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    #196
    Re: Paulysville

    you are strong and you are back -- you've been through soooooo much - thanks for being here!

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      #197
      Re: Paulysville

      Dear Pauly--

      I love what NS said - not being perfect doesn't make you a failure.

      You HAVE had so very much going on in your life, and you are resilient. I concur with Rusty - no use beating yourself up - you had a lot going on and needed some help from the rest of your family. I think that is a perfectly normal thing to do.

      I do admire your persistence and self reflection. You ARE a strong woman. I'm glad you came back.

      xoxoxoxoxoxoxox
      Pav

      Comment

        #198
        Re: Paulysville

        I've been thinking of you, too, dear Pauly..and just want to send some more Love your way.. you've been a great support to me here and I've appreciated it so much. Hang in here with us..:hug:

        Comment

          #199
          Re: Paulysville

          Originally posted by paulywogg View Post
          I'll be fine,dammit the only person I hurt is myself, I'm done hurting myself.

          :thumbsup:

          'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

          Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

          Comment

            #200
            Re: Paulysville

            Thinking of you Pauly. You are a treasured asset on here and very valued.

            Sending you hugs. xx
            AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

            Comment

              #201
              Re: Paulysville

              Oh, Pauly, We all wish we could make the pain go away. We can't, and it cuts like a knife. I'm sure losing Jon is like losing one of your own children. The grief is so deep. The fugue state, and drinking is just a means of escape, of protecting oneself. Please don't feel guilty for not always being there for him, you have your own life to live and you must live it, the best way you know how. Were all imperfect, every single one of us. You are a strong woman, and I believe you will find your way through this as well. Sending love and strength your way.

              Comment

                #202
                Tool box - My Way Out Forums
                https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?t=24253&p=1263023&viewfull=1#post1263023
                Here is a list of tools that have helped me maintain my sobriety. This is short and incomplete, help us all out and add your sobriety tools to the list. Make a written list, write down: The reason/s you want to be al free. How bad physically and mentally you feel after an adventure with al. (be graphic) A list of your
                Quitting and staying quit isn't easy, its learning a whole new way of thinking. It's accepting a new way of life, and not just accepting it, embracing it...
                Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. Just get through today. Tomorrow will look after itself when it becomes today, because today is all we have to think about.
                Friendship is not about how many friends you have or who you've known the longest. It's about who walked into your life, said "I'm here for you", and proved it.

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                  #203
                  Re: Paulysville

                  Thank you all for the posts,,I know I sound like a broken record on here,I've never lost a family member I was close to really, my gamma and gramps passed,in laws passed but they were old and sick so there was some preparation, I'm so angry at myself cuz I REFUSED to drink when this all happened! I felt like it would be destroying Jon's memory, then my dad is sick and I still wonder if Jon knew and maybe it pushed his depression further,who knows and with my track record I'm sure if it wasn't going through this something else would have been an excuse to drink,how defeated I feel right now.
                  I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                  I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                  Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

                  Comment

                    #204
                    Re: Paulysville

                    Hey my dear friend. You are NOT defeated. You may FEEL defeated at the moment. But, you are a remarkable woman. Give yourself a big hug from me to you. :hug:
                    "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                    ..........
                    AF - 7-27-15

                    Comment

                      #205
                      Re: Paulysville

                      Thinking of you, Pauly. We love you. xo
                      Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

                      Comment

                        #206
                        Re: Paulysville

                        Pauly you are NOT a broken record, or a broken person.

                        You need to start seeing what everyone else sees, a very brave person who keeps pretty much sober in spite of overwhelming odds.

                        I will list them....

                        Poor family background and expected to raise a brother because your own mother wasn't able.

                        Living in vegas....the party capital of the USA (if not the world)

                        A partner that does not take your sobriety seriously.

                        The loss of a grandchild due to infection.

                        The death of a brother due to drugs.

                        You work in hairdressing, using chemicals that are well known to push buttons with alcoholics. There is probably more that I have missed due to absences from here.

                        Please cut yourself some slack and realise there is probably not even ONE person here that has handled problems as many or as overwhelming as you.

                        Yes, you would like continuous abstinence but there are many things we wish for but happiness lies in accepting what is, and what you are is a brave woman who has turned chronic daily drinking into near total sobriety.

                        Sting said it well;

                        "To search for perfection is all very well

                        But to look for heaven is to live here in hell"
                        Last edited by kuya; July 15, 2017, 07:14 PM.

                        Comment

                          #207
                          Re: Paulysville

                          Fantastic points, kuya! Ditto everything -- Pauly, I hope you feel the hugs, and will hug yourself too. Keep at it... sending you lots of light --

                          Comment

                            #208
                            Re: Paulysville

                            Hey Pauly - how are things going today? I've been thinking of you
                            "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                            ..........
                            AF - 7-27-15

                            Comment

                              #209
                              Re: Paulysville

                              I'm missing your presence here! Hope you're ok, Pauly..

                              Comment

                                #210
                                Re: Paulysville

                                Hey, Pauly. Sending hugs your way.

                                xo

                                Comment

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