August Army Manoevres

[satz123]

Re: August Army Manoevres

I just think it is a great way to encourage people that the situation isn't as hopeless as it often feels, they aren't diseased in the way we commonly define disease, they aren't bad, immoral people, and that by learning new things (not only meditation or new skills but also the types of things we learn from one another here), our brains can learn/be changed in ways so that we no longer need to use that addiction pathway.
.

I have said it before on here and now it has been put into context. I firmly believe I learned new skills from the folks on here.
Just reading & engaging on a regular basis changed how I thought about drink and it's place in my life.

This sounds very simple but ......I can clearly remember being in awe of JC coming into the kitchen having been out & putting on the kettle for a cup of tea. I used to head straight to the wine bottle. I just HAD to do it.
This drip drip drip of learning of lives lived differently eventually had me REALLY wanting that simpler, more content life.

[sweetpea29]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Evening folks

Seems I fell asleep on sofa this evening and just woke about half hour ago. Do hope it don't mess with nights sleep now.

Interesting thoughts from you all and good to read so thanks for putting them out there x

I do believe that each person comes at this from their own unique perspective, taking into account personal makeup/personality, and history and social and cultural setting they are based. We all can learn from each other which is the best thing about this site. How any one of us views or labels our 'problem' is of course up to that individual. Each view/perspective imho is valid and legitimate.

My own personal and strong belief is that I do have a disease, known as alcoholism. The only known cure is not a cure but a means to manage, that is, abstain. I strongly believe for me this disease definitely runs in the genes of my Father's family, so many examples youse would not believe me, it is scary. However, that doesn't mean every single family member has it.
For me this is not an excuse or get-out, it's just reality. Add to that, my personality-shy, socially awkward, lacking confidence and self-esteem and the culture I live where drinking was the 'thing' you did from as early an age as possible, bam you get someone who doesn't know when to or can't stop when starts. Then, somewhere along the line comes realisation, this isn't normal behaviour, this is causing me harm, yet despite repeated attempts you can't stop that effing damaging behaviour
Thank all that's good I stumbled upon this place, (years before I plucked up courage to join btw)

[sweetpea29]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Posted that before finished it folks!

After finding this site I read for hours on end and learnt so, so much from those posting. The Army was a hive of activity back then, Newbies Nest too, the likes of Jacks and Molls, Oney and Starty, Lav and Bryrdie, Ktab, Mario and many more- they all sounded so normal and human and like me and they gave me hope that maybe I could find a way to stop my damaging behaviour, a way out of the hell I was in ...rest is history as they say!

But there's no way I'm cured, nor confident that I will never go back to that behaviour. If anything I'm a little shakey.
Again, back here and I'm learning so much from like of Starts and Bridget. We (me)can't take things for granted....

Anyways folks that wasn't meant to be so long just my perspective!

D'Arsey hope you get some benefit from the new forum you've joined. It can do you no harm and I'm sure it'll be more than beneficial to interact and learn from others who are going through the same things x don't be a stranger here tho x

MrsA just sending thoughts and good vibes your direction x

Pauly good to see you here again x hope you've had a good day😊

To the rest of youse, Molls, Jacks, Sugarbabe, Starts, Satz thanks for sharing your thoughts and getting me thinking x

Time for the leaba but I'm now feckin wide awake will go try and sleep

Nighters x

[IamMary]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Smashing posts here tonight, Im nodding and agreeing with everyone.
I dont know what I am, an alcoholic, someone who's dependent on drink, a daily drinker who like to down a bottle or 2 of wine in the evening and thinks about it for most of the day (but still functions) - now there's an acronym. Doesn't really matter I suppose, because I am a million times happier without drink. I learned how to do that here.
I still have uncomfortable moments, more than Id like, but Ive learned how to deal with them here too.
Yes Sweatpea, I do believe its genetic too. But theres worse things in life, (imagine if you were born with a tail :egad

24k tonight..getting closer.. (shattered)

[RunningCourage]

