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Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

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    Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

    Good morning Army!!!

    Great to see you KTAB - us wimmen do worry when someone goes AWOL.

    Rusty - good job on getting through that. It's not always easy.

    What Molly says is so true about being alone and no one knowing if we drink - how easy it is to just give in, but when surrounded by other people who are drinking the "F-it" factor can come into play as well. Aw heck, they're all drinking so I'll have one too. That and the deprivation factor. What we have to get our heads around - IMVHO - is that we do not and cannot drink like normal people so we have to accept that and know that we are not being deprived if we don't drink, instead, we are doing something good for ourselves. It would be wonderful if all of us had support groups and were able to go to detox centres and get the counseling we need and get the "tools" we need to get our brains to rethink the whole AL thing. It is as complicated as it is simple, again IMVHO. I do not drink. Four simple words we tell ourselves and others that reinforce our decision to stay sober and inform others of our commitment, even if they don't know what that means. There are so many things involved in getting and staying sober but I think a couple of them are acceptance and forgiveness. We have to accept the fact that we cannot drink and forgive ourselves for the mistakes/stumbles we've made in the past and keep on pushing forward. We have to learn to like ourselves. Molly, as most of us, I'm sure, looked in the mirror and hated what she saw. I've done the same hundreds of times - not while drinking, but the next morning after yet another drunken blackout. When you stop drinking you look in the mirror and slowly but surely, you see a different person emerging - a person you can learn to like and love. That person has to come first no matter what. The saying- you have to care for yourself in order to care for others is so true and applies 100% to us. I know I talk about myself and tend to ramble on and on but the truth is that I've been through a lot - the nightmare of years of drinking, a marriage gone bad, total lack of communication with my husband and so much disappointment in myself that I wasn't strong enough to quit and stay sober and regrets that I wasn't always there for my kids when I should have been. When you finally make that decision - that life-changing decision - to get and stay sober, so many things turn around. Layers of guilt, disappointment, anger, and many other feelings and emotions, start to peel away slowly and a new us comes through. Our life may not change, but we do, drastically. I am what Molly's signature says - content, in spite of my life being in an uproar at this time. I am content in my sobriety, content with my work, content with my friends. Most of all, I like myself. I don't care if others like me or not. It really doesn't matter to me. I am who I am and I know who I am. Sobriety has given me that. I walk taller, I think clearer, I love life in spite of and with the struggles it brings. Because now I can not only deal with the hard times, I can appreciate the good things life has to offer as well. Sobriety gives us that - and an inner peace we never, ever had when drinking.

    Wishing you all a great day!!

    Did I read right that JackieClaire is not only 8 year sober but off the smokes as well? JC you ROCK!! inkele:
    For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
    AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

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      Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

      Morning Cirly Wirly Stirly Girly,
      Yep 4 months of the fags today. I'm using a e-cig now and again so can't say I'm nicotine free.......but most of my terrible breathlessness has gone...........and I walk miles.
      It could be worse, I could be filing.
      AF since 7/7/2009

      Comment


        Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

        God morning army! What inspiring posts! Thank you everyone. Jackie - congratulations! Stirly - very deep and so on point! What's IMVO? I think I agree with simply not going to Booz ups. It's always about convincing myself that I'm not deprived of I don't have a drink. I've made a choice to have something else. To protect THAT person as Stirly says. In other news, my sons counsellor tells me he's decided to do the counseling course!! I'm so proud of him!! Have a great AF Saturday folks! Bless.

        Comment


          Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

          Originally posted by JackieClaire View Post
          Morning Cirly Wirly Stirly Girly,
          Yep 4 months of the fags today. I'm using a e-cig now and again so can't say I'm nicotine free.......but most of my terrible breathlessness has gone...........and I walk miles.
          Jackie - that is fantastic news!! Mr. Stirly has been using an e-cigarette since the end of last summer but I see him slowly but surely going back to smoking his cigarillos again. I don't think he ever really convinced himself to stop smoking - just substituted one kind of smoke for another. Hopefully he will go back to just the e-cigarette cause he had gotten it down to the zero nicotine level. Good for you tho' - just the fact that your breathlessness has gone is such a huge improvement. Keep up the good work!!

