie's idea of volunteering. :-)

[blink]

i self referred to iapts. in april. have somehow entered into dispute with them. actually i know how. they ignored what i said at the assessment and gave me a few pieces of paper about cbt and said i was to self help through it. with no support. no next appointment. when i called them they were never available so it got escalated to clinical lead who blustered her way through, saying i was on the wait list for talk therapy, 8 to 10 weeks. contradicting what id previously been told by the assessor. one treatment type only (self help cbt in my case), wait list for talk therapy 5 months, that i had said id, had cbt before and not found it helpful but i would this time. i had never said i'd found it unhelpful, i had said it wasnt what i wanted now, as i had found it helpful then but would be going over old ground. i had actually told the assessor more than necessary that i did not want cbt. and i got cbt. to do on my own. this is just a brief account of all the shit they have caused, theres more i wont go into.

i felt i had to try and help myself, so i self referred to this shambles of a service. i really wish i hadnt as it has made me feel worse. really, what was the point of the stress of it all?

also i need a paying job now ive been dumped by my boss. i have no confidence to apply for any job though. my head is in the sand atm.

[Guitarista]

roxane. im not white knuckling, as such. just that i have no hope for the future, nothing to look forward to, no point to anything. i have no distractions apart from dog. and thats no way to live. :happy2:

Is it time to plot a route, pack a motor bike, and head east through Europe into Asia? Not as expensive, out of reach, or crazy as it sounds. Often forcibly removing ourselves from our environment and shaking things up will work wonders if we're really at wits end. Sounds like it might be far scarier staying where you are Blink than the adventure, exhilaration, and peace of the open road. Maybe rent your joint out if necessary.

Hope things are looking up for you real soon.

[Rusty]

Blink-you are over 3 months AF...I just saw on your signature line. Congratulations to you!!!:yay:

[blink]

Blink-you are over 3 months AF...I just saw on your signature line. Congratulations to you!!!:yay:

dont know where you saw that rusty, ah, you mean guitarista.

[blink]

Is it time to plot a route, pack a motor bike, and head east through Europe into Asia? Not as expensive, out of reach, or crazy as it sounds. Often forcibly removing ourselves from our environment and shaking things up will work wonders if we're really at wits end. Sounds like it might be far scarier staying where you are Blink than the adventure, exhilaration, and peace of the open road. Maybe rent your joint out if necessary.

Hope things are looking up for you real soon.

house is unrentable, needs work that i cant afford to do. also, i tried the get away from here thing a couple of years ago. i went to australia. i took myself with me and it certainly wasnt exhilarating. anyway, my mindset is that nothing is achievable atm, so i think little steps would be more attainable right now.