Re: August Army Manoevres

D'Arsey hope you get some benefit from the new forum you've joined. It can do you no harm and I'm sure it'll be more than beneficial to interact and learn from others who are going through the same things x don't be a stranger here tho x

morning folks.

great thoughts to wake up to... and the thing i see immediately is how it applies to other maladaptive and/or additive traits. ODATT, reading, reading, reading, little-by-little, sharing, talking, trying, trying and trying again... And I say this thinking both about AL and my own situ.

pea pie - and everyone else - i have ABSOLUTELY NO plans on being a stranger. Indeed, just now, this place feels a lot like my forum "home" and I so appreciate the advice, humour, more humour, dirty stop out outrageous humour and the fact that Molls hates AT Molls :haha: but loves skips... how could i disappear?!

5.45 - as planning on doing some early in-bed work... but forums and procrastination beckon...

Have a good day all.

[mollyka]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Morning all - awake hours!
Think you're dead right to speak with like minded folks re the eating Arsey - I find it truly frustrating trying to talk to people about something important to me when they don't understand - well done!
And hey to pauly yesterday - so busy i missed loads....... And 24k Mary - just WOW!!!

[starty]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Morning all. Good job on finding a specific forum RC. It is so helpful to find people in the same boat. I like you have always found here as my "home" so no matter what destructive behaviour I am engaging in, it will always be here that I return to :haha:

24k is outstanding Mary. I would have loved to be able to even contemplate that kind of distance in the past. Well done!

I always have this underlying feeling that I need to do more. Be it more exercise, more hobbies, more enthusiasm more interest in stuff and I really need to stop that. It is not doing me good. Anyone else have those kind of thoughts? Or is it just me :haha:

[starty]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Pea, sometimes shakey is good, it is a reminder that something else is required. In your case it appears that coming back here is the thing you are doing and that is great. You have done it before it is too late (as I did). I am still finding the ODAT theory helpful. Although I never did in my first quit. I was so certain I would never drink again. Now that certainty has been removed and I know how precarious it can be. That is not to scare anyone but just to let you know where I am on a second time around jaunt

[mollyka]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Morning all. Good job on finding a specific forum RC. It is so helpful to find people in the same boat. I like you have always found here as my "home" so no matter what destructive behaviour I am engaging in, it will always be here that I return to :haha:

24k is outstanding Mary. I would have loved to be able to even contemplate that kind of distance in the past. Well done!

I always have this underlying feeling that I need to do more. Be it more exercise, more hobbies, more enthusiasm more interest in stuff and I really need to stop that. It is not doing me good. Anyone else have those kind of thoughts? Or is it just me :haha:

constantly feel like that Starts and I sometimes wonder do I feel like that cos I seem to have arrived at this age awful quick - could be cos of a lot of wasted years in the middle - still striving to ' make up' maybe??

Pea, sometimes shakey is good, it is a reminder that something else is required. In your case it appears that coming back here is the thing you are doing and that is great. You have done it before it is too late (as I did). I am still finding the ODAT theory helpful. Although I never did in my first quit. I was so certain I would never drink again. Now that certainty has been removed and I know how precarious it can be. That is not to scare anyone but just to let you know where I am on a second time around jaunt

When I started here there were a few members that I COULDN'T relate to - they had moved on from addiction so obviously and successfully that I felt they were on another planet - it is imperative for everyone here to be aware how precarious our recovery is if we don't constantly keep in touch with our inner selves and thoughts without being consumed by it obviously - think you're doing brill Starts - can't be easy xxxx

[starty]

Re: August Army Manoevres

constantly feel like that Starts and I sometimes wonder do I feel like that cos I seem to have arrived at this age awful quick - could be cos of a lot of wasted years in the middle - still striving to ' make up' maybe??


