Army now open week beginning 6th June 2016

[satz123]

Evening ................... 2 days to go in the workhouse ................. and I had to do ACTUAL work :rant:

[stirly-girly]

Hiya Army!!

Satzeroonie - you back at work??i::stompy2::furious:

Not much accomplished here today. Took my car to be repaired first thing this morning. Ended up waiting almost three hours for it to get fixed. At least there were a few shops in the area to browse through but it sure took a lot out of my day. And my pocket....

[JackieClaire]

Hello my darlings,
Didn't forget my passwords..........:yay: but the computer in the other office has taken a dislike to me so much so that I spent a total of over an hour (in two bits) on the phone to the systems support people. It just wouldn't let me log in. :eek-new:They got me sorted. One of the lovely chaps ..........has a Bedlington Terrier and the weather where they are is lovely...........they both had the patience of saints.

No words of wisdom, Mers. Surprised one lady by telling her I used to be a service user.....she's very new and still having problems.........couldn't believe that I looked so well and happy. Just had a wee chat..........told her not to be so hard on her self...........she wasn't hopeless, no-one's going to hit her with a big stick because she yoyo's back and forwards and if I can do it anyone can. Got her signed up for relapse prevention.

[stirly-girly]

Looks like the barracks are deserted and it's just Me, Myself and I here tonight. Am off to bed shortly but wanted to bring this over from the Ladies on a Mission thread. I hope NoSugar won't mind my putting her post here but I think it's something that needs to be there for others to see - Oldies, Newbies, AF-ers, Strugglers. We're all just one drink away from a relapse. NS shows us that we can stop at any time before we actually drink. This is the link to the thread -
https://www.mywayout.org/community/mo...-site-281.html

Here is her post - #11231 on the thread....

I did something today that mystifies me. It was mid-morning and I had to run to the grocery store for a few things. In the checkout aisle was a huge bin of those little (nasty tasting) single-serving bottles of wine. I reached in and tossed a red one on the belt with my other stuff. And bought it. And brought it home and put it in a deep corner of the cupboard. I then worked, took a water aerobics class, etc. and forgot about it until I got home and was taking a hot bath to get over the cold pool. It is down there.

So now I'm posting here. I considered not doing that and either 1) quietly getting rid of it or 2) drinking it to prove to myself I don't need all this BS in my life anymore and can drink a glass of wine if I want to. The truth is, I do believe I could drink 1 (despite all of the contrary evidence) but for over 3 years, I haven't wanted to. I don't even feel like I want to today but there's no denying what I did this morning. And this is at a time that my personal and professional lives are great and fine, respectively. I have no unusual stress and I love this time of year (and do not associate it with drinking).

Maybe my diminished involvement here has allowed some of my brain changes to revert in ways I don't recognize or understand. I used to post a lot about why abstinence is the best/easiest choice for most people who make it here. With so few members struggling (which is great news!) and no new people to encourage, I think I've stopped doing for myself what has been working for a long time.

It was sad but I wasn't even sure where on MWO I could post this. My Ego wanted to use that as an excuse to just handle it on my own or with a couple AF friends I talk to every day. They would have helped me, I know. But there is something about a "public" proclamation that matters to me. It helps me to know that it might help, or at least caution, someone else.

So, I came back to what was my home thread until all the kids grew up and it became an empty nest. I didn't do too well with that in my real life and apparently not here, either. The possibility of MWO folding may also have played a role. When something unpleasant looms, I always just want to get it over with. Drinking that bottle likely would have done the trick - I might have left MWO before it leaves me.

So now I'm going to do what I've suggested countless times to others on this site - just dump it out. That $1.00 bottle of cheap wine taught me a priceless lesson.

xx, NS

As I posted on the Loamers thread - good for you, NS, on sharing with us. What can lead up to a relapse is something we all need to be aware of and reminded of.

Catch up with youz tomorrowz, Army. Nighty, night and sweet dreams....

Edited to add - X-post Jackie. Talk to you tomorrow...

[NoSugar]

I don't mind your reposting it Stirly. In fact, I was thinking of posting here originally but knew you'd all be in bed anyway. As my follow up post said, I feel fine today but several things about the experience concern me and I'm ready to learn from it.

[JackieClaire]

Good morning,
I hope I don't get too rambling here. I had a few doubts about describing my thoughts and feelings about the last hour of the wedding the other day............I could easily said it was fine.......
But that and you, Sugarbabe, buying the bottle of wine brings up a question for me.........I'll get to it in a minute.

In AA a sponsor has a his/her own sponsor to help them. I know that in counselling a counsellor has a more senior counsellor to help them.

The fact is that MWO is now very much a for long term abstainers or those looking for long term abstinence.

We're all very good at helping those struggling but when we have doubts even after years we should voice them.

Anyway the question is ..................who sponsors the sponsor?

BTW I'm using the word sponsor as I can't think of another way of putting it.

[satz123]

Hello my darlings,
Didn't forget my passwords..........:yay: but the computer in the other office has taken a dislike to me so much so that I spent a total of over an hour (in two bits) on the phone to the systems support people. It just wouldn't let me log in. :eek-new:They got me sorted. One of the lovely chaps ..........has a Bedlington Terrier and the weather where they are is lovely...........they both had the patience of saints.

No words of wisdom, Mers. Surprised one lady by telling her I used to be a service user.....she's very new and still having problems.........couldn't believe that I looked so well and happy. Just had a wee chat..........told her not to be so hard on her self...........she wasn't hopeless, no-one's going to hit her with a big stick because she yoyo's back and forwards and if I can do it anyone can. Got her signed up for relapse prevention.

