RC - no offence on the female thing, think its just you and your brother,? so you are not included in my very scientific study of sons Vs daughters caring the elderly.
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August Army Manoevres
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Evening all
Late one again tonight. Been doing a Florence Nightingale, Charlie Dimmock and Delia (Darina) all day. Maybe am trying to do too bloody much but go stir crazy looking at things needing done - can't relax.
Thanks Mary for that suggestion x Never heard of it before don't think it's up here Norn Iron! What a brilliant thing though.
Daddy lives in the sticks -would imagine it's more of a city thing even if it were up ere.
All the family talk has me thinking. We, as in, my brothers, Daddy and I, would be quite close - have had our blow-ups like most everyone of course. The brothers aren't the worst, they're actually quite good to me in ways. I suppose if one didn't marry a Meath woman and go live there and the other wasn't gay and fecked off to London cos it weren't 'acceptable' to be a teacher in a Catholic school if you were 'out', they'd be around here and more help. We weren't brought up to live in each other's pockets and were encouraged to spread wings so it ain't their faults they've gone and lived their lives.
Me, on other hand am the home bird, the worrier, the sorter-outer/fixer, the nurse, gardener, cook blah......but that again is my own doing and ya know I couldn't imagine living contentedly anywhere whilst things are like this at home. Saddo I hear youse say! Suppose I don't really have a 'life' other than this so I need to pull up big girl pants and get on.
Have reached out to the brothers and they are more willing to help so will see!
Molly I remember you mentioning your evil sisters but my God that whole situation sounds horrible and so sad. You poor thing x Tho you do sound to have great perspective on it now. Think every family has an 'Enda' type personality in it unfortunately..
MrsA enjoy your time away with family. Imagine it is going to be magical x
Jacks- how'd the car christening go?
Well Satz- any news on YS? How'd his interview go? Find myself thinking of the situation a lot.
Yo D'Arsey 😊 You do sound busy. How'd the yoga go? Hope no willies were been waved there:egad:
Rustop -sad question alert from a fellow gardener!!! What do you use to spray the weeds? Do ya have one of those big yokes that ya carry on yer back? I need something seriously heavy duty!
Morning Bridget I didnt see yer candle back there honest! Fair dues to your folks for having the gumption to move to retirement place. will it be near you? Enjoy your day of gardening and de-cluttering x sounds like my perfect day.
Hiya to all else
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Originally posted by satz123 View PostI love the couch as much as I love skips
Life isn't passing you by - you are living it - both couches & skips are therapeutic ......
Molls I have an older cousin who was more like a sister to me and used to play the same sort of games. I pushed her out of my life lots of times when I could no longer tolerate it. I think she finally got the message after about 30 years.....
Ok there Starty?Last edited by byebyebridgetjones; August 30, 2018, 08:50 PM.If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
Rejoined life 20/5/19
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Thanks for the shout outs lovelies ❤️
I am fine thanks. Think ive just been a bit zorsted lately.
Been avidly reading about all your shenanigans but too brain dead to post.
Bridge same as you re time off. I will have all these plans to do stuff on my day off then end up doing feck all except ruminate and veg !
Pea i am like you as in being a home bird too so its easy to be seen as the sorter outer. Doesn’t really affect me now as i dont have much family left but this week my bro dropped quite a bombshell about stuff going on in his life just now. I feel glad that he has been able to share it with me. I guess the difference between him dumping stuff and kids doing it is that he doesn’t expect me to sort it for him :haha: still worried for him though
Its my birthday today so having a chilled day and will go to the cinema later. Looking to see the childrens act with emma thompson which looks a bit harrowing but good
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Good morning everyone and happy happy birthday 🎈🎁🎉 to Starty. Have a wonderful day and look after yourself. Not much of a baker so will let one of the later recruits get the cake in the oven.
Sweetpea I threw out the large sprayer and bought myself a smaller neater one. When I have a lot to do like the other day I put 10 liters in it. It’s manageable and not too heavy. We have a long gravel driveway and it had only been done in May so was getting out of hand. Did more decluttering in cupboards in utility room yesterday. Great feeling of satisfaction. Have a great weekend everyone.
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Morning and happy birthday Starts!!