When I started here there were a few members that I COULDN'T relate to - they had moved on from addiction so obviously and successfully that I felt they were on another planet - it is imperative for everyone here to be aware how precarious our recovery is if we don't constantly keep in touch with our inner selves and thoughts without being consumed by it obviously - think you're doing brill Starts - can't be easy xxxx

Yes! I do think it could be an age thing and the wasted years. However if I look at it objectively, were they really wasted? You have raised a family, got a lovely home and a successful relationship. Is that really wasted? Re me I have those things too,but feel I should do more with my life. I guess therein lies the key. It is that awful should word. I am afraid of being bored but on the other hand cannot be arsed to do much. Very contrary

Yes I know that feeling of being unable to relate to certain folk too. And also jealous of their success in the sobriety front and the creation of a new life with seeming ease and joy. Think the menopause has a lot to do with much of my current state although I am lucky and think it is not as bad as it could be. I am not depressed, kind of enjoy my hot flushes too. Just the uncertainty and the silly mind games that seem to plague

[starty]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Oh and facebook is pissing me off too. All these peeps doing stuff :haha:

[rustop59]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Oh and facebook is pissing me off too. All these peeps doing stuff :haha:

Good morning everyone. Jesus ye are a chatty lot this morning. Remember Starty, they only post the good bits on Facebook. I used to feel like you did and then I found crocheting. Learned something new, met a grand bunch of like minded people and am now CONTENT to spend the whole day, week crocheting. Well I am doing something I enjoy and the key is to enjoy what you are doing. I refuse at my age to do anything I don’t enjoy. Could easily spend my time reading, crocheting, Netfliximg, odd walk thrown in and if I’m really energetic a hill walk. Simple pleasures.

[starty]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Good morning everyone. Jesus ye are a chatty lot this morning. Remember Starty, they only post the good bits on Facebook. I used to feel like you did and then I found crocheting. Learned something new, met a grand bunch of like minded people and am now CONTENT to spend the whole day, week crocheting. Well I am doing something I enjoy and the key is to enjoy what you are doing. I refuse at my age to do anything I don’t enjoy. Could easily spend my time reading, crocheting, Netfliximg, odd walk thrown in and if I’m really energetic a hill walk. Simple pleasures.

Oh that is lovely to read Rustop thank you. How did you learn to crochet? Yes you are right about FB. Known that for a long time but it doesnt stop me feeling those stupid feelings that I know are daft. Sometimes think I should delete my profile but that terrifies me :egad:

[sweetpea29]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Morning all😊

Apologies if offended anyone with my thoughts last pm. Not intentional. When I refer to it as disease i could as easily call it a malfunction, and the genetic thing I know is only a factor. And yeah Mary, least I wasn't born with a tail!!
Suppose nomatter what it's called or why it happens the main thing is it's a problem affecting our lives.

Mary - good on ya girl on the 24K.

Starty- that is why I'm not on fakebook never come away from it feeling better bout myself. Such and a load of bollix.
Also constantly have a feeling of needing to do more, being lazy and a failure. Compare myself too much with others. In my head I'd love to have all these interests and hobbies but truth is when have some down time I just wanna sit and do nothing. Then feel guilty and more lazy!!

D'Arsey glad you will not be a stranger😃 Have a good day x

Rustop you sound so happy in your own skin- admiration from here!

Molls did ya sleep any better last night?

Procrastination has begun- should I get dressed or lounge in pjs for another while?!

[mollyka]

Re: August Army Manoevres

Yes! I do think it could be an age thing and the wasted years. However if I look at it objectively, were they really wasted? You have raised a family, got a lovely home and a successful relationship. Is that really wasted? Re me I have those things too,but feel I should do more with my life. I guess therein lies the key. It is that awful should word. I am afraid of being bored but on the other hand cannot be arsed to do much. Very contrary

)

I like - instead of 'I should' - 'I could - but I choose not to'

Well the 'missing years' -- mmm - a lot of it I put down to having been very busy rearing 4 kids more or less single handedly (Joe worked like 24/7) - BUT -- occasions.... birthdays - graduations - communion/confirmations - that sort of thing - sad that the beginning of the days are all clear up to the stage that the wine would be opened in the evening - then - so much just sort of 'missed' -- occasionally even still Jilly will say something like 'remember when......' - and frankly I don't - on holidays - the evenings would be a bit of a blur... that sort of thing - it is sad