One Step at a Time - March 2017

[actiongirl46]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Oh Nora, I'm so sorry. This sucks. Stick to your guns, ok?

I love this thread, you guys are so kind and I think you understand what I'm going through because we have all been there. Thank you for your kind comments.

Rusty, if you feel comfortable, along with pauly, I'd like to hear more.

I have been traveling for work and will be home tomorrow. Limited free time and internet time, so sorry for not posting much.

More later! ONWARD - AG

[actiongirl46]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

I know what I forgot! SNOW. Liz . . . wow, we missed it up here. Hang in there!

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

AG - Yes, we understand. We have all been there. :hug:

[Wildflowers]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Nora, I'm sorry your brother is adding frustration on top of frustration. His lack of motivation is more than difficult. Your last comment to him was clear and direct. Your purpose in guiding him is to benefit all of you. Maybe you'll have to treat him like a child and have weekly conversations. Awkward and uncomfortable. Perhaps he is confused about the urgency. Keep reminding him this is about Mom. Can you call other family members to help guide and motivate him? Is there anything else that will motivate him? Seek others to help him visualise the common goal. Objectives to help him reach his part of working together as a team. You come across patient and flexible. Appears that when you get tougher and he feels some fear, it motivates him to get moving. At least it seems he answered back and that he'll start helping more. Next time he gives excuses that other local family aren't available to help, let him know that's unacceptable. He needs to fulfil his part. None of my business, but guessing your power of attorney with your Mom. Maybe if it comes to legal aspects, you can - play that card. I hate putting that way, as this is no game. Hope I haven't offended or upset you. Just trying to brain storm. My brain isn't working at optimum capacity. Have brain fog.

AG, in a few more days, you'll likely feel better. Hope so. Shame for myself is an emotion that is worse then guilt. Painful feelings, that I don't like. Tho, I must deal with them. Have been reading about self compassion and self soothing techniques. May start a thread on it. Offering myself compassion for being human. I don't know if this will help. Here's a site I've read. Overcoming Shame-based Thinking

Ne, I'm sorry I forgot to congratulate you on your time. So big congrats to you!.. I read what happened with your arm. I'm so sorry! :hug: So thankful to hear your done with the poison. We both have been on this road too long. My Dr recently Rx'd baclofen 3xd for severe anxiety. Haven't been taking it as Rx'd only when needed. Also take a beta blocker daily so mixing them is a no no I found out.

Liz, You and hubs are so good at looking out for your Dad. Glad you guys are close by. Also don't get the neighbor's reaction. Hope winter is done for our east coast friends. My kids texted me a pic of a beautiful sunset from sunny AZ. Jelly I am. Well sorta.

Pauly, You are too funny!. Thanks so much for the laughs this morning. Read here early today and appreciate it. Hope your family is well.

Rusty, Hope your home safe!... Please let us know when you have time. I'm sorry how your sister handled your drinking problem back then. Glad you have forgiven her. Sisters can be one of thee best relationships ever.

SK, Hope your able to get rest with all the pain your dealing with. :hug: Hows Peggy?

Waves to everyone.

[Wildflowers]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Forgot to write something about me.

Yesterday AM, cleaned and visited one of our customers homes. Then came home vacumed, floors, laundry, dinner. Still in ankle brace. It was a good day. Even my eyes were doing well. This am got up with hubs at 4:00 am in terrible pain. Gout attack. I can barely walk today. Have taken two Aleve.. My hubs gets a yearly RX of 20 hydrocodone for his back. Have taken five since my injury. I don't want to take any more, as when his back go's out he won't have any. Drinking baking soda in warm water 2nd dose tonight. I guess I'm going to have to call Dr and go on a nasty RX. This started last July and attacks are becoming more frequent. My labs in Jan are on verge of kidney issues. I think since I haven't been drinking it's protein related. The list of foods and supplements to avoid is crazy. But, I'm sober and thankful for Ins. I just hate going to Dr's.

