Day 20-My Birthday-GF coming home

[Seeker1]

Hi all. I have been learning a lot going through old posts and am glad I found this place, thanks for being here. I am on day 20, with a goal of total abs. I want this to be my Last and Final Quit (LAFQ). Today is my birthday and I want this next year to be one of recovery. My GF travels for her job and sometimes we don't see each other for 2-3 weeks. She will be home tomorrow and it will be our first face to face since I ruined the Christmas/New Years plans of those I love the most. I am lucky because she has stuck by me, even after all the hurt and pain I have caused her over the years with my drinking. We have been talking a lot so hopefully we can move forward. I am very anxious, I call it mini panic attacks that last all day. Haven't been sleeping well at all. I know it will pass with time but it really is no fun. Why do we do this to ourselves? Anyway, I am confident, yet still feel some apprehensions, but am so ready to have this monkey finally off my back. Thank you all for being here...

[JackieClaire]

Re: Day 20-My Birthday-GF coming home

[MENTION=24107]Seeker1[/MENTION].........we haven't met yet so :welcome:and good job on those 20 days.........21 days when you GF gets home.

A little planning won't go amiss.............perhaps a nice meal. Gives you a chance to do a bit of sober cooking. I spent years one hand cooking as the other hand had a glass in it so get some practice at two handed cooking

And you'll have loads of things to talk about..........tell her what you're doing to get and stay sober, involve in her in your sobriety, make your apologies, research and make plans to do sober stuff together.Is she willing not to drink around you in these first important weeks?

Have a lovely weekend.

[Seeker1]

Re: Day 20-My Birthday-GF coming home

Thank you so much JackieClaire for the sage advice. The house is spic and span, I try to keep the house orderly. A meal is a great idea, one she likes a lot so I will get out steaks and peas and baked potato's and baked beans and milk with pie for dessert. She is disappointed but she does support me. She will be willing not to drink around me these next weeks. She is not much of a drinker anyway which is a good thing for both of us. I have actually put together a few articles on enhancing your relationships and hopefully we can go through them together and pick out things to do together to get us closer. I have really messed things up, I have thought long and hard about our lives, my life, her life. I thought I was strong and I wasn't as strong as I thought I was. I am so sick and tired of always having to pick up the pieces after I have a slip. Thank you for letting me vent, I don't know how I got on before I found this group!

[Pavati]

Re: Day 20-My Birthday-GF coming home

Happy Birthday, Seeker. I am looking forward to hearing how the dinner went! Engaging your partner in a meaningful way is a great idea.

Pav