Re: Join the Army Against Alcohol-February 2018
I started to overthink this.....I'm going to try and keep it simple......it is the power of addiction............there's absolutely no rhyme or reason to it. Just as each of us have our own unique DNA (unless you're an identical twin or triplet).........we each have our own way of why, when and how our socialising turned to addiction. I work with a lad who's primary addiction was heroin and later alcohol when he couldn't score...........he calls alcoholism the lazy addiction (with his tongue firmly in his cheek) as we can just pop down the shop get a few bottles in and don't have to go crawling round back alleys in the middle of the night.
I look back to mine and it was anxiety..........social and any other blessed thing I could get anxious about. It began before I started infant school...........it was the not knowing what of what will come. Fast forward to 14/15 getting a bit of pocket money............then its a cheap bottle of cider shared with a friend.........standing outside the off licence begging an adult to bring you a bottle out. I used to get awfully sick and swear off until the next time.
I always drank to get drunk...........and I distinctly remember the first time I had a drink after a bit of a trauma. I'd been to an Aunt's and was driving the kids home and someone drove into me passenger side door......kids in the back.......the kids were fine and thought it was an adventure...........not a lot of damage........but the shock and anxiety and anger somehow got me home. We had some sherry in the house and a swigged some out of the bottle..........and all of a sudden the waves stopped............now this is where the addicition kicked in..............if one swig was good, then two would even better..........and by god by the end of the bottle I was feeling no pain at all...
You know that's the first time I've realised that this kicked off long before my Dad died...........it escalated beyond being able to cope with drink and everyday living after but I'd always thought that's when I became an out and out alkie.............the seeds had been sown.
There's prolly more but got to get ready for Ma-in-Law's party.
I started to overthink this.....I'm going to try and keep it simple......it is the power of addiction............there's absolutely no rhyme or reason to it. Just as each of us have our own unique DNA (unless you're an identical twin or triplet).........we each have our own way of why, when and how our socialising turned to addiction. I work with a lad who's primary addiction was heroin and later alcohol when he couldn't score...........he calls alcoholism the lazy addiction (with his tongue firmly in his cheek) as we can just pop down the shop get a few bottles in and don't have to go crawling round back alleys in the middle of the night.
I look back to mine and it was anxiety..........social and any other blessed thing I could get anxious about. It began before I started infant school...........it was the not knowing what of what will come. Fast forward to 14/15 getting a bit of pocket money............then its a cheap bottle of cider shared with a friend.........standing outside the off licence begging an adult to bring you a bottle out. I used to get awfully sick and swear off until the next time.
I always drank to get drunk...........and I distinctly remember the first time I had a drink after a bit of a trauma. I'd been to an Aunt's and was driving the kids home and someone drove into me passenger side door......kids in the back.......the kids were fine and thought it was an adventure...........not a lot of damage........but the shock and anxiety and anger somehow got me home. We had some sherry in the house and a swigged some out of the bottle..........and all of a sudden the waves stopped............now this is where the addicition kicked in..............if one swig was good, then two would even better..........and by god by the end of the bottle I was feeling no pain at all...
You know that's the first time I've realised that this kicked off long before my Dad died...........it escalated beyond being able to cope with drink and everyday living after but I'd always thought that's when I became an out and out alkie.............the seeds had been sown.
There's prolly more but got to get ready for Ma-in-Law's party.
) :hug: 
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