Talked to one of my sweet peas tonight. Her and fiance went on a date, where you put on bunny suits and paint ea in glow & dark room. Had left over clam chowder. First time where it wasn't a complete flop. I don't know why I haven't been able to produce a good batch. Luckily this was edible. Kids are teasing us with beautiful sunset pics. My hubs sent a pic & response. Nice sunset for sure, but what you are lucky enough to be looking at now is what the locals call "liquid sunshine" in the form of a "liquid mudshine". Wished I was as clever, witty and sassy as him. Wait I am sassy. hahaha. Now I feel completely stupid even embarrassed talking about self. Do I post?.............. Ok. Have to remind self to feel comfy with me, no matter what anyone else thinks.

I miss my girls!... But, at least they have sturdy wings and we talk weekly.

Oh & just membered to answer Nora. We have two kitties. My heart couldn't bare the loss of another dog. So rescued a kitty, then two yrs later another one to keep him company when we take an adventure to the great outdoors. When we come back he isn't howling anymore. Weird cause cats are usually loners. Not pack animals like dogs. After ten here so off to bed soon. Hope everyone has restful sleep.

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Morning all.

WF - sure hope you get some relief. Take care of you.

More later. Better get ready for work

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Work-shmerk Nora can't get with it this morning, still don't get why the clocks need to be changed, I was reading a funny blog about it this morning, sorry your brother is being so difficult how annoying! So much to say to everyone but no brain power to do it so I'll just wish us all a happy AF Wednesday

[Rusty]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Good Morning,

I am back home but picked up a stomach bug yesterday.

Liz, AG, WF...I wrote a VERY long post yesterday about the intervention, but forgot to highlight the text to copy and paste it and sure enough, I got bumped off the website and lost it.:cuss: It is really painful for me to talk about, and time consuming...and I really don't want to talk about it right now and I hope you understand. When I have a significant block of down time, I will tell you all about it and I won't leave out any details...I promise. :-)
,
Liz-your sisters will come around....why don't you ask them how they feel? Do you think they are worried you will relapse? That dark cloud will go away the longer they see you are sober, especially during stressful times. That's what turned my family around, I think. They were able to see that I wasn't going to drown myself in a bottle when learning that my mom needed more surgeries. Quite the opposite....when I promised I would show up to help my mom, I did, and I was on time and sober. I was reliable and they needed to see that.

Nora-I am sorry your brother is being so difficult. It sounds like he's clinically depressed....obese, smoker, COPD....he can't feel very well. The only thing that makes him feel better is seeing people who are more miserable than he is...but that is not you, so he is taking it out on you.

WF-I hope you feel better soon! It sounds like you have a wonderful relationship with your daughter and I am so glad.

Big hellos to everyone I missed. Still feeling the effects of the flu so sorry for not addressing everyone.

[techie]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Good morning Nora, Liz, Rusty, AG, WF, SK, Paulyitis, Nursie, Cowboy, and anyone else I missed. Well, missing Mama and K9. This will be my last post till next week. I am competing in the LA Marathon. My goal is to do the best I can. That means crossing the finish line. So, I am taking you all with me in spirit. Have a great St Paddy's day, and I'll see you soon xoxo

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Awesome Techie :heartbeat:

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Ahhh - Rusty :hug: :hug: :hug:

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Awesome Techie!! Bacinabit(like Mama used to say)

[Wildflowers]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

Rusty, I'm sorry your sick!... Hope your flu bug rapidly vanishes. Healing will overtake your body quickly. Sending you virtual home made chicken soup. :hug: Very glad your home safe from that long drive in yucky weather. Sorry about the long, lost post. Had a short one going yest or day before when site went down. Please no pressure about talking about sensitive things. I tend to be very private and don't generally like talking about sensitive things. Heck, sometimes even ordinary things. Agree with your assessment concerning Nora's brother. Probably one reason why she's so patient with him. Understanding first hand about depression. Trying that angle of compassion and understanding helps to a point. Bringing the convo back full circle that this is for Mom.

