One Step at a Time - July 20016

[aihfl]

Happy 4th to everyone. I'll be glad when it's over. The illegal ones have been going off every night. Shakes the house and sets off car alarms.
I count my blessings that I have never experienced real explosions in my life. War zones or even violent neighborhoods. I am so blessed.

No kidding. The dog has been flipping out the past two nights. I was thinking about riding my bike to downtown Orlando (only about 2 miles), but I have one library DVD due tomorrow and another Netflix DVD I'd like to get in the mail so I can get another movie this week so I will probably stay in and see if I can see the fireworks from the street.

[aihfl]

Rode my bike downtown to see the fireworks. Nature ended up putting on an even more spectacular light show with a storm off to the west!

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[ToMyHealth]

Glad 4th is over also. Was quite a hot day here in SW FL. One of my friends passed out. Dehydration. Learned about it after the fact. She was treated & released from hospital. Last night she said she was fine but very tired.
On Sunday despite the lady having a 39 on the front 9 and the guy a 41, we won! We were nip & tuck til Hole 12. We took 12, 13, 14, 15 and game over. Played it out and went in for lunch. What's neat about these tourneys is you get to know people better. They were great sports & we had fun.
Yes, sad about the tree. Meth addicts common? Guess I live a protected life too. Believe you, just not exposed to such.
Rusty, when I started volunteering at hospital co-worker was named Rusty. She was lovely. I say was because she moved to east coast. And when I got into selling/buying/moving I quit. Doubt I'll go back.
Aihfl, I used to do the Netflix DVD. Then at Christmas dd & SIL gave us some deal where you can streamline. However, I can't seem to,get it to work anymore. Kept meaning to have a tutorial while in Canada but never did. Now Netflix is telling me they want me back and can have a full month free. Think I'll take advantage. Any movie recommendations?

Going to,start couch to,5k run plan today AND bike. Time to take some weight off and get in better shape.
Have a good one!

[paulywogg]

Hey all,hope everyone had a nice holiday,I had fun but am soooo glad its over,just too much stimulation and not enough sleep,also hubs dropped a bomb on me Thursday that he wants to quit his mechanic job and go back to plumbing, Ihad to reach out to ssomeone to talk it out and luckily the Army gang was around,this move is trigger to me because
1.Ihate change!
2.we drank heavily during his plumbing years bad memories!
3.he has a steady job now,hates it but steady
4.I know he'sgonna start bitching about the heat,driving,customers,etc
5.we need that guaranteed check every week
6.all the above is giving me butterflies in my tummy,my goodness,why always something? I guess I just hafta detach,save my money,focus on my job,this sucks balls,hope we all have a great Tuesday,much love to all,back later

[NoraC]

Pauly - I'm so sorry. It's great that the Army was around to talk to. :hug:

[aihfl]

Glad 4th is over also. Was quite a hot day here in SW FL. One of my friends passed out. Dehydration. Learned about it after the fact. She was treated & released from hospital. Last night she said she was fine but very tired.
On Sunday despite the lady having a 39 on the front 9 and the guy a 41, we won! We were nip & tuck til Hole 12. We took 12, 13, 14, 15 and game over. Played it out and went in for lunch. What's neat about these tourneys is you get to know people better. They were great sports & we had fun.
Yes, sad about the tree. Meth addicts common? Guess I live a protected life too. Believe you, just not exposed to such.
Rusty, when I started volunteering at hospital co-worker was named Rusty. She was lovely. I say was because she moved to east coast. And when I got into selling/buying/moving I quit. Doubt I'll go back.
Aihfl, I used to do the Netflix DVD. Then at Christmas dd & SIL gave us some deal where you can streamline. However, I can't seem to,get it to work anymore. Kept meaning to have a tutorial while in Canada but never did. Now Netflix is telling me they want me back and can have a full month free. Think I'll take advantage. Any movie recommendations?

Going to,start couch to,5k run plan today AND bike. Time to take some weight off and get in better shape.
Have a good one!

