One Step at a Time - August 2016

[Eloise]

We don't know when we leave yet Paulywogg.
My hd has been looking for a job for 4 years, so in spite of the poor air quality, we will be going and make the best of things.
I am pretty sure there are lots of valid reasons not to take this job, like the school is really disorganised, but one of us has to be gainfully employed. I found a couple of opportunities in the US, but the pay was not enough to be considered.
Actually one was offering 17,000 to teach art part-time (but the schedule was a few classes 5 days a week) in a private day school. It would have been very difficult to combine with something else, never mind it would have been a transatlantic move we would pay for. Sorry, I am complaining. The other job was in Arizona and I read all over the internet that the pay was terrible at this Charter School, although we never got that far. I couldn't even get them to talk about pay, we had 4 interviews. Oh, and it was in a terrible neighbourhood. Terrible meaning the internet says 'gang activity.' I am not sure exactly what that means, but it doesn't sound good. That said, moving China seemed like the obvious choice.
And the city we are going to looks pretty nice.
The expenses are covered and if the all goes poorly we come home. No harm done.

Hey all, Eloise, that sounds like a fun adventure my daughters bf's brother taught in Japan for a bit,met his wife and now they have a son and live in Oregon, not sure I could do China though with the air quality, I've read it's bad but that's only cuz I'm xtra sensitive as we all know when do you leave? Hi Techie! I want the new galaxy note, omg,that phone is sexy!!! Hello to all I hope we all have a wonderful day

[Eloise]

This all sounds kind of positive.
We are doing this because it is the best 'package' I could find short notice.
The employment situation here is not good and I do not want to give up my career as an art teacher.
I am good at it and I like it. I hope our dog likes it too. :egad:

I did the expat thing in Japan for a couple of years out of college. I worked in a government office mostly doing grunt translation work, but it left me plenty of time to enjoy being there. In fact, living on Okinawa, south of the Japanese mainland, it was much cheaper for me to travel around the rest of Asia than it was Japan, so that's what I did. I got to South Korea, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Thailand and Indonesia. My mother is from Okinawa, so I'm planning a trip back there soon to see her family.

About 4-5 years ago, I did send in an application to teach at Suzhou University an hour west of Shanghai, but I was married at the time and made it clear that I would only consider going if my ex-wife and I came as a package deal. They solicited further supporting materials from me, but not her. Then a few days later, the air pollution in China was a front page headline in the New York Times, so I let it go.

I don't know if it can be considered a real expat experience but I also worked every summer from 2001-2009 in Peru, except for 2006, when I taught in the Czech Republic. Since the seasons are reversed with that part of South America, I would leave Florida as soon as school was finished and come back in late August or early September.

I miss international travel and can't wait for my next overseas adventure back to Japan.

Well, I am off today, so I'm going to head out and finish cleaning up the apartment I lived in for a year before the rain returns. We're forecast to get close to another inch today, so I'd better shake a leg. I'm glad this tropical storm will blow through before the weekend because I have plans to go to the Florida State Ole Miss game on Labor Day, Go 'Noles! (PhD, '04)

[SKendall]

Eloise, that sounds like an amazing experience and a challenge. World travel certainly expands us. I haven't done Asia, just Europe.

AIhfl, I envy you your experiences also. How many languages do you speak?

Rusty, you forgot me, lol. I'm glad you get to be home and paid.

Mama, glad you're here.

Glassie, love to hear from you.

TMH, you're doing pretty well.

Techie, how are you doing and how is the treatment going?

Lizz, after reading about your delicious dinner, I'm craving fresh corn today.

Nora, how are you today?

Pauly, have a good day yourself.

I'm leaving Thursday to see Vivian, so excited.

[Lizann]

Quick check in from work. Hello to all and I will check back tonight. Off to take a quick walk after my lunch.

[Rusty]

SKendall-OMG I forgot you and I am SO sorry. I am such a SHIT!!! I am so sorry! I DID read your story about your douchebag neighbors and I am hoping you can get out of that situation PRONTO. I hope you can forgive me for my absentmindedness. I think about you a lot, though. I owe you a PM.:hug: Sorry, hun, my mom has to have surgery and my ginormously large panties are in a wad. More later. Oooh...you are leaving to see your granddaughter....so happy for you. Maybe we can have a chat chat chat before you leave?