Pauly, Brain fog going on here as well. Don't understand the whole DST. Tho like it when it's fall back better. The kids in AZ don't deal with DST and they like it much better. Hope your day go's well.

Techie, You will be a great success in your marathon. Just participating is awesome. SIL to be is a marathon runner too. Even when I was younger and fit it wasn't my thing. Have always admired runners. Be safe and stay hydrated. Thank you for the info on Paul Scheele. The Cd's are a bit expensive for my taste at $30 a pop. Didn't read available apps. They must be good or you wouldn't have recommended them. Still considering buying. Appreciate your suggesting them as a way to help us thru your positive experiences.

Nora, I'm sorry if I over did it last night regarding your brother. I felt the anxiousness, anger when you said you were shaking after hanging up. I know this sounds cliche. but eventually this will all work out. I think I may have had a mini heart attack with my brother going thru similar issues. It was much easier cause we all lived in same area. Try and member to breath. Bring the focus of your breath back to your nostrils. :hug: Very glad to hear the kids are looking for a place of their own. Think it will be positive for all of you. Also hope they don't move to far!.. Love that you've been able to provide a home to a few fur babies!.. Almost adopted a puppy, but realized have enough now to care for. Plus our two kitties wouldn't be happy at all. Do miss having a dog. Have always loved animals.

I didn't sleep much at all. Ended up taking my hubs RX with his muscle relaxer at 3:30 AM & ice bag as pain was constant throbbing. I hate these meds as they make me nauseous. Take when only in extreme pain. My youngest reacts the same, but hubs and older girl have positive reaction. My major headache is subsiding on its own. I really hate taking too many NSAID's . Have thought about applying for S.S. benefits, but lots of moolah for attorney and very long waiting list. I'm not sure how I managed in that B2B job for as long as I did. Often feel guilty that I'm not contributing more financially and other wise. Found Techie's quote quite helpful. Thank you. Grateful hubs makes a living that sustains us. Grateful for my life long friend who gives me work. It's not much, but I also enjoy helping people. Fond of our seniour citizens. Going to hobble way into shower and attempt to make dinner. Waiting for call back from Dr's office for some type of RX. Tho doc is out of office, so maybe tom.

I too miss the reg ole time posters here. Love new company as well. Miss Kradle. Think she may be reading sometimes. Read her last entries on this thread. Understand and feel the same to a degree. Still, MWO was always my home and I need to be here, for my sobriety and growth in recovery. Hope her, twins, Mathiew and DH are doing well. Being supported and supporting others strengthens my own recovery. Thank you to everyone for being here.

Hope everyone else is having a good AF day. :heartbeat:

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

So tired this afternoon.. Zzzzz,Rusty,I understand that talking about that time in your life is painful, do you guys ever feel like thinking about the past,good or bad is kind of uncomfortable and almost triggery? I can think about how awful I've felt while drinking,all of the horrible things I did/said but still thinking about it kind if awakens that ugly urge,I'm the kind of person who's rather just put it out of my mind for good and try to move on,NS,has that thread about what you don't miss but I can't contribute cuz I just don't wanna go there,just me I think, Liz,how's the snowfall? AG,we've always been a supportive bunch it helps to be around these wonderful peeps here forgot what else I was gonna touch on,brain dead,Brady needs glasses which really pisses me off cuz a couple of years ago I took him to the Indian clinic and the doc there said that his vision was fine and he probably outgrew his vision problems so now I feel guilty for not listening to him when he said he couldn't see very good damn

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2017

X-post WF,my hubs can't take painkillers either,a few years ago he broke his ankle and lortab made him sick to his stomach and percocet made him itchy so he just drank beers,not a good solution but he doesn't have our affliction so it worked for him at the time,I want another dog too but have a grandpuppy part time and Winslow so I don't want to bite off more than I can chew,however if a stray ever comes into my life again I'll keep it,had a blind one a few years ago with completely white eyes,she creeped everyone out but I loved her still