TMH, yeah, this week is going to be brutal. High 90s and no rain in sight. You are indeed sheltered but missing out on some great comedy. As I've said before, there are stupid people everywhere, but nowhere else seems to have the mix of stupidity combined with gall/brazenness as Florida does. The local news is some of the best comedy. I also recommend reading Carl Hiaasen novels. He's a columnist for the Miami Herald but he writes darkly comic novels about stupid criminals and corrupt politicians in Florida. A lot of his material, by his own admission, comes from outlandish news items he's come across at The Herald. The last movie DVD I got from Netflix was Thirty Days of Night, a novel take on the vampire genre, where they head north to Alaska and the month-long night they experience during winter. I've been binge watching The Glades on Netflix streaming, a tongue-in-cheek detective series that aired on A&E that's set in Florida.

So have any of you had the experience of people you were once close to that resented you for getting sober, that weren't addicts themselves? My ex-girlfriend sent me a series of testy text messages over the weekend. I hadn't heard from her in weeks and she texted to wish me a happy Fourth. I asked her what prompted her to send a text out of the blue and told her I was still open to being friends, but deciding to send the occasional text out of the blue when we haven't spoken in weeks was a little odd. She said the memories of my drinking overshadowed the good memories and that she will leave me alone. I told her it was for the best then, that I had about four months sober, and thought that was it. Then she sent me another message telling me, "Good luck with your future with your ex-wife," which was a little odd, unless she somehow resents the fact I have a civil relationship with my ex-wife, but why would she care? Anyway, in my final message to her, I told her that my ex-wife and I will not have a "future" together and that I have been seeing someone else. Her final message was quite hostile saying she was deleting my contact information. I didn't respond after that, because I really don't care.

The reason I'm telling all of you about this is that for a while, I flattered myself by thinking that she still thought we could reconcile at some point in the future and was leaving the door open. I no longer think this is the case. I really think she is bugged I finally got my life together and am relatively happy and have some sense of well-being at this point. Has anyone else experienced this?

[Rusty]

Good Morning, Friends,

Aihfl-

The reason I'm telling all of you about this is that for a while, I flattered myself by thinking that she still thought we could reconcile at some point in the future and was leaving the door open. I no longer think this is the case. I really think she is bugged I finally got my life together and am relatively happy and have some sense of well-being at this point. Has anyone else experienced this?

I think you are right about this, and YES, I have experienced it...except the resentful person was and still is, a worse drinker than I was. She is jealous because now that you are sober, she is probably thinking, "Well, he has a clear head now so why didn't he want to get back together with me." No, you don't care about her. As someone I knew said once, "Don't let her take up space in your brain for free." If you broke up with her, her attitude is just sour grapes. You've moved on...if she wants to take cheap shots at you and throw your drinking history in your face, then she's not good enough for you anyway. You're dating a woman who is your intellectual equal and I am so, so happy for you.

I am supposed to be on vacation this week but I am with my favorite client. He is good to me and he pays me well. I wish I had a dozen more like him.

[paulywogg]

Hey all,been kinda quiet here lately,hope all are ok,Liz,who was that adorable baby you were holding on FB? Looks like you had a fun 4th,hello to everyone, hope this workday goes fast,adios

[mama bear]

I am here!!
We worked our rears off at the lake in the 100 degree heat for two days and lazed around yesterday.
But I am working today and have a conference call in 10 minutes.
Nana wants to spend her money "before it taken", so she wants to take us all on a trip. Sunday night dinner was horrible....Nana and SIL are so damn opinionated and snarky....I almost lost it. Family......UGH!!
Anyway...I have a nice tan going and I am getting my roots did on Saturday, so I be all purty!!
Off to my call...
Love you alll

[aihfl]

Good Morning, Friends,

Aihfl-

I think you are right about this, and YES, I have experienced it...except the resentful person was and still is, a worse drinker than I was. She is jealous because now that you are sober, she is probably thinking, "Well, he has a clear head now so why didn't he want to get back together with me." No, you don't care about her. As someone I knew said once, "Don't let her take up space in your brain for free." If you broke up with her, her attitude is just sour grapes. You've moved on...if she wants to take cheap shots at you and throw your drinking history in your face, then she's not good enough for you anyway. You're dating a woman who is your intellectual equal and I am so, so happy for you.