          Hiya Martha!!
          For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
          AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

          Comment


            Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

            Afternoon..
            Well done on 4 months too JC!
            On the temptations in early sobriety, a big one for me would be being left on my own!
            Mr M didn't exactly curb his glasses of wine, but it wasn't in my face. Still, it wasn't easy at the time. Funny, as time goes on, he drinks less and less. I used to tell myself that he was the bad influence.. wrong way around!
            I had to get over the social side.. tricky moments, but I wasn't a big drinker in public. Mollys description of the bottle in the bedroom is closer to my reality back then.

            [MENTION=11158]stirly-girly[/MENTION], well said as always!!
            Last edited by IamMary; July 8, 2017, 08:27 AM.
            AF - July 19th 2015 :happy2:

            Comment


              Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

              Very late check in some fabulous posts today-- JC off the cigs Well done you must feel great especially with the walking without being out of breath.
              Overheard this morning while I was doing a 12 mile race "see that woman she is over 70" The reply was " That is what you get for living a healthy life with a good diet and no booze or fags" If only they had known. Never to late to turn your life around. After the race everyone decamps to a pub and I have to say I do feel deprived when I head back home.

              Comment


                Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                Evening all. Thanks for the feedback. In an ideal world we who cannot drink alcohol would live in an alcohol free environment but life is not like that and everyone else does not have our problem. Hubby and daughter could have few glasses of wine over dinner last night and one while watching tv and that was it. No sneaky topping up of glasses, having one in the kitchen or while cleaning up. I could drink socially and to a point when with hubby. It was the drinking alone that was soul destroying. Having it in the house definitely lead to my relapses but Alcohol is always there and I can't expect everyone else to give it up. I need to change my mindset.

                To quote Stirly "What we have to get our heads around - IMVHO - is that we do not and cannot drink like normal people so we have to accept that and know that we are not being deprived if we don't drink, instead, we are doing something good for ourselves. It would be wonderful if all of us had support groups and were able to go to detox centres and get the counseling we need and get the "tools" we need to get our brains to rethink the whole AL thing. It is as complicated as it is simple, again IMVHO."

                That sums it up exactly and it is what I am now working on. Feel different this time but early days. Will keep checking in and making myself accountable. Day 20 today.

                Comment


                  Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                  Thank you for these wonderful posts! Exactly what has been going thru my mind. Stirly - I've had the same 'discovery'. Happiness in life again, I guess you could call it. Things aren't all perfect by any means of the imagination. Oh - but life is wonderful. :heartbeat:
                  "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                  ..........
                  AF - 7-27-15

                  Comment


                    Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                    Well this little rock chick is all gussied up and ready to partay.............might be back dead late like oooooooooooh 11:30pm..............I'm that wild.
                    It could be worse, I could be filing.
                    AF since 7/7/2009

                    Comment


                      Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                      Honeys I'm home..........thanks for leaving the door off the latch. Couldn't half do with a cup of tea and a few biscuits.
                      Had three lemonades............I'll be up half the night piddling.
                      It could be worse, I could be filing.
                      AF since 7/7/2009

                      Comment


                        Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                        Originally posted by mollyka
                        Morning - bit early but doing my nigella impressions today - all the little darlinks coming for lunch - and hopalong is feck all use :-((((
                        Good morning Molly and all to come. BBQ, did one last night and was lovely. Bit cloudy but not raining and very mild. Lovely to have them all around but can survive if they are not and hell of a lot less work. Glad you enjoyed your night JC. I have a summer crochet project, granny squares (70 of them) for a Christmas quilt. Only 50 more to go! Great for keeping me occupied at night and sat outside yesterday doing a few.

                        Think I'll go to the gym this morning and practice on the stepper. Have a great Sunday everyone.

                        Comment


                          Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                          Good morning Army and a Happy Sunday to all!!

                          Got back into sewing after I got sober - now have a wardrobe full of very smart, one-of-a-kind outfits and love it!! Saw two of my Grandbabies yesterday - the boys - and today is a day for ME - off to da beach to finally get some colour.

