September Army!!!

[satz123]

Re: September Army!!!

Rant alert.

I'm thinking we need to give the Army a kick in the arse.
Just checking in and giving my agenda for the day does not do it for me.

When I first started posting here I couldn't WAIT to log on and soak up what was being said. I logged on from work, stayed late in office to post , from my phone in the car in fact for the first 3 months I had to post only by phone - till I bought a laptop.
The MWO threads were hopping in those days - yes there were rows - but it only shows the passion in people - and the flaws in others. IMHO
Don't get me wrong there was some nasty individuals - usually still drinking - but also some very colourful charactars with differing opinions & not afraid to air them.
Maybe if the Admins read this : are we 'over censoring' MWO now? Are we now too PC ?

We had some great discussions a few weeks ago ?
This is a forum for those who struggle with alcohol and we rarely mention it ?

So endeth the rant :applause2:

[mollyka]

Re: September Army!!!

Rant alert.

I'm thinking we need to give the Army a kick in the arse.
Just checking in and giving my agenda for the day does not do it for me.

When I first started posting here I couldn't WAIT to log on and soak up what was being said. I logged on from work, stayed late in office to post , from my phone in the car in fact for the first 3 months I had to post only by phone - till I bought a laptop.
The MWO threads were hopping in those days - yes there were rows - but it only shows the passion in people - and the flaws in others. IMHO
Don't get me wrong there was some nasty individuals - usually still drinking - but also some very colourful charactars with differing opinions & not afraid to air them.
Maybe if the Admins read this : are we 'over censoring' MWO now? Are we now too PC ?

We had some great discussions a few weeks ago ?
This is a forum for those who struggle with alcohol and we rarely mention it ?

So endeth the rant :applause2:

Agree 100%
What can I say - I too used to log in looking forward to a good aul conversation - not just agenda's and stuff - but I've sort of given up tbh - there may be some feedback for a day or two if something is a bit 'out there' - but then it's back to -- agenda's and stuff... I opened my heart and soul here for YEARS in early sobriety - I didn't have false pride (that's a big one) if anything I over- stated things to show how bad I had felt in addiction.. and I didn't give a rats if I bored people - anyone had the right to ignore me totally - funnily enough - most didn't --
but now... it sort of feels like social media I'm afraid - and most of the time social media bores me rigid -- we are a recovery site - be it 10 days, weeks, months or years - everyone has their own feelings to share - but don't -- like WHY?? just saying we are grateful not to be drinking in given situations.. it's not enough - what about times we aren't grateful - what about times that we feel aggrieved - fed up - 'why me' -ish?? all those things - cos if we don't occasionally feel our life is a wee bit 'stinted' due to an addiction - well then - why are we here?

Probably said far too much but like Benjy I've been thinking that for a long long long long time -- cannot really see ANY thread - bar the Nest that would encourage any new person to participate either....
trotting out clichés and banalities - helps no one - least of all the trotter outer..
'nough said - I'm off to work

[JackieClaire]

Re: September Army!!!

[MENTION=9094]satz123[/MENTION]............I hear what you're saying but how do we fix it. We are basically a living sober thread now. The highs and the lows.

The last couple of weeks have been hard for me.............not only the fact we've had workmen in the house which used to be a huge trigger for me and tbh I'm not sure if I'd have coped without Mr JC here............my anxiety was through the roof.

Secondly the anniversary of the death of my best friend.........I'm still angry, sad and a bit lost even after all these years. It amazes me to this day with my alcoholism and believe you me I should be dead by all accounts the amount I was drinking and it puzzles (not sure if that's the right word) how I survived and a normal drinker like her got breast cancer and died...there was no history of it at all in her family....is it survivor guilt?

[abcowboy]

Well ladies and gents, I don’t have any suggestions, but I think the biggest reason that we’re experiencing the “soap opera” effect on MWO is a lack of new members. From what I see, there are about 5 daily active threads, Nest, Army, Steppers, Weekly Abs, and the Café, not including the Roll Call or Shout Out thread. And take a look at each thread, most everyone posting has been a member for quite some time, even the Nest has only one real Newbie that I can see.