I am supposed to be on vacation this week but I am with my favorite client. He is good to me and he pays me well. I wish I had a dozen more like him.

Rusty, you got out of Florida just in time. We have been having an insane heat wave this week. It was still 87 degrees after midnight last night. And there is no rain in sight.

The irony is that I was the one that was dumped due to my inability to stay sober. Even after she dumped me toward the end of last July she still continued to string me along for 8 months. The good thing is my new SO knows my history and told me that she's dated an alcoholic and will not have any tolerance for it. So everything's already out in the open. WHich I think is good.

[Lizann]

Quick check in from work. The baby is Zachary, Cjs bf nephew. He turned a year old on the fourth. A real sweet happy little guy.

[Lizann]

Hey guys. Busy couple of days for me. I'm working an extra day tomorrow. We are in the midst of a heat wave so a good place to be is inside. Just a quick check in for me. Hope everyone's doing ok.

[mama bear]

Aihfla...I agree that's it's best to open from the start.
And yes, beloved Rusty...you got out of here just in time.
Off to spend the day visiting properties with my boss....gotta blaze
Always thinking of my virtual family...xoxox

[Rusty]

Good Morning Everyone and Happy Thursday!!

I am officially on vacation this week but I was on site for 11 HOURS with my favorite client. I will gratefully accept the work. I will need a new car soon and new decks so it's all good. :-) Spa day for me today...nails, lashes, pedicure. Ooh la la!!!

Mama:hug:Well, I guess that is kind of Nana to want to take you on a trip, but would you really want to spend all that time with her???? Ugh, you poor dear. So sorry you are going through all this mess. I wish I lived close to you. We would hook up and all we would do is laugh.

Liz-Little Zachary is SO cute!! Beautiful pics of you and hubs on FB!! Are you off tomorrow?

TMH-so glad you had fun at the golf tournament! My dad was a HUGE golfer...it was his passion...growing up, we belong to two clubs so he could play when he wanted. I tried to learn how to play golf but to no avail. I did not enjoy it enough to practice.

Aihfl-regarding the ex-girlfriend...I really believe she acted that way because her ego was bruised. You got sober but you didn't want her badly enough to BEG her to come back. YOU found someone FAR better. I wanted to mention something but I hope it is not out of school for me to post this: you said on another thread that you were furious with your mother because you asked for her help on something, and she refused..she belittled you by telling you that all her friends' kids were self-sufficient and independent, and why weren't you, etc. You are making the right decision by cutting her off. If you can't cut her off altogether, then establish a healthy physical and emotional distance from you so she can't hurt you. I struggled to remain sober until I cut two long-time "friends" out of my life. I taxed our friendships with my drunken behavior, missed play dates, etc. I apologized and wrote them letters, telling them how sorry I was that my drinking made me an unreliable friend. I thought that once I got sober that they would be delighted! NO! One of them kept egging me to drink with him and the other kept throwing my drinking in my face. When I told them I was cutting them out of my life, they were shocked and hurt. Why, why, why...we had been friends for almost 20 years...what did they do wrong???? Really????? A third person, ironically, has been sober for 14 years. She drove me home numerous times when I was drinking, etc., Again, I really, really taxed our friendship. I apologized....wrote her and her husband letters, expressing my sincere regret. It turns out....she thought she could boss me around when I was drinking and found she couldn't do that anymore. She was about to become #3 on my list and I told her that if she didn't change her attitude, she would be #3. Well, guess what? She turned around. I still see her, but only once a year. That's enough. Hahaha!

Wow, I better get to the gym! Big hellos to everyone else!

[NoraC]

Quick check in from work. Doing ok here. I just haven't had my computer on and I'm so bad at posting from my phone or kindle.

Have a great vacation, Rusty!