                          Wishing you all a day full of sunshine and smiles and a wink of the eye!!:flowerspin:ink::hoopup::flowerspop:
                          For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
                          AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

                          Comment


                            Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                            Good morning loverlies.

                            I took up cross stitching again once I got sober...........trouble before was that my hands were so shaky at times I couldn't thread the needles or I was so hammered I couldn't see the pattern............

                            I'd love to learn how to crochet. I have watched many how to videos and it just doesn't seem possible to me.

                            Molls,can Joe not sit and peel the veg.
                            It could be worse, I could be filing.
                            AF since 7/7/2009

                            Comment


                              Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                              Morning..
                              I'd love to learn crochet too... thought I'd have all this spare time on my hands but that never going to happen when the kids at the age they are at. My routine of doing all the jobs in the evening with a glass of wine was replaced by listening to an audio book.. sounds silly but it somewhow filled the gap, or distracted me maybe. Whatever works!

                              Suns trying to shine again, we're off for a cycle.. enjoy the gang Molls. Hope you don't have a lemonade hangover JC, how was the gig?
                              Rusto, enjoy the sunshine! And the beach Stirly!!
                              AF - July 19th 2015 :happy2:

                              Comment


                                Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-July 2017

                                Originally posted by stirly-girly View Post
                                Good morning Army!!!

                                Great to see you KTAB - us wimmen do worry when someone goes AWOL.

                                Rusty - good job on getting through that. It's not always easy.

                                What Molly says is so true about being alone and no one knowing if we drink - how easy it is to just give in, but when surrounded by other people who are drinking the "F-it" factor can come into play as well. Aw heck, they're all drinking so I'll have one too. That and the deprivation factor. What we have to get our heads around - IMVHO - is that we do not and cannot drink like normal people so we have to accept that and know that we are not being deprived if we don't drink, instead, we are doing something good for ourselves. It would be wonderful if all of us had support groups and were able to go to detox centres and get the counseling we need and get the "tools" we need to get our brains to rethink the whole AL thing. It is as complicated as it is simple, again IMVHO. I do not drink. Four simple words we tell ourselves and others that reinforce our decision to stay sober and inform others of our commitment, even if they don't know what that means. There are so many things involved in getting and staying sober but I think a couple of them are acceptance and forgiveness. We have to accept the fact that we cannot drink and forgive ourselves for the mistakes/stumbles we've made in the past and keep on pushing forward. We have to learn to like ourselves. Molly, as most of us, I'm sure, looked in the mirror and hated what she saw. I've done the same hundreds of times - not while drinking, but the next morning after yet another drunken blackout. When you stop drinking you look in the mirror and slowly but surely, you see a different person emerging - a person you can learn to like and love. That person has to come first no matter what. The saying- you have to care for yourself in order to care for others is so true and applies 100% to us. I know I talk about myself and tend to ramble on and on but the truth is that I've been through a lot - the nightmare of years of drinking, a marriage gone bad, total lack of communication with my husband and so much disappointment in myself that I wasn't strong enough to quit and stay sober and regrets that I wasn't always there for my kids when I should have been. When you finally make that decision - that life-changing decision - to get and stay sober, so many things turn around. Layers of guilt, disappointment, anger, and many other feelings and emotions, start to peel away slowly and a new us comes through. Our life may not change, but we do, drastically. I am what Molly's signature says - content, in spite of my life being in an uproar at this time. I am content in my sobriety, content with my work, content with my friends. Most of all, I like myself. I don't care if others like me or not. It really doesn't matter to me. I am who I am and I know who I am. Sobriety has given me that. I walk taller, I think clearer, I love life in spite of and with the struggles it brings. Because now I can not only deal with the hard times, I can appreciate the good things life has to offer as well. Sobriety gives us that - and an inner peace we never, ever had when drinking.

                                Wishing you all a great day!!

                                Did I read right that JackieClaire is not only 8 year sober but off the smokes as well? JC you ROCK!! inkele:
                                Terrific post Stirly, right from the heart. It still amazes me how much deep down we are all so alike here. I guess that's what abusing an addictive substance does to us.
                                Ethanol is a toxic chemical, why would I drink it?

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