Is the Children Act based on the Ian McEwan book? Great book -
I've gardened organically for all my years but jaysus you have to be on top of everything - would be tempted by a sprayer tbh - living in a bit of a wilderness lately - well done getting rid of the cousin Bridge - i would have got rid of the eldest sister in a heartbeat from the get-go - she was the most self centred person I ever met - all wrapped up in the skin of a caring self sacrificing martyr but my mammy would have killed me!!!!
Must now open the other eye ;-)Last edited by mollyka; August 31, 2018, 01:26 AM.Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
contentedly NF since 8/04/14
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Morning all,
Meeting a friend for coffee, nipping into work for a bit and getting a birthday present for our niece......21.
Her birthday party's tomorrow its just down the road so I'll dress up nice and say my hellos and leave after the buffet..........unless they play Mr Brightside.It could be worse, I could be filing.
AF since 7/7/2009
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Good morning folks
Happy Birthday Starty x Sounds like a noice day planned. Good to see ya too!
Thanks Rustop for the weeding advice x never used it before but gonna need it big style for my own place and Daddy's.
Last day off before heading back to work so plenty to do..... I foresee more cooking and hedge-cutting!
Have a great day all x
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Happy Buffday Starty!
Hope you're having a fantastic day - and not getting zorsted for all the wrong reasons (like work getting in the way of life )
Next door neighbour - fellow teacher - has just moved out with her partner to a lovely new abode a few miles away. Even though we were never in each other's pockets, it will feel a bit weird knowing they're not just across the landing
THOUGHT: This site, and those who work towards battling the addictive ways of AL, have an almighty job to do. Indeed it must seem - does seem - an impossible, insurmountable task. But MWO is filled with success stories of long term sobriety, as much as those who are living MUCH healthier lives, even if there are times on their desire to be AF that AL is turned to. Now, the reason I write this just now is that I am having another fight with myself (NOT the erectile dysfunction one :haha, but the other ED, and I realise that the neural rewiring that has to take place is a long, long and difficult road - but one that ultimately leads to a form of freedom. Naively I had thought that with AL, as with the ED, that it was just about a change of habit. Or of stopping doing something. But stopping drinking does not necessary change the neural rewiring - though it goes along way to help. And it is the rewiring that is the challenge. I remember Molls once saying an alkie can go ages and ages - months and months - without a drink in the knowledge that they WILL have a drink at the end of that time. The body may have readjusted. The mind has not. The reason I write this just now is that I find trying to rewire my thinking and believing about the ED so bloody difficult that it seems much, much easier just to carry on as i have always been. And i thought, well, that must be what some people feel about trying to give up AL.
Here endeth that rambling thought. Off to make ma tea. Back in a tootle.
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Wonderful reading your ramblings Mr D'Arsey.
I have often compared alcohol to food.
I don't have an ED per se but always having to watch what I eat is a pain in the arse.
But I have to say the rewards for stopping imbibing alcohol far outweigh any benefit I've ever had from controlling food - which I have done all my life. To such an extent that my metabolism is fecked to hell and anything I eat turns to fat.
In my youth I did everything from laxatives, vomiting, ( just a phase - and very unpleasant) 3 day liquid diets , fasting, Atkins, South Beach, Slendertone, ......... if it's out there I've done it.
Not sure the extent of your ED Mr D'Arcey and if it effects your life the way alcohol did ?Last edited by satz123; August 31, 2018, 11:51 AM.
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Evening! - my understanding is that there are two really different aspects to eating disorders - there's the one's where peeps just wanna look thin and good and it gets out of hand - my sister seemed to have that - it got her attention and sympathy and all the things she craved - and then there is the type that is like sometimes the only power someone can have when they are feeling powerless and unheard - so to speak - it's nothing really to do with body image.. the latter type is the hardest to deal with because it is so emotionally linked -- am I right Arsey?Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
contentedly NF since 8/04/14
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Re: August Army Manoevres
Originally posted by satz123 View PostWonderful reading your ramblings Mr D'Arsey.
I have often compared alcohol to food.
I don't have an ED per se but always having to watch what I eat is a pain in the arse.
But I have to say the rewards for stopping imbibing alcohol far outweigh any benefit I've ever had from controlling food - which I have done all my life. To such an extent that my metabolism is fecked to hell and anything I eat turns to fat.
