November Army Manoeuvres 2018

[JackieClaire]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Morning,
New teddy bear knitting pattern has a twist.........on closer examination its a bunny rabbit.

'Blood' had an excellent start. Even toyed with watching the second episode last night but it was gone 11pm.

[MENTION=22839]brit[/MENTION].......please let us know how you are, darling.

[brit]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Hi Army-- Back on track with a plan. Cannot do anything about Mr A and his cancer or my daughter going to the UAE (Long story) But I can do something about me and my losing control.
Went out on my own yesterday for a longish walk and had a good talk to myself.
Rang a friend and asked her to meet me early this morning for a run and will fill my days and evenings with distractions from the pity party that is going on in my head.
Off to the dentist for some major dental work in a bit that should be very distracting!

[byebyebridgetjones]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Hello the house.
Welcome back Brit. You are very brave, love. Glad you have friends around to spend positive time with. Got to get our strength where we can, eh?

Mary, you have the patience of a saint staying up until 3 to drive them all home. No way would or could I do that.

Another late check in for 4 weeks. Feeling pretty stable for now. Getting so much more done with my day. I remember this!

[JackieClaire]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Evening,
[MENTION=22839]brit[/MENTION]...........lovely to see you checking in. That's the way to do it although I wouldn't recommend the dentist every day.

[MENTION=9170]byebyebridgetjones[/MENTION]..........a gentle happy dance for you .

Started off an ordinary Monday until the kettle blew up, I over salted the curry for tea and got a message from Jenny saying she was ill and off school...........so I rang her.
Bad idea. It dawned on me that she only texts me when she's ill, skint, upset. I've turned fecking cartwheels over the last nine years making amends for what she sees as being hard done in her youth and she's still at it. You'd think she ran around with her backside hanging out of her trousers. This wasn't the time to tell her about how ill I was because I would bet you a penny to a pile of shit she'd turn it.

Apologies for the rant but feeling a very low.

[NoSugar]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Apologies for the rant but feeling a very low.

Here's a :hug:, JC, and one for you, [MENTION=9094]satz123[/MENTION] :hug:. It didn't occur to me that parenting with all of its ups and downs wasn't a more finite experience (i.e. 18-22 years or so). I'm sorry you're having some tough times but it is reassuring not to feel alone. We're fairly stable at the moment, which I appreciate, but some rough patches are ahead and I always feel like I'm waiting for one of them to drop the next shoe.

I have been reluctant to chime in about your son, Satz, because I don't know if I could do it myself, but the view from outside expressed by your friends here, that he needs to be out of your space, sounds right to me. It isn't his call about his grandmother's house. You're offering him a place, but not YOUR place, to live. He can take the offer or go elsewhere if he can find a place to go. I hope you reclaim your space soon, too, [MENTION=9170]byebyebridgetjones[/MENTION]. Your "guests" are asking/demanding way too much of you.

I wanted to thank you for sharing what's been going on with you, [MENTION=22839]brit[/MENTION]. I often feel myself becoming complacent and stories such as yours remind me that I'm not better/stronger/less addicted than anyone here. I hope your husband's next surgery is successful and that he isn't in pain. I'm glad you know that it is important to take care of you, too. Take care, NS

[satz123]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

I have been reluctant to chime in about your son, Satz, because I don't know if I could do it myself, but the view from outside expressed by your friends here, that he needs to be out of your space, sounds right to me. It isn't his call about his grandmother's house. You're offering him a place, but not YOUR place, to live. He can take the offer or go elsewhere if he can find a place to go.

Thanks NS :hug::hug:

Do you know though - Rosie has totally changed the dynamics in the house. YS has been sidelined and the latest relapse lasted only 2 days and he was back on track.
We hardly talked to him - and he had to just get on with it himself.
Detaching has happened organically - we've have stopped obsessing about him & his drinking, where he is , what he's doing...

Now it's : where's the poo ? Did she eat her food ? Did she piddle ? She gave me the paw today ? She likes me better than you :haha:

[satz123]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

I've turned fecking cartwheels over the last nine years making amends for what she sees as being hard done in her youth and she's still at it. This wasn't the time to tell her about how ill I was because I would bet you a penny to a pile of shit she'd turn it.