We all have the opportunity to post on any thread we want, but that doesn’t usually happen because, at least in my case, I feel like I’m intruding on a group that’s already comfortable and I don’t want to interfere. I know that’s really not the case, everyone is welcome to post wherever they want. But if we always stick to our home threads, there’s only so much to talk about, or we hold back for whatever reason.

Now take what I’ve just said and apply it to the member that just signed up and has been reading throughout the various threads, where do you think they would feel comfortable joining in? Somehow we need to attract more new members and then make them feel welcome. Easy to say, not so easy to do…. I’ll have to ponder this some more, see what thoughts roll around in my head….

[RunningCourage]

Re: September Army!!!

[MENTION=9094]satz123[/MENTION] [MENTION=3546]Jack[/MENTION]eiClaire [MENTION=21602]abcowboy[/MENTION] and AT Molls... I agree with yis all. There's been a dearth these past few days certainly... and as JC says for many here (which isn;t many) it's become more a sober thread. I, as I'm sure many of us, if not all, were like Satz here at all times - i'd skive off work to read, head to the toilet to post something in my early days - when I was first here back in 2012/13.

But back then there were many more joining, newbies, and, like me, struggling to fathom what this relationship with AL was and how it could be better/ended. And back then more people posted and thus more opinions (good bad and ugly) were aired. And back then as there were more peeps there was more opportunity for cyber friendships developing - which in themselves kept people belonging to the community.

But now there are fewer. And one thing i notice missing (and this is both a good and a bad thing) are people's genuine struggles and battles and incessant debates about their relationship with AL, kicking it, modding it, kicking it again, off-and-on-and-off-and-on the wagon. And that was (and is for some, granted) real. But for many those initial battles are long gone. And though battles remain, these are battles which, for many here now, we battle with years of sobriety as part of one's armoury and a tool box we know inside out, as well as amassed wisdom.

So, for potential newbies, they don't read or hear necessarily the daily struggles, but instead the joys of sobriety and how good it is to be sober.
This site needs both - which I realise is a bonkers thing to say as we hardly want to be advocating drinking here do we?!?!, but you know I mean we need newbies as much as oldies
But the latter now outweighs the former.
Has MWO become a victim of it's own success?

[RunningCourage]

Re: September Army!!!

Evening peeps.

Interesting thoughts.

Agenda (done):

Went to school.

Worked with kids.

Came home.

Ate a chicken breast.

Prepped.

Agenda (to do):

Fanny about on the internet

Wash dishes

Watch OA

Read

Sleep...

Fuck me, my life makes Indiana Jones' life look positively humdrum.... :haha:

[RunningCourage]

Re: September Army!!!

Another thought I had re the site was whether it was... well, ageing? (The site, not the members!). I don't know, as I've popped onto other forums (nout to do with AL - like cycling and running and cooking ones!) and i suppose maybe they are much of a muchness... but there do appear to be other sites that have a forum element but appear to do a bit more, or a do posting a different way (the ED forum is actually one for start-up businesses, or project management, but works really well for falling multiple threads. Granted there is no "home base" like I have here at the army, or others do at the nest, nor does it have the potential for people's own threads - like Mr G's or Pauly's. Just throwing the thought into the mix.

[mollyka]

Re: September Army!!!

and good thoughts too - well - and I'm just 'speaking' my thoughts - haven't thought it through.. so here goes -- as you all know - I went to rehab and at the time I described my experience as a positive (as opposed to negative!) brainwashing - and unlike anything else in my life I try to ALWAYS abide by what I learnt there - and consider I must to remain sober - not for 10 years or 20 - but for life - and one of the main things they told me was that in the long run I couldn't do it alone - I needed support - so after the 2 years of AA I tried to make MWO my support... but I know - absolutely KNOW - that if I had a crisis re my sobriety - MWO would not be the support I would need - too many trolls and bad people in the past have taken any trust away from me for one - and secondly - well - I feel like a keyboard warrior myself - too shagging easy -

So what do I do now? Do I chance that I won't have a crisis? stupidity.....