In my youth I did everything from laxatives, vomiting, ( just a phase - and very unpleasant) 3 day liquid diets , fasting, Atkins, South Beach, Slendertone, ......... if it's out there I've done it.
Not sure the extent of your ED Mr D'Arcey and if it effects your life the way alcohol did ?Originally posted by mollyka View PostEvening! - my understanding is that there are two really different aspects to eating disorders - there's the one's where peeps just wanna look thin and good and it gets out of hand - my sister seemed to have that - it got her attention and sympathy and all the things she craved - and then there is the type that is like sometimes the only power someone can have when they are feeling powerless and unheard - so to speak - it's nothing really to do with body image.. the latter type is the hardest to deal with because it is so emotionally linked -- am I right Arsey?
Molls - yes, to a degree, but I'd say most people who have a genuine ED - that is, a mental health disorder that really ought to require treatment is somewhat different from the "vanity" types. But then, even someone who has overly obsessed about being thin, and wanting the attention that might attract has a disordered way of viewing eating/food. So it's not as simple as saying there's an a-type and a b-type, but i do see where you're coming from.
I also think there is a distinction to be made between disordered eating and eating disorders - eating disorders is a mental health issue, while disordered eating is something way more people have - some argue we all have disordered eating to some degree. (Perhaps similar to a distinction I saw between "alcoholic" and "alcohol abuse syndrome" [and I know this is all controversial on this site, so i do not given my opinion, just something i read] with the former being a physical addiction but the latter being abuse of alcohol but in which one could - with enough will power - stop without too much physical issues (shakes maybe, but nothing so powerful that the body shuts down without AL)... I;d also say there are peeps here WAY more knowledgeable re AL than me on this one - see JC ). But as for ED - when does a diet become disordered eating? Nearly all the female staff at work are on some Slimming World/Scottish Slimmers diet. All eat low fat yoghurts believing them to be healthier for them. Or next to 0%fat mayo. Not all of them need to lose weight. But it's almost like their dieting is one thing that bonds them, sharing in the woes of not having that slice of cake, or finding some Weight Watchers desert which is just delicious (until you look at the ingredients and see that it's nearly as long as War and Peace with hardly one store cupboard ingredient).
Sadly the food industry is so, so pervasive that we all (me included, indeed me perhaps more than yer average jo) have eaten it wholesale (pun intended!) when in fact it so much of it is bull shit. The areas of the world with the longest living peeps are the Med' and some place in Japan. The Med is quite a high-fat diet., the one in Japan is low-fat. It's NOT whether it's low fat/high fat that has helped give such longevity of life to these folks, but that their food is, by and large, natural - i.e. has NOT been artificially processed. Low fat yogurt is one of the most highly processed foods. And there was us worrying about bacon.
It is complicated, but what I am beginning to learn is that 1) we need to listen to our bodies more. Out bodies are not calculators - we ought not to determine what goes because of some calorific/fat figure. 2) To NOT listen to the food industry - well, in particular the diet industry - as the reports they expound are often misleading, contradictory and ultimately confusing. Easier said than done. I do think if we genuinely listen to our bodies more we know what we want need. Sometimes we may need to expand what we eat, neither is it to say we eat at a chippy for brekkie, lunch and dinner. But if we desire a fish supper, we should be able to have a fish supper.
Sorry - that was not meant to be so long!
Doc - ED didn;t affect my life the way food did, I don't think. Booze soothed the fact I couldn't control my eating, nor work out how to eat well (like normal people)... indeed I always felt I needed to learn how to eat again. [sometimes still do feel this]. So booze - let me escape from food, or if I was eating with others, removed any anxieties, and was also associated with being out with people - the pub, people's houses etc. So the evenings were about drinking and having fun and feeling good. Remove the booze - and the ED rears it's head again. Which is why I'm trying not to head towards the drinking route again as i think that would just capitulate me back into the status quo of how I have been eating... and the latter has made some small positive changes.
It's strange - i've not drunk for over 3 weeks, but these last 2 I have hardly thought about booze at all... and it;'s not because i've had some miraculous recovery, but that all my focus has been on the food and trying to eat better and face eating better.
Fuck - sorry - am i still here writing?! Can someone tell me to fuck off! :harhar:
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