Time to stop making amends Jacks - you've done your bit over last 9 years.
Next time she texts - tell her to go to bed with a hot drink & that you hope she gets well soon and leave it at that. She's a big girl now and time to stop unburdening on her mother.

[rustop59]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Evening. They all do it JC, unload then feck off feeling better for having unloaded and leave you worrying or feeling like crap. Heard a good expression at work today re puppies and them leaving you happiness pools :happy2: very true, last puppy here leaked when you came to let her out, she was so happy to see you. She’s got her forever home and is being spoiled rotten. Well done Anon, great to see you back. You deserve a medal Mary, bet you are glad you won’t have to do that for a while again. Night all.

[IamMary]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

It dawned on me that she only texts me when she's ill, skint, upset. I've turned fecking cartwheels over the last nine years making amends for what she sees as being hard done in her youth and she's still at it. You'd think she ran around with her backside hanging out of her trousers. This wasn't the time to tell her about how ill I was because I would bet you a penny to a pile of shit she'd turn it.

Apologies for the rant but feeling a very low.

Maybe its time to detach a bit when shes using you as a punch bag. Im very close to a subtle bragger, REALLY annoys me. When it starts, I'm suddenly have to run, very busy... Shes still never got the hint mind you... the thick

I wanted to thank you for sharing what's been going on with you, [MENTION=22839]brit[/MENTION]. I often feel myself becoming complacent and stories such as yours remind me that I'm not better/stronger/less addicted than anyone here.

Well said NS. Especially during silly season I find myself questioning my decision with the usual predictable thought "was I really that bad".
Youve got a good plan there [MENTION=22839]brit[/MENTION].. how was the rest of the day?

Well done Bridge, you are flying it now!!

[byebyebridgetjones]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

It didn't occur to me that parenting with all of its ups and downs wasn't a more finite experience (i.e. 18-22 years or so).

:harhar: Yes I believed that memo as well NS. Hilarous. If only this generation would live up to their contractual obligations to leave (no boomeranging)
JC, daughter is manipulating via guilt. And why don't we ever hear from them in the good times? Before everyone descended upon me again I had the house to myself for over 12 months and never heard from a soul unless I texted them or phoned. No doubt about it, people will treat you exactly as poorly as you allow them to.

Dogs are the best people in the world Satz. Might do YS good not to be the centre of attention and angst for a change.

[byebyebridgetjones]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Yes still reflecting on four weeks.
I know better than to set too many goals or try to do and change too much at once, but I think for month two I'll try to cut down on food, esp sugar intake as it is ridiculous. I found this link again:

Sweet preference, sugar addiction and the familial history of alcohol dependence: shared neural pathways and genes. - PubMed - NCBI

Strikes me that if sugar and alcohol are processed along the same or similar neural pathways then it's not going to be a good look to stimulate those same pathways with sugar. I put on a truly enormous amount of weight the first time I quit and never quite got it all off. The whole idea is to feel better with all of this so that's my conservative goal for month two along with decluttering - starting with the house guests. Oh and getting a new job better feature soon as well.
There was a bit of a stoush at work today. The idiot new boss is an annoying gnat of a person as mentioned. Today she took it up yet another notch and was buzzing around us re-organising my office and looking at our screens over our shoulders. I have caught her twice flicking through my personal diary? Ruffling feathers everywhere. I've never worked with a mental case like this one. Anyway my office mate stormed off slamming doors and swearing like a trooper. I wish I had video, I honestly do.

[JackieClaire]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Lots of @@@@'s this morning

[MENTION=18725]NoSugar[/MENTION]............thank you.......

It didn't occur to me that parenting with all of its ups and downs wasn't a more finite experience (i.e. 18-22 years or so

.........it never ends. I wonder if we should tell all the young 'uns the truth that the lovely little bundle of joy they're expecting

Time to stop making amends Jacks - you've done your bit over last 9 years.
Next time she texts - tell her to go to bed with a hot drink & that you hope she gets well soon and leave it at that. She's a big girl now and time to stop unburdening on her mother.

