August Army 2016....Gates are open

[NoSugar]

I agree with you, Satz. I've learned a lot from the people here who never give up and when it finally clicks for them (looking at you, Nora :hug, it is just about the best thing ever!!

In a way, my falesly inflated ego helped me for about the first month or so because I knew myself well enough to know that if I failed, I was likely to slink away. And, I'd somehow gotten it into my head that this was my "last chance". Those 2 thoughts (which I no longer hold) were actually helpful at the time. I didn't want to leave and there seemed to be no other options so... I didn't drink.

Now I see there are much healthier and more positive ways to quit!

[satz123]

NS - luckily that worked for you at the time
A question : if you were back at the start again - what would be your approach ?
I get the feeling you would have a different way of dealing with it. I apologise if you outline this in Newbies nest or elsewhere - but I'm too lazy to read back

I've listened to the most recent Youtube video you posted - Jackie - the Scottish lady.
Brilliant while I was listening but went off then into life and forgot to apply it :egad:

[paulywogg]

Satz,thank you I'll never give up! This is what I truly want, I just need to keep the momentum going when I have it instead of going back to old thinking that drinking is the answer to all my woes,it only makes things worse for me,I'm getting to where my body/ mind can't tolerate it anymore, I've just broke too many promises to myself and it's really hard to be positive about the future but I'm trying gaddam it! Thanks again

[satz123]

Satz,thank you
I'll never give up! This is what I truly want
I'm getting to where my body/ mind can't tolerate it anymore,

:welldone:
You will get to the point where you just WON'T tolerate it anymore & it will just stick. :hug:

[NoSugar]

I've listened to the Scottish Lady video a couple times, Satz. For one thing, I like what she says but I also find the way she speaks to be so soothing.

Regarding quitting, I don't think it needs to be as traumatic and fearful as it seemed to me at first. My whole experience improved when I listened to Lav and started being grateful for the amazing changes in my life; even things that still weren't good certainly were at least 'better'. And like I said, I no longer have the crazy idea that failure is permanent. We always have the opportunity to change.

On the other hand, if my head had been then where it is now, I don't think I would have gotten addicted in the first place!! So, maybe it had to be the way it was. I like to try to help newbies see that quitting isn't a curse but an opportunity to choose to live the lives they want and deserve. The sooner a person can see that, the less painful the experience, I think.

[satz123]

Yes - she is very soothing to listen to.
I agree quitting is not a curse & I try to get that across to young Satz too.
This sober life is a GOOD thing.

Believing that is what made it relatively easy for me to quit back in the day

[satz123]

:emptiness:

[IamMary]

:emptiness:

This is truely inspiring :snowman:

Good posts today. I keep meaning to listen to that link NS posted too.. I'll get around to it.
I did read that article either NS or Kuya posted recently, about 'identifying' as an alcoholic.. Really well written and made me feel less of an oddity. Alcohol seems to be the only addiction that your supposed to carry the label around with you.. I don't want to, I just don't drink anymore. Same way as I don't smoke anymore - im not a cigarette-aholic.
But then again, I've zero desire to smoke again, no pull there and there wasn't after a year. With booze, it is different.

Pauly, do you have trouble nodding off at night or do you wake up and can't get back to sleep?
Stress will do it for me at times but sleeping tablets knocked it on the head when I was very bad at one point. That was also when I started drinking alone.. 20 years ago!

[IamMary]

Night Molly. Missed your there.
Hope you sleep tonight. Yep, it's does make everything work better the next day.

[satz123]

Alcohol seems to be the only addiction that your supposed to carry the label around with you.. I don't want to, I just don't drink anymore.

Agree entirely Mers. I refuse to carry a label around with me for the rest of my life.
The past is the past leave it behind and move forward.
It is only worth re-visiting to draw on experience to help others - which in turn reminds us how lucky we are to be free of it.

[IamMary]

Agree entirely Mers. I refuse to carry a label around with me for the rest of my life.
The past is the past leave it behind and move forward.
It is only worth re-visiting to draw on experience to help others - which in turn reminds us how lucky we are to be free of it.

Thats very true. Maybe its because of the success of AA and the mantra attached (I am an alcoholic and powerless to alcohol etc) that has cemented this idea. Even drug addicts talk about it in past tense, but with alcohol, you are always supposed to be recovering.
I like the idea that alcohol is powerless over me now, not the other way around. At long bloody last!

[satz123]

[NoSugar]

Thats very true. Maybe its because of the success of AA and the mantra attached (I am an alcoholic and powerless to alcohol etc) that has cemented this idea. Even drug addicts talk about it in past tense, but with alcohol, you are always supposed to be recovering.

It might relate to the fact that society deems illegal drugs (or overuse of Rx drugs) as BAD, smoking clearly causes cancer and affects others, so it also is BAD, but drinking is different. Society goes to great lengths to glamorize alcohol and promote its benefits - the problem there has to be the addict, not the drug, so that everyone else can merrily go on drinking without guilt or worry. Drinking has become the third rail - doctors tend to avoid the subject and when they do bring it up, quietly accept the obvious lies (I didn't have a permanently red-stained tongue from a single glass of wine with dinner each night!). Health gurus who tell you to avoid the carbs in carrots (!), assure their followers that moderate alcohol consumption is fine... We've been (were :smile brainwashed!

[NoSugar]

And... Only an addicted drinker is supposed to accept a label and define themselves by their addiction: alcoholic. There are no smokics or drugics.

'I am a smoker' or 'I am a drug addict' means that these things are currently true. After they quit, they say they were smokers or were addicted to drugs.

'I am an alcoholic' is said in present tense but somehow it means forever.

[Guitarista]

Booze - a socially acceptable but deceptively lethal drug, especially the way we drank it. Re labelling, and Molly might have something to say on this, i agree in many ways that i don't necessarily need to label myself an alcoholic every day of the week to stay sober. Would this be damaging in any way to my sobriety? Cool to be able to leave it all behind with a 'that was then, this is me now' attitude, and this is a way i like to think too. But then we have the AA program/fellowship where you go to a meeting and declare you are an alcoholic. I'm not knocking either way of thinking, but having been to geez maybe 14 meetings in 18 days (super intensive for me), i am seeing the benefit of being in a room with similar folk. Though I see wisdom and purpose in the 12 steps, i'm not following the program with sponsor etc. as yet, as i'm taking what i need and leaving the rest. I get useful strategies from these boards, buddhist philosophy, CBT and 3 principles style approach to thinking.

As to the AA powerless theme, i only take that to mean as far as when i've had the 1st drink, yep, i usually am powerless to stop there. As to AA's 'handing your will over to a higher power/god' i like that concept, but despite having asked God/Jesus into my heart like believers suggest, he/she hasn't shown up yet as far as i can tell lol.

I'm starting to become a rap for AA/NA 12 step programs mainly because i see the simple necessity and usefulness for many of us (ok me) in human connection. Human connection can be meetings or any sort of regular positive friendships we can enjoy. I'm babbling and probably not too coherent here in Oz this morning, but i think my point is really about connection. AA meetings are about the best form for me at this stage of sobriety, of regular connection. It also means whilst i don't 100% agree on labelling myself in principle, i am naming a part of who and what i am at this point in the game by attending such meetings. Is this a dilemma for me? Not really right now. It might be down the track. Anyway, dunno if this makes any sense. I suppose the subject is do i agree with labelling myself an alcoholic in recovery forever? Maybe it doesn't label me in total, it is just a part of me that is forever there and i need to remain mindful, but it's not who i identify myself as, cause i'm so much more?

Have a rippa out there.