[aihfl]

You are such a world traveler...sounds like you have had amazing adventures in your lifetime. I find worldly people (especially when I'm dating) to be very fascinating and mentally attractive. I have been to Fuji City, Hiroshima and a bunch of other places. I LOVE Japanese food, and I was treated like gold when I was there.

I'll take that as a compliment, Rusty :thanks: I frequently commiserate with a close friend from college about the sad state of online dating. For a while, I let it really bother me that I hardly heard back from anyone when personally, I think I'm a catch (I know I'm biased, lol). Let's see, traveled extensively, check; educated, check; decent employment, check; interesting hobbies (sailing, kayaking, scuba, cycling, etc.), check. Perhaps I should put in my profile that I am an unemployed high school dropout into NASCAR (not that there's anything wrong with it, it just evokes a certain stereotype). She is Chinese-American and sarcastically said, just put up a profile that says you're an Asian woman and you'll hear from all kinds of creepy people!

And thank you for your kind words about my AF time. Looking back, in the span of about five years, I went from being on a university faculty to drinking tallboys of cheap beer behind a convenience store with a bunch of homeless people. Even though I had a little fleabag apartment, as my girlfriend at the time put it, "I was homeless with a home." It's really amazing that in just six months off the sauce I have rebounded professionally and am a homeowner again. Honestly, before I checked myself into detox the last time, I never thought I was going to be able to stop. I remember telling my mother that this is how things are, and how things are going to be. When I left detox, I felt that somehow this time was different, but I didn't know how and I couldn't explain why. I still can't. It's not because of AA - I haven't been to a meeting in three months (got sick of being told I wasn't going about sobriety the "right" way) and it's not because life stopped sucking at times. Maybe this is what a case of what's referred to in medicine as "spontaneous remission." I don't know. But I wouldn't have it any other way now.

Well, I hear thunder outside so I finished the last of the cleaning of my rental apartment the past year just in time. Time to hit the shower and get this sweat stink off me. Have a great day everyone.

[paulywogg]

Hey all,yeah Eloise you've got nothing to lose by going to China I still think it's a fun adventure, SK,you have a fun,safe trip, I'll bet you're so excited! I love the name Vivian btw I asked Kell about names, I know it's kinda soon but I was leaning toward something with an L so we could have Louie and ? But Google came up with horrible L names,bleh, I totally forgot about the Hylands allergy tablets I have, I took two this morning and was way better than yesterday but I'm not holding my breath cuz sometimes things work and then they don't,Aihfl,I thought you really enjoyed your AA meetings? I hope you peeps in FL don't get too pummeled by the storms brewing, I've been getting my 10,000 steps but stopping between there and 15,000 I was pushing myself too hard too soon and I think that's why I got such burn out,my new fitbit charger came today so that's good, tiredof jiggling the old one to charge,hope everyone had a nice day

[Lizann]

China, wow. That does sound like an adventure.
SK enjoy the trip to see Vivian.
Pauly glad you're feeling better. Would kelly consider a name you suggest?
Rusty, don't work too hard.
I hope all of you in Florida are safe. It sounds like it's going to be a lot of rain. It'll probably head up here at some point. They usually do.
So, quiet night here. CJ and Erin are hanging out with their third (?) cousins. It's a long story but they don't really know each that well. They decided on their own to meet up and have dinner. I am beyond thrilled. You can never have too much family!

[NoraC]

Hello all - just so busy at work and didn't get a chance to post. I wish I had the time to comment on everything.

We have such amazing travelers din our midst and I'm so impressed by you all.

Things going ok here. Hubby going to talk to the dr about his depression. I did go to the chiro yesterday. My neck and down into my back are killing me today. I don't know if I slept wrong or if it's from the adjustment. Because she really worked on me because I was so tight. She recommends a massage actually.

I'll try to post more tomorrow. I've got to take care of stuff before I can settle in. :checkin:

Glassie - Hope everything is ok with you and that you're loving your new job. :hug:

[NoraC]

TMH - I'm sorry I missed your 3 week mark. CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

[actiongirl46]

Hi all - I'm here!! Just checking in . . . TMH congrat's on the 3 weeks! I'm so proud of you.

Life is good here, can't think of any big news, I'll be back soon - AG

[actiongirl46]

And thank you for your kind words about my AF time. Looking back, in the span of about five years, I went from being on a university faculty to drinking tallboys of cheap beer behind a convenience store with a bunch of homeless people. Even though I had a little fleabag apartment, as my girlfriend at the time put it, "I was homeless with a home." It's really amazing that in just six months off the sauce I have rebounded professionally and am a homeowner again.

aihfl - being a fellow academic of sorts, please share if you feel comfortable . . . how did the tallboy thing behind the convenience store start?? What kept it going? I'm curious . . .

