One Step at a Time - May 2018

[NoSugar]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Nora, beer in a baby bottle is a "kill the thrill" image if I ever heard one :haha:! It probably will be a fun game but I must admit, it seemed odd to me when alcohol began to be served at BABY showers - the guest of honor can't even participate (or would be very harshly judged if she did!). That wasn't the case, at least around here, when I was pregnant >30 years ago. It is part of our "alcohol everywhere" culture and the (mistaken) belief that we can't celebrate or have fun without it. That thinking can change (like it did for smoking) but I don't know what it is going to take to bring us to the tipping point.

Bird, I'm sorry your weekend began the way it did. You can turn it around now and end up feeling good about it (and yourself!). I also have a rather "needy" grown child at the moment. I sometimes feel pretty exasperated but I'm grateful to be strong and healthy enough to be able to give what she needs. This struck me once again when I was driving to go babysit at 5:30 pm last evening. There were years when I could not possibly have done that at the spur of the moment and if it had been planned, I would have been physically uncomfortable and full of resentment. Alcohol probably felt like your friend last night but once the break up is final, I promise you'll see how much it was stealing from you and holding you back. I hope your daughter is open to getting healthier, too. Take care, NS

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Morning friends,NS,I think it's just how it is these days with al being everywhere,I've never been to a baby shower where there wasn't alcohol,except the one I threw and I think people were irritated there wasn't any,plus it's usually co-ed these days so the men want their beers,Bird,I took have a needy adult kid but at least I can try to be there for her as much as i can work for just a few hours this morning then whatching the boys where the REAL work begins,waves to Nora,Liz,Rusty and Glassy,Techie,hope we all have a great AF Saturday!

[Rusty]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Good Afternoon, Friends,

Nora-beer in baby bottles??? Ummm...ew...all I can think of is curdled baby formula. Haha!

I'm in a bit of a low mood so I came here to write before I go to the gym. I am hoping an intense workout lifts my mood. The reason I am feeling blue is because I asked my mom a couple of weeks ago if she was lonely living at the assisted-living facility and she said no. I was so relieved! Then, yesterday, my sister told me that she got the strong impression that mom was lonely. My sister spends several hours a day with my mom so she would have a more true impression than I would, as I only see my mom once a week. I think Mom doesn't want me to worry about her so when I do see her, she puts on on her "game face" so that I won't be sad. My sister's gut feelings and impressions of people are NEVER wrong, and it makes me feel SO badly that my mom is lonely and bored. My sister said that Mom doesn't get involved in the activities there anymore.:sad::sad:

Pauly-you're right...taking care of two little boys is WAY harder than going to your job. LOL

Sorry this post is all about me today. This, too, shall pass. No, I don't feel like drinking and I am grateful for that.:happy2:

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Oh friends.............:sad:

Rusty - I am really sad to hear that your Mom is lonely. I was hoping that there would be so much going on around there that it would give her plenty of activities. Maybe you can get your mom to share with you tomorrow when you go over. :hug:

Bird - I am sorry about your daughter. Yep- you know it - beer isn't the answer. It just makes us feel more guilty and bad about ourselves.

NS - you always have such great posts. Thank you.

Pauly - your grandsons are cuties but you have your hands full.

Liz - how are things going? Is Logan starting to walk?????

I'm so grateful that I have you all in my life. Thank you for being here. I'm sorry that we all had to thru the alcohol nightmare to meet but I am so grateful. :heartbeat:

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Bird - sending you good thoughts today. I hope that today was a better day.

[Lizann]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Hello everyone. Sorry for not posting but I have been super busy. All is well here though and I've had a good few days.

Rusty, I am so sorry that you are sad! Yes, if they're not happy, we're not happy. One of the things we discussed with the social worker yesterday was aclimating to these new environments. It's not easy. Is there anything she likes to do. My mom loves to read. I give her all my magazines when I'm done reading them. She especially likes readers digest. What about like word search or crossword puzzles, coloring. Can you bring her some pretty plants she can keep in her room. My parents have bird houses in the yard, they find entertaining. Erin has a bird feeder outside one of her Windows. I also find that taking action steps toward helping mom and dad has helped my anxiety and depression about the situation, for now anyway. Just some thoughts I had.
Nora, you are so smart to post here about the shower and alcohol. I would be uncomfortable too! Is it a coed baby shower? I let Erin's in laws handle the drinks at Erin's shower. If you want alcohol, you bring it, take it back with you. Most of my people don't drink anyway.
Bird so sorry about the rough weekend. There are times when the kids can bring us to our knees. I love them to pieces but it isn't always easy. Pick up the pieces and move on. Glad your not drinking today!
Pauly, yes chasing after these little ones is exhausting, but they are so much fun! Logan is getting shy now and I gotta tell you I kinda love it. My older sister came over yesterday and he was clinging to me. Greatest feeling in the world:heartbeat:
So we spoke to the social worker and are looking into several options. First order is to get him into a geriatric psychiatrist to make sure we have the best possible combo of Meds for him. Hoping we can make some adjustments there especially to help when he is agitated. We will look for an elder attorney to help us make sure that whatever happens to dad, there will be enough money left to take care of mom too. Long list of things to look into for help with him. I felt better when I left, because I feel like I'm doing something to help them, there is a care fair close by here tomorrow that we will be attending.
Work was so busy today, spring and pollen have arrived! Helped out at the church car wash after work. Then I went shopping with erin. Haven't done that in a long time and we had such a good time. Left Logan with hubby and Mark. Face time with CJ and she and Joe are doing a lot of work on the house. I think they want it nice for when we come. I really can't wait to see her!
Well that's what's going on here. I am tired, but a good tired.
Wishing you all a quiet AF night!

