Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

[satz123]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

As Ma-in-Law's a wee bit frail ...........I'm off to see if I can get her some kind of indoor plants she can look after.........she misses gardening so much.

Yes Jacks - I love house plants
I think if you can look after a plant and keep it alive it does the soul good.
Just heard yesterday they are great for keeping airborne house dust / mites in control - go figure. Apparently something in the plant makes the dust fall to the floor.
Think I need to investigate that further :haha:

[RunningCourage]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Yes Jacks - I love house plants
I think if you can look after a plant and keep it alive it does the soul good.
Just heard yesterday they are great for keeping airborne house dust / mites in control - go figure. Apparently something in the plant makes the dust fall to the floor.
Think I need to investigate that further :haha:

... Wish I could look after plants. Am getting better. NEVER will own a plant that needs watering more than once a week, cos i end up just killing them through thirst. Cacti are good :thumbsup:

Evening folks. Well, that was the very last day for kids in one of the schools I teach in. A Special assembly with lots of tears (and lots of young wanes trying to squeeze tears from very dry faces... hate this, but they're kids and suppose kinda get it!). Not actually teaching again until a week Monday... but gotta pack and move over the next week, which part of me thinks/fears is actually gonna be more stressful than teaching and teaching would be preferable...
[MENTION=7008]JackieClaire[/MENTION] - that is a very thoughtful gesture. My dad now does a lot less gardening - growing veg - now he's a bit older/not the same energy. But indoor plants aint his thing... so he hangs out at the local cheese shop and delicatessen, buys the choicest goodies only for his darling wife to complain they don't need more cheese and meat. Needless to say (this being my dad) the cheese is eaten pretty quick... and the meat is soon used in an unplanned/unscheduled dinner.

Out tonight - back at the singing group. Never want to go - simply cos it's on so late for me - usually finishes at 10pm, which, on any other night I am either a) asleep in bed or b) reading in bed about to go to sleep. That's that bad habit of early morning runs for you... Now, if school started a bit later, how much better would that be?! But I do go - cos I should, I think, cos otherwise I wouldn't meet people outside of work. Ever.

Hope you've all had a good day.

[NoSugar]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

I've been a little leery about posting here with a contrary view, [MENTION=9094]satz123[/MENTION], but it sounds like you want to consider all options so I'll take the chance and hope that you and others take it in the spirit I'm trying to offer it, with love and concern.

It is completely reasonable that Mr S can continue to drink alcohol even though you and your son cannot. However, if your home is the "recovery house", I think it should be alcohol-free and that Mr S should drink elsewhere for now. The recovery environment has to be set up for success. @tonyniceday has commented a few times that being in an AF home with a supportive, non-drinking friend has made a huge difference this time. Getting all alcohol OUT of the house is standard advice when a person is trying to quit. It needs to be impossible (or at least as hard as possible) for your son to access his poison.

If this were a porno addiction, I doubt that copies of Playboy and Penthouse would be left lying around your home to tempt him and remind him that he's not "normal" in his response. Seeing his dad able to drink and having access to his alcohol may set him up to fail again and again.

You and your family are in my thoughts, Satz, and each time I sign on to MWO I hope to find a post from you saying that your boy is seeing things differently now. There can always be hope that he will. xx, NS

[satz123]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Thank you NS for taking the time to post & of course I am open to all advice and yours is always welcome :hug:

There is no alcohol in the house as MrS does not drink at home. Left over beer from Christmas was moved to an outhouse and he found that just last week.
Mr S will go to the local club and when he comes home it is clear he's been drinking.
I've had to accept that in recovery - so I expected young Satz to do the same.
In fact I LIKE to see drunk people - it makes me more aware of what I'm NOT missing. But then I'm warped.

Mr S drinks only when he is out socialising - can stop at 2 if necessary and come home. - that is why there can be no comparison.
Young Satz drinks alcoholically - alone in pubs but also in secret at home with the hiding of bottles etc.

[NoSugar]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Well, Satz, it sounds like you've done what you can in that department, then. It's not reasonable for an addict to expect others, even his dad, to abstain entirely for his benefit. People drink. That's life and we all either deal with it or change entirely who we socialize with. I'd have zero friends, I'm sad to say. I'm very fortunate, though, that most of my family don't drink at all or very rarely.

Is he relying on your for financial support? If so, his ability to purchase alcohol could be restricted to some extent at least. But as we all know, he isn't going to truly be free, even if he isn't actually drinking, until he's ready. And dry drunks rarely stay sober. I hope he can somehow come to want it more than he thinks he needs to drink. xx

[IamMary]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

hi All,

Was just thinking about the financial bit too NS.. but then as you say, and Molly wrote about it the other day, if your not ready to do everything in your power to quit, its not really going to happen.
Mr M has a drink at home, beer at the weekend. He didnt go out of his way to curb his drinking when I quit (another story).. but I was so desperate at that point, and stubborn, I stuck with it despite him I think. I suppose the more your want it, the more successful you will be, whatever your environment - but yes, waving it in your face wont help.

93!! What a fabulous age [MENTION=7008]JackieClaire[/MENTION]..
Can't do house plants either... one of the kids is great though.

[IamMary]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Another Jackeen here [MENTION=24080]Jude58[/MENTION].. But visit Galway a lot, family there.
Small island, big families, one of us is likely to be related to your cousins

[JackieClaire]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Popping in to say night night. Just sat for more than hour watching youtube instructions for making granny squares................I've decided to take up quantum physics or translating Egyption hieroglyphics.......it got to be easier.
Lovely to see you as always, Sugarbabe.
I have a good few succlents and cactus...........love the little blighters and don't half feel chuffed when one of them flowers and the mother of thousands is amazing.

[tonyniceday]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Morning troops!

Just a quick fly by on way out to work...late shift yesterday and early today... will read back and be back later

[JackieClaire]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Morning,
The S&H has a meeting with his company's human resources today. Keep your fingers crossed he gets either a large redundancy or another outlet.
Off to work now.
Tony, don't know how you manage with the those shifts.

[mollyka]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Morning all - work hard Tony and jacks - the hotel industries hours are demanding alright aren't they! Keeps you off the streets tho as they say in these parts ;-)

[RunningCourage]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

morning troopers,

happy work day tony and JC.

sleep's an odd thing. despite being late to bed - cos out with me singing group - i kept on waking up during the night and awoke at the same time (i.e. ridiculously early) as normal. Would be surprised if I got 4 hrs kip! Upside is that there's no kids to teach. Downside is that this usually means the day draaaaaaaaaggggggggsssss... :haha:

Right, better get out there. Have a good day folks.

[rustop59]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Morning all, another one rushing out the door to get shopping as have visitors coming. It’s starting the Granny squares that’s difficult JC, I still have to go back to YouTube but once you get going it’s grand. Fingers crossed for your son. Have a nana nap RC, it will keep you going. Will check in later.

[Jude58]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

Another Jackeen here [MENTION=24080]Jude58[/MENTION].. But visit Galway a lot, family there.
Small island, big families, one of us is likely to be related to your cousins

Mary.....my grandfather, Patrick O'Byrne, was from Killybegs, as were the cousins (Gillespies). Some now live in Galway as well. I have never been to Ireland, but it's on my bucket list to do so!

[satz123]

Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018

I have never been to Ireland, but it's on my bucket list to do so!

Only if we can all go over to NY to visit :haha:
We have our own transport - Jacks can drive