[aihfl]

Good morning everyone. It is a gray drizzly morning in Central Florida. That's how tropical systems always begin. It'll be a rain event mostly here, which is not a bad thing. For a place that is surrounded by water, water shortages are always a concern in most of the state and it seems like this summer has been drier and hotter than normal.

Pauly, AA served a purpose in my life at one point, and that purpose is gone as I continue to evolve as a sober person. I am grateful they were there in early sobriety. After my divorce and post-marriage ex-girlfriend dumped me, I was alone and didn't know how to get a life. So I basically drank to pass the time. When that option was no longer tolerable, AA provided me with a new circle of friends. However, along the way, I did figure out how to have a life. I got back to my old hobbies I abandoned and established a new circles of friends that revolved around those activities and had less of a need for the support I got in AA. Eventually I quit going mostly because of hostility toward evidence-based medical and psychological treatment. I have gone back and tried to figure out over and over what is different this time. I'd been wanting to stop drinking for years, but never was able. During my last stay in a detox, the psychiatrist put me on a new antidepressant, Celexa. There have been clinical trials that show Celexa decreases interest in drinking among alcoholics. It has also elevated my mood and helped with my generalized anxiety. That is what I think is different this time. I am also working through issues that I used to drink over with a psychotherapist. The last time I tried to talk about how medicine has a role in addiction treatment at a meeting, I was rudely shouted down. I got tired of the condescending, unsolicited advice and constantly having to defend myself for seeing a psychiatrist and psychotherapist and that the "right" way to be sober is to have a sponsor you talk to every day and working the steps. When I came back at people and told them I had tried that approach multiple times with no success, I was then told that the failure was mine and mine alone. In hindsight, the "right" way to be sober is whatever keeps YOU sober. Moreover, I don't think many people in AA mean well at all, after having met a woman who ended up being stalked by a man she met in AA. And really, the last straw was being recognized by two different homeless people who attended one of the meetings I went to. The first time, I was sitting outside a bar with my dodgeball team in downtown Orlando sipping a club soda when this person came up and asked me if I was relapsing in front of all my teammates. The second time was when I encountered a second homeless person while taking a break with my cycling group on one of the local bike trails who took it upon myself to ask if I was staying sober and why I wasn't coming to meetings anymore in front of all my friends. Both times I was mortified. So yeah, I have no use for AA anymore. I did at one point, but not anymore.

AG, hanging out with the homeless thing is related to the previous paragraph. When my girlfriend dumped me because of my drinking and prescription drug abuse, that was the first time since 1996 I didn't have a girlfriend or wife. At the time, I suppose they were just people to talk to. I was reminded of that yesterday when I went to Publix (grocery store) and saw a rattily dressed man buying a 4 pack of Natural Ice tallboys and digging around his pocket for enough change at 9am. I can't get on my high horse when I see that because I was that man not so long ago.

Anyway, I've poached enough time from work to write this. If you got all the way through this long-winded tome, thanks for reading! Have a great day.

[paulywogg]

Hey all, that was a great post Aihfl,I have been behind the guy digging for change for those 9 am tall boys,it brings a tear to my eye because I too have been there,I was just curious about the AA thing, I go on sober recovery and I swear some of those people seem almost brainwashed by AA and I know when I went it was the same,they talked about peeps who used to attend meetings then stopped going, one guy ran into one of his friends at a store and they talked, both still sober but one guy quit going to meetings,upon leaving the AA guy said"see you when you come back" basically assuming that the other guy couldn't stay sober without AA,I just say whatever works do it I guess, AG,how's the nal going? Have you been getting in AF days? I think we need to try some evening posting If anyone's interested? I need more coffee can't think straight haha,much love my friends, hope today is wonderful for us all

[aihfl]

Pauly, I had a friend from AA who is a realtor and I was going to use her to help me find a condo. The last time I spoke with her after I quit going to meetings, she basically said in so many words that she can't worry about my inevitable relapse and needs to focus on herself. So I found another realtor. Every few weeks I still get the occasional "have you relapsed yet?" calls. The AA Big Book states in the foreward, and I quote, "We do not possess a monopoly on sobriety," but try telling that to the people in AA sheesh.