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Liz - your post made me happy. Those are really positive steps you are taking with your parents. Plus, you are just living your life and enjoying the moments. :heartbeat:

[bird]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Hi all,
Much better today and heading home around lunch. Put in a bid on a place yest and they accepted it, so the kids are very excited that I will be living nearby. ....dd1 got a migraine last night. Her apt (dorm) was a mess and I cleaned and helped pack till I was ready to drop. DD2 and her bf came and helped. Later dd2 called and said she used to be mad at dd1 for having so many problems, but now she feels compassion toward her. I knew she was angry, and so glad for the change. Brought a tear to my eye......can't wait to get home and see the cats. Still have a lot of moving to get dd1 out this morn. DD2 coming to help again...Rusty:hug:...Lizann, sounds like you are getting things going.....gotta get....hugs to all..and I too am very thankful for this place to talk and have some friends....b

[Lizann]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Good morning and happy Sunday! Raining here today, you know, because we all just had our cars washed.! Off to church then lunch with the kids. Will meet my sisters at the university center for the care fair. Mom said it was "lively" at her house, but wouldn't expand on that. That means dad is acting up. Don't think I mentioned but he insisted on going up a ladder and trimming some tree branches the other day:egad: [MENTION=2634]bird[/MENTION], how exciting, I hope it all works out. I know you'll keep us posted. What made you decide this was the one? Details please?
Have a great day guys. I haven't mentioned it in awhile, but I so appreciate your friendship and support! Love you all

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Morning friends,Rusty,I'm sorry your mom is lonelyI took thought she was thriving living there,I wonder if she has some depression? Maybe that's why she won't participate in the activities? I dunno just a thought,Liz,glad you had a great day yesterday,sorry about the rain on your freshly washed cars,happens all the time it seems,Nora,yikes your childhood bangs cracked me up haha Bird,excellent news on the house,keep us posted,off to our weekly breakfast,,,see where we end up,much love to all have a great al free day!

[Glass Half Empty]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Hey all

I’m so sorry to hear about the parent troubles. OMG Liz – your Dad up a ladder!! That’s such a worry. I don’t know what’s ahead with mine, but at 84 and 82 I know there will be something, and probably not too far away. It makes me very sad to think about it.

Bird – good news about the house. It’s lovely that you’ll be near to your kids.

Nora – here in Oz beer drinking is practically our national pastime, but the baby bottle game sounds weird even to me. But I don’t think we play games so much at our baby showers any more. I don’t know why, perhaps because people are older when they have kids these days? We tend to either have a really elegant, girls only, high tea, or if they’re really social a big party like the “Babycue” my eldest had. Definitely no games though.

It’s Mothers’ Day next week and Son #2 will be away on an army exercise so they took me out to breakfast yesterday. Son #1 is currently in the middle of the jungle in Myanmar but my DIL and HRH came too, so that was lovely. I sometimes think that perhaps I shouldn't have encouraged my kids to be quite SO adventurous!

Have to zoom back to my studies. nthego:

Bye for now

:upsidedown:

EDIT: Oh – and something funny. We were talking about the wedding plans for October yesterday and Son #2 and his fiancée are planning on having HRH and their best friend’s daughter (who was born on the same day) as flowergirls. Two little girls who will have just turned two! What could possibly go wrong?
:rotlf:

(Should mention - I'm not being awful - they're laughing about the possibilities too!)

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Glassie - so great to hear from you. I think that is going to be the cutest thing having those flower girls.


Quick check in for now. I didn't give Mom one of her pills last night and she is restless.

[bird]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Hi all,
Worked my ass of yest getting dd1 moved out on time and what a great workout that was. It really caught up with me on the way home and I started laughing and couldn't stop. It got so bad I had to pull over. The kids were a bit put out with me :congratulatory:...still really tired but its good. Now to deal with gettin my friends house cleared out, at least I have my girls to help now....as for the place I am buying, I chose it for the price and where it is at. I can play drums loudly and the cats have room to run. Its a small doublewide on 8 acres way out of town. I really wanted a different one(bigger) that I had seen but there was some sort of trouble with the title. Anyway, this one will do....and the price was right...Lizann, that is scary about your Dad and the ladder. Ladders freak me out a bit...Glassie good to hear from you and I had to look up high tea. The flowergirls will be very very cute....off for now...waving to all

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Morning friends,Bird the property sounds great,I'm sure you'll be able to fix it up to suit you and look at the plus of no drunk landlord! Rusty,hope all is well,Nora and Liz hope your weekend was nice,Glassy,that is going to be SO cute having the little ones in the wedding,time to get Monday started,much love and have a wonderful booze free day!

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - May 2018

Hi guys. Happy Monday.
I called in today. Just couldn't go to work. All I can say is thank goodness that we have Mom stable on her current medication. I didn't give her that Seroquel one time and oh my goodness. The day was good - she interacted and was awake. I began second guessing myself on why we were giving her that other pill. Then by late afternoon, she was starting to not make sense, very 'up', and then by bedtime, the delusions. :sad: She wanted Casey. She wanted her little boy. She could not understand that he was at his own home. I showed her a picture I took last week of the 3 of them to show her that he was grown up. She just said it didn't make sense and she needed to figure this out. She wanted to talk to Casey. We tried calling but couldn't get him. I finally video chatted with my niece. (Sadly, I think my niece heard my Mom say no she didn't want to talk to anyone but Casey) Mom, couldn't hear at all, even when I tried putting headphones on her. But, she would ask my niece questions and she would nod or I would yell the answer to my Mom. Sigh......She must have finally fallen asleep because she didn't get up during the night. I have to admit that I'm stressed out.

I'll be back later in a much better mood. I'm not going to waste a day off being glum. :victorious: