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One Step at a Time - April 2017

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    Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

    geez-a-loo! I was getting all ready to come on board here with the steppers, and I come to see that the ONE post a good friend of mind made on this thread is over-analyzed to the hilt and I'm ready to run for the hills!

    “I’m trying not to post too much in the Steppers thread, my tough love approach isn’t well received here, but I do want to say something to Liz. I think you’ve proved to yourself Liz that it matters not what hubs and/or Mark think, or how they react, it doesn’t stop you from drinking. I was the same way, drinking, asking for forgiveness, and then secretly hoping and knowing they would get over it. Then try to hide my drinking better, or get in a good string of sober days so that they’ll forgive me yet again when I drink. I was lucky, I didn’t get the ultimatum from Bubba, but I’m sure I eventually would have if I didn’t quit for good.

    So, the next question is, why did you drink last night and what can you do the next time to get through without drinking? The answers you need are inside you, just dig deep enough and you’ll find them! Good for you to come straight back and start over, the only failure there is, is when you quit trying! You can do this, I know you can!”

    I know cowboy called it tough love, but I’m sorry … this is tough love? This is about as gentle as I’ve ever seen anybody here! Framing himself in a similar situation and how he probably would have reacted. Then asking some legit questions to get Liz to think about why the slip happened. That’s tough love? No, I don’t think so. I just don’t get why people are cornering this guy that is legitimately trying to help somebody figure out where and why things went wrong? what the ... ? And there's even some encouragement at the end of his "sermon".

    Cowboy does like to go off on a tangent and get on his soap box from time to time, and readily admits it when he does ... but I've never picked up on a holier than thou attitude, or bossing people around. He happens to give a shit about people, and tries to lend wisdom he's learned by tackling this thing ... what more can anybody do? All any of us can do is speak our own truth. As always, take what works for you and leave the rest. Stop the needless bashing! It becomes none of us.
    "Don't be ashamed of your story. It will inspire others".
    “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

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      Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

      Liz:hug:I am with the wise and lovely Nora...have fun at the shower and do NOT dwell on the fact that you drank. It will put you in a bad place. This is a joyful occasion! We are all so excited and happy for you.

      Glassie:happy2:I love Phil Collins.

      Nora-Smoke From A Distant Fire-LOVED that song! Thank you for all your support re: studying and this course. I appreciate it, you dear person!:heartbeat:
      Last edited by Rusty; April 22, 2017, 04:40 AM.

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        Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

        Nora, I don't remember the first record I bought, but absolutely, no, I don't have it. Hahahaha!!

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          Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

          Liz - as the others have said - just forget about everything that's gone before and have fun. You have a wedding and a grandbaby to look forward to, but more importantly you have children who love you and want you to be part of their lives - that is the best gift anyone can give you.
          There's two ways of looking at the holes in your shoes
          You can dig the ventilation... or you can sing the blues

          I didn't come this far to only come this far.

          Comment


            Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

            Originally posted by abcowboy
            I’m trying not to post too much in the Steppers thread, my tough love approach isn’t well received here, but I do want to say something to Liz. I think you’ve proved to yourself Liz that it matters not what hubs and/or Mark think, or how they react, it doesn’t stop you from drinking. I was the same way, drinking, asking for forgiveness, and then secretly hoping and knowing they would get over it. Then try to hide my drinking better, or get in a good string of sober days so that they’ll forgive me yet again when I drink. I was lucky, I didn’t get the ultimatum from Bubba, but I’m sure I eventually would have if I didn’t quit for good.

            So, the next question is, why did you drink last night and what can you do the next time to get through without drinking? The answers you need are inside you, just dig deep enough and you’ll find them! Good for you to come straight back and start over, the only failure there is, is when you quit trying! You can do this, I know you can!
            I read not one ounce of judgment in that post. Just another person's sharing of their reality (one I could fully relate to) and offer of concern and support.
            Last edited by dill; April 22, 2017, 07:04 AM.
            Dill

            Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

            If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

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              Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

              Hey all,my first record was the"Grease" soundtrack think I was 6 or 7,my babysitter stole it so my mom bought me another and it got stolen too! Glassy,I love Phil Collins too,Rusty that story made me sad,we all know that it takes the person who's in active addiction to finally decide for themselves that they're done,no amount of pushing,pulling or dragging is gonna make them stop until they're ready,I'd have been devastated if my family treated me like shit when I was drinking daily and yep,probably would have jumped in even deeper,they stood by me though and give me support now,its not like they're down my throat on a daily basis about drinking,its more of a something I used to do and dont bring it up but when I have given in its more of a "OK its done move on" I didnt want to keep dwelling on Liz cuz she's done an absolutely amazing job on getting great sober days! She's happy with life sober and I'm sure she'll learn from it what she can do next time(sorry to talk like you're not here Liz haha) if MWO was ran like a my way or the highway site,I'd have left loooong ago like I did Soberrecovery! I can't handle that,I look up to certain people on the site who I can learn from who encourage with grace and compassion,thats all I'm saying on that,I'm enjoying my sober time one step at a time wishing us all a happy AF Saturday (ugh I hafta work!)
              I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

              I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
              Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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                Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                Stepping in to say, Hi, to the steppers.
                Trying to get back on track here.
                My first album was Iron Butterfly, "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida", because, you know that drum solo, Lol. I think I was in fifth or sixth grade. Now you know how old I am, lol.
                Take care all, be kind
                Mr V

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                  Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                  Mr.V! Iron Butterfly. LOL...Yup, I know the drum solo. How are you doing???

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                    Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                    Mr V that was one of my earliest ones too! We appear to be of the same vintage.
                    Last edited by Glass Half Empty; April 22, 2017, 04:47 PM.
                    There's two ways of looking at the holes in your shoes
                    You can dig the ventilation... or you can sing the blues

                    I didn't come this far to only come this far.

                    Comment


                      Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                      Mr V - so great to see you! How are you? Grab on tight and let's do this. :hug:

                      I can't remember my first album. But, I definitely had Bobby Sherman albums, Sonny & Cher, then moved into Queen. Bohemian Rhapsody. I still have many of my 45's. And, I was just sorting out my cd's that I had shoved in the wrong cases. Yep - there is Phil Collins. :rotlf:
                      "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                      ..........
                      AF - 7-27-15

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                        Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                        Been having an uneventful day. Used the outdoor windex and sprayed the windows. They need a good cleaning but this helped a lot. I haven't used water like that in several years. Even though we were told we are out of the drought, I still felt guilty to waste the water! But, at least the water ran into my planters so my plans got a little water.
                        Just doing little bits of this and that. It's been nice not having to deal with anything.

                        I hope that everyone is having a fantastic day. I texted with Liz a little bit this morning and she was excited and happy for the shower. :love:
                        "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                        ..........
                        AF - 7-27-15

                        Comment


                          Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                          Hi Nora...

                          I have been absent from MWO for a few months due to family /work dramas but just wanted to say hi

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                            Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                            Uneventful for me too Nora,work was drama-less but not very busy,didn't feel like cooking dinner so I used a coupon for 2 sourdough jacks from Jack in the box,yikes my stomach is telling me why I rarely eat there haha,is the shower tonight? I hope she posts tons of picsHi Ku ya!
                            Last edited by paulywogg; April 22, 2017, 06:10 PM.
                            I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                            I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                            Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

                            Comment


                              Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                              *Kuya..I swear this spell check is out to get me!
                              I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                              I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                              Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

                              Comment


                                Re: One Step at a Time - April 2017

                                Originally posted by paulywogg View Post
                                *Kuya..I swear this spell check is out to get me!

                                Lol....hi Pauly

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