I can and I will. I'm not her best friend I'm her mother.
I know a lot of it is the centre of attention being switched to the upcoming nuptials of the S&H........pure jealousy. We know about as much as her. As mother of the groom I'm not in the epi-centre of all the goings on.......I just turn up in a nice frock.....suits me.They're paying for most of it.........we're paying for the wine and water on the tables as a wedding present and that's it.

[MENTION=9170]byebyebridgetjones[/MENTION]...........give me a dog any day. They just need feeding, walking and scratch behind their ears and they'll be your best friend forever. If there is re-incarnation I want to come back as a lady of an undescript age with a shopping trolley with several different breeds of dog attached and a wooly hat.

[MENTION=9170]byebyebridgetjones[/MENTION]........start a new personal diary with many moans about her. How could she tell her superiors she found out without giving herself away........cheeky fecking mare.

[stirly-girly]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

Good morning Army!!

First of all - to [MENTION=9170]byebyebridgetjones[/MENTION] - huge congrats on 4 weeks AF in spite of the troubles on both the home and job fronts. Well done, our girl!!
[MENTION=9094]satz123[/MENTION] - Rosie is just what you needed at this time IMO. She's adorable, cuddly and a girly to boot. I have to agree with what the others say. YS needs to move to Grandma's place ASAP. You could offer to help him move on the weekend, or whenever you have a day off that coincides with his. And by offer, I mean, pack his bags for him and help him put them in your car and drive him there. I know it sounds tough but after all, he'll be close to family and in a familiar place.
[MENTION=7008]JackieClaire[/MENTION] - again, I agree with what the others have said - you need to stop making amends. You've left the life of an active alkie behind you 9+ years ago. IMVHO, you don't have to apologize for how you were, or make amends. Being an alkie is not what you/we chose - it's what we became for whatever reasons. You are sober and a loving, supportive wife and mother. That other Jackie belongs to the past and that is that. For some reason, our kids think that we should have served them life on a silver platter. It doesn't happen that way. Wait til they get kids of their own an see how easy it is FFS. Oh, and a belated happy anniversary! It's so lovely to see couples that are truly happy together. :heart:

Mary, I would have been in my nice warm bed by 3am rather than driving people home. Especially if I'd gone to so much trouble to feed them all. You've more patience than I have by a mile.

Mrs. A [MENTION=22839]brit[/MENTION] - I'm so sorry to hear that Mr. A is poorly. Do take care of yourself as best you can. Yes, you need to run if that's what helps you cope. Then look after the others....
[MENTION=18049]RunningCourage[/MENTION] - hope you're feeling brighter. That incident with the child and the foster-mum's daughter must have been very upsetting but as the others said, the school should have been informed. You had a zillion other kids you were responsible for and you can't always know who is who and what you are supposed to do in any given situation.

Waves to the hiking Rustylocks, Mr. G - congrats on your continued sobriety, ABCowboy who must be up to his knees in snow and to anyone else I've forgotten.

Will post the latest goings on in Stirly-World in a bit....

[satz123]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

[MENTION=9170]byebyebridgetjones[/MENTION] Thanks for the link on sugar. My advice - having put on weight too - is not to worry about weight at this early stage. It's too much and you'll get overwhelmed eventually..
Don't try to catch all the rabbits at once - it won't work. One at a time.
Pick one small change a week or even every 2 weeks.

Today she took it up yet another notch and was buzzing around us re-organising my office and looking at our screens over our shoulders. I have caught her twice flicking through my personal diary? Ruffling feathers everywhere. I've never worked with a mental case like this one. Anyway my office mate stormed off slamming doors and swearing like a trooper. I wish I had video, I honestly do.

She sounds like a looper Bridge.
Tell her to f*ck off nicely - and stop invading your space. Is that even legal to read you personal diary?
NO ONE READS BRIDGET JONES' DIARY :rant:

[stirly-girly]

Re: November Army Manoeuvres 2018

There was a bit of a stoush at work today. The idiot new boss is an annoying gnat of a person as mentioned. Today she took it up yet another notch and was buzzing around us re-organising my office and looking at our screens over our shoulders. I have caught her twice flicking through my personal diary?

That is way out of line. A total breach of office rules. Your personal diary is just that - PERSONAL. If you see her again, call her out on it. It is outrageous that someone would do something like that. I'd be furious and then some!!!!!!!!!