What a lovely story Jacks - to be able to say you've been there is worth a thousand others who try to help but haven't actually experienced the disease

[NoSugar]

Good morning,
I hope I don't get too rambling here. I had a few doubts about describing my thoughts and feelings about the last hour of the wedding the other day............I could easily said it was fine.......
But that and you, Sugarbabe, buying the bottle of wine brings up a question for me.........I'll get to it in a minute.

In AA a sponsor has a his/her own sponsor to help them. I know that in counselling a counsellor has a more senior counsellor to help them.

The fact is that MWO is now very much a for long term abstainers or those looking for long term abstinence.

We're all very good at helping those struggling but when we have doubts even after years we should voice them.

Anyway the question is ..................who sponsors the sponsor?

BTW I'm using the word sponsor as I can't think of another way of putting it.

I appreciated your post the other day, Jackie. I used to be concerned that long-time AF people didn't ever have experiences like that or have the thought that a drink would be a good idea. (Or do something as crazy as impulsively buying a bottle of wine that they didn't even want ). I knew I did have those thoughts now and then so did it mean I wasn't really "well"? But, we're humans with very complex brains and about 60000 thoughts a day. Some of those are going to be crazy things that we would never act on. I've had the thought to buy wine for me to drink before but until 2 days ago, hadn't done it for over 3 years. So, I gave that thought too much weight but am glad I didn't follow it any further.

I also hesitated to post what happened for a couple reasons:
1. Embarrassed that I did it and it felt hypocritical given all I've written on this forum
2. Didn't want to make other people feel like relapse is inevitable because even a very committed person will eventually screw up.

But, I still mean everything I've written about not drinking being the way to go and I don't think relapse is at all inevitable. I also think it is better if people acknowledge how they feel, like you did. It is actually reassuring to know that occasional contradictory thoughts and feelings happen to others, too, and don't really mean anything as long as you recognize them for what they are.

In real life, sponsor-sponsee relations are private so a person likely doesn't see their sponsor in the role of the one being guided by someone else. I suppose that could happen here in private conversations. I think there's benefit in just putting it "out there", though, and acknowledging that there are ups and downs at all stages of sobriety. I've received very valuable and supportive comments regarding my post on the Loamers thread from people with more and others with less time AF. I think the process works best when it goes in both directions and having it be "public" enables others to benefit from the experience.

[JackieClaire]

Hi SugarB,
Crikey 60,000 a day.........should double that for me as I'm a terrible over thinker

I reckon a little reminder now and again that we are vulnerable has to be a good thing.................mighty miserable for a time .............the thought has popped up, we recognised it, dealt with it and it makes us stronger for the next time.

[IamMary]

Late check in..its been one of those days, car wouldnt start and it went on from there :livid:

Popped on a few times and read with much interest and appreciation the NS vs Vino story.
11 months on and I am still having to watch myself, use the tools Ive learned here, now more than earlier in the year as things seem to have shifted in my head with this good weather.. But none of us can ever be complacent, can we?
And thats fine, but its good to be reminded.
So Thank you NS :hug:

JC - lovely story about that woman, I imagine she's delighted to have you as her role model.

[satz123]

Morning Army

Yes Mers I can understand the association of alcohol & hot weather.
It is so rare that in this country we tend to go into holiday mode as soon as the sun shines. Holiday = booze
And outside activities are not normally surfing or swimming but a beer garden ....
Or maybe that's just Mr S & my family

God love us we are just not used to it and never know how long it will last.

Add into the mix now that the media are trying to whip up an Ireland football frenzy again and it's difficult.
Be vigilant - we can do it without alcohol .......

YouTube

[satz123]

[JackieClaire]

Morning darlings far and just a plane ride away.

Thanks for that, Satz, love.

Mers, you're spot on with the complacency thing. Now you don't have to stay on high alert like a meerkat..........just keep those tools tucked away but in easy reach.








Funnily enough never really liked drinking outside as I'm scared witless of wasps.

[IamMary]

Mers, you're spot on with the complacency thing. Now you don't have to stay on high alert like a meerkat..........just keep those tools tucked away but in easy reach.
.

haha.. yep, its just getting that balance right, not too much. My stomach still does nervous twirls when a new occasion is suggested - 'Lets all meet for dinner and leave the cars', 'Blah de blah's wedding.. we should all get hammered, its been ages'.. My first though is PANIC. Still.
Even the stupid emoticons on text messages, wine party cocktails food beer.. Just FECK off!!!

Not just your clan Satz.. Are you completely finished work now?? you having a big going away party, getting locked, haha!

12 kids here, not sure how that happened :hmms:
better fly...

[JackieClaire]

haha.. yep, its just getting that balance right, not too much. My stomach still does nervous twirls when a new occasion is suggested - 'Lets all meet for dinner and leave the cars', 'Blah de blah's wedding.. we should all get hammered, its been ages'.. My first though is PANIC. Still.
Even the stupid emoticons on text messages, wine party cocktails food beer.. Just FECK off!!!

Not just your clan Satz.. Are you completely finished work now?? you having a big going away party, getting locked, haha!.

How's about saying..........Just as well I don't drink any more.........saves on taxi fares/ self respect/ hangovers/the kids really like their new mammy

12 kids here, not sure how that happened :hmms:
better fly...

Now then..............there was a mummy bee and a daddy bee who loved each other very much and some flowers..........