I don't know is the answer

[JackieClaire]

Re: September Army!!!

Didn't all of us find MWO and jump for joy when we found out we could control our drinking? Then had a proper look and realised we had to take a shed load of drugs some (or most) of them banned in our part of the world.

I do AA ( tbh haven't been for a couple of weeks) and I'm getting comfy....will I get a sponsor I doubt it. Staying sober is no longer a daily battle but I'm never going to say I'm 'cured'.

There are so many alternatives to MWO..........if you don't want to leave your armchair........Rational Recovery, SMART, WFS are the few I know of but I'll stick with what I know.

[mollyka]

Re: September Army!!!

But that's the whole point im making - it's too easy to pontificate from an armchair - I think I'm going back to AA - need to practise what I preach -

[satz123]

Re: September Army!!!

I may be thick Molls .... but you are going to AA because ? :newhere:
I still have a slight worry that we are being 'over policed' - and any quirky or still obviously still drinking new members are not getting to post
I'll copy my post above to the Admins and ask the question.

[satz123]

Re: September Army!!!

[MENTION=9094]satz123[/MENTION]............I hear what you're saying but how do we fix it. We are basically a living sober thread now.

But Jacks I don't like that ....... I WANT folk who have fallen of the wagon to come and still post ........ but because we are a living sober thread they don't.
Really little point to it at all if we don't get a mix of sober and 'not so sober' .... and people feel comfortable posting either way.

[IamMary]

Re: September Army!!!

hi,
Interesting posts, very good points.

We could all make an effort to chat more about our struggles with booze?? People do it in AA a couple of times a week, so why not here.
Of course life goes on and thats an important part of being sober too, but I know every conversation I read here or elsewhere on being sober, reinforces my decision and some day I might need those words in my head.

Bridge asked me ages ago to share my story, never got around to it. Before I nod off...
I was hiding drink for almost 20 years. Before I met my husband in fact. I didnt escalate too rapidly, which was odd. I was extremely functional. Work, home, drinks with friends (before kids), drinks from my wardrobe.
I always made it to work and never drink in the morning. Therefore, I didnt fall into the 'alcoholic' category, as I understood it.
As I settled into married life, the wine was flowing, everyone seemed to drink all the time. I would try to be good and stick to a half a bottle every night mid week, but make up for it at the weekend.
form the moment I work up, I was making plans around getting wine and consuming it.

and now Im falling asleep, Ive lost my point :harhar:

[IamMary]

Re: September Army!!!

I remember.
Escalation.. how quickly did it start to get out of control for anyone? Did anyone else have a long period of hiding their ‘habit’?

[JackieClaire]

Re: September Army!!!

But Jacks I don't like that ....... I WANT folk who have fallen of the wagon to come and still post ........ but because we are a living sober thread they don't.
Really little point to it at all if we don't get a mix of sober and 'not so sober' .... and people feel comfortable posting either way.

Very late midnight lurk here or it could be classed as an early bird special anyway to clarify..........when I said we're basically a living sober thread I meant that was what we've become................I should have added we always and I repeat always welcome anyone who's struggling to get sober, stay sober, starting out for the very first time or a serial relapser. We know their fear, their dissapointment, we know we can never become complacent............we have learned to cope in drinking situations, how to avoid them, how to to tolerate them............knowledge that has been passed down to us from old members, tricks we've learned from AAers, things we've worked out for ourselves...........between us we've got years of experience. If someone needs a hand to hold we will reach out...........like I said not so long ago it was Bridget who sat and chatted about nothing when I went to the dentist on my own for the very first time...........yep..........me big JC at 50+ years scared witless by a dentist and newly sober....... Bridget must have sensed that fear in all the jokes I was trying to make and reached out her hand.

Now if someone's got the sleep fairy give her a nudge my way.