One Step at a Time - February 2019

[Lizann]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Good morning and happy Sunday! [MENTION=1214]Rusty[/MENTION], happy birthday my dear friend! :heartbeat: I'm not good like Nora with the pictures, sigh. Hope you have an amazing day and just pamper the heck outta yourself. I'll have some cake here for you! [MENTION=16215]MinStar[/MENTION], welcome! I'm glad you found us. This site and this particular group has been life changing for me. Little about me, I'm a wife, mother and now first time gramma. I'm in 59 (ouch). I never drank until probably my early to mid forties. I have always struggled with anxiety. I would have a glass of wine with dinner, then while cooking dinner and then after dinner etc. I became a closet drinker and hid it very well. No one knew. But of course that escalated to the point where I was unable to hide it and I got, well sloppy and found myself doing things that were just plain stupid. It got that bad. Like Nora, the thought of how I drank makes me nauseous. We now watch my grandson daily and I sure as heck don't want him to have a grandma who's drunk. I have been sober now for almost a year (2/24)! My father passed away this past summer, I had to put my beloved dog down just 3 weeks later and my son moved to London. I was sober. I'm taking it a day at a time and yes life throws some tough things at us, but I don't want my kids to remember their mama as a drunk. Anyway that's my story. [MENTION=2634]bird[/MENTION], that is a rather odd get together. I was laughing cuz I thought you said mascara at first! I admire you. You do such interesting things.
Are you ever bored? [MENTION=5628]Nora[/MENTION], don't feel bad about hospice. You do need the help. Savannah is so cute! Those eyelashes! Pure joy!
@Glassie, you had me laughing with you description of the boy! I have missed you! How exciting!
Yes we got the paint. Hubby is grumpy. It's a big job, I know, and we hate the mess but it needs to be done. I got a coffe yesterday at dunkin donuts. The one I always go to and the girl gave me the senior discount without me asking for it:egad: that really hurt and it was only 11 cents.
Well I'm off to church and then to celebrate my nephews birthday with the family. Hope you all have a great AF day!

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Happy Birthday Rusty!!!! hope you have a fun day,do something nice for yourself Welcome Minstar,I'm 45(bleh) have 4 kids and 2 g-sons,live in Vegas am a hairstylist and have been trying to quit drinking for good for years,not sure what my problem with it is,sometimes I think I feel I just need that release I guess,til it makes me sick that is Nora,Savannah is getting so big! She's a doll.Bird,nah I wouldn't think I'd be into the drum circle either,my former counselor had suggested I go to one that the tribe holds monthly but I never went,like you I felt everyone probly already knew each other and I'd be the oddball out,waves to all and wishes for a happy AF Sunday!

[MinStar]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

[MENTION=1214]Rusty[/MENTION] a vegetable biriyani is and Indian dish made with lots of veg spices and rice. I add a few handfuls of red lentils to increase the protein content and make a yogurt and chickpea flour based soup to go with it. [MENTION=19302]Lizann[/MENTION] I think I remember you from the first time when I joined MWO. Enjoy your time at church and the party. [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION] thanks for sharing. Ooh Vegas. I really want to comenthere. My teenage crush has a residency at one of the casinos and I want to come see him. So much so I’ve even thought the money spent on Al can be saved to fly over the pond!

Thank you for sharing your stories and the warm welcome. It seems we all have similar stories. Mostly the drinking getting out of hand in our forties.

[MinStar]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

[MENTION=2634]bird[/MENTION] I have a cousin who is a herbalist and she made them for me. I know she has Ashwaghanda, St Johns Wart, Lavender, Valarian, Passion Flower, Curmin, and loads more. She has given me some for anxiety and some for liver support. I’m taking some extra strong vitamins and minerals to as I’m sure my body is very depleted. Hope that helps.

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Happy, Happy Birthday Rusty. I hope that you are having a very special day. Enjoy your lunch. I'll have some cake too, since Liz insisted. Ha, ha.

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

[MENTION=16215]MinStar[/MENTION] - Oh Min - how fun if you go to Vegas. Now, I'm curious about your teenage heartthrob. How nice of you to cook for your MIL

How is your anxiety now?

[NoSugar]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

I never drank until probably my early to mid forties.

That makes me feel not so alone, [MENTION=19302]Lizann[/MENTION]. I didn't drink at all until sometime in my mid to late 30s and it did not become a problem until sometime in my 40s. Sometimes I wish I could chalk it up to starting during my clueless youth when dumb, impulsive behavior is often expected and excused. But, no, I took up the habit as a fully functioning adult, aware of the risks but not thinking they had anything to do with me, and completely unaware of what lay ahead. One good thing about that though, is I knew full well that is is possible to be an adult and do adult activities without drinking ---I had done it for years! The trick was getting back to the point that that was how I wanted to live. Having now done both, I can say for sure that none is the way to go for me!

Happy Birthday [MENTION=1214]Rusty[/MENTION]. You and Lizann get to still say you're 'in your 50s' :smile: I've crossed the bridge to the next decade and while I wasn't too thrilled about that at first, it's fine. Years are nothing but made up ideas anyway so we don't have to pay attention to them if we don't want to :wink:.

[MinStar]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

[MENTION=9757]NoraC[/MENTION]. Surprisingly anxiety was fine this afternoon. Fed kids myself. Chilled with them and had a bit of TV time with hubby. Off to bed now. Would normally had way too much and be crashing out. Think I may peruse the forum and listen to my book or meditation and zzzz. It will be a tough night I know. 75DC8719-A027-489A-A359-9E76DF62A1C7.jpg

Hoping the attachment works. This is me meeting him 30 or so years later (last August) when he did a nshow in town.

Thanks I cook for her when I can but trying not to be the doormat that I take on the job myself. How are you?
[MENTION=18725]NoSugar[/MENTION] - so many hit the stage in theyre forties. Is this a mid life crisis? As you say we know the consequences but choose to ignore them. Pressures of life? I still ponder this. I know I’m an older mum so used to put it down to the relentless tedium of parenting young ones. But the more I read it isn’t about parenting so I wonder.

And you’re right years are nothing. - pay attention to what is important. The present.
MinStar

[bird]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Hi all,
Happy Birthday Rusty, hope you had a great one! ...Liz, I was thinking you must be getting close to your 1 year mark. Sorry about the sr. discount, that happens to me too. Good you got the paint.....Min, thank you for the info on the herbs. I am always trying different stuff. The pic you posted is sweet. Glad your anxiety is better....Nora, hope you have a good book. I am reading an amish romance novel hehehe. Nothing going on today, cold and dreary. Watched an old movie Rainman. Friend called and was laughing at my description of the drum circle. ..Pauly the one the tribe has might be good. This is the only one I have ever been to where people talk. Kinda bored today, yes I get bored. Time alone in my head wondering where I am headed in life. So glad for the cats when I am feeling a bit weird....later

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Nice to hear everyone's stories again. Thanks for that.
We are watching 'Dead Like Me'. Totally random but one of the grim reapers character just started drinking again. Sneaking it & having a couple of friends ask him if he's drinking again.

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Rusty - Happy Birthday again and safe travels. :heartbeat:

[Rusty]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Good Evening Friends, and thank you EVERYONE for all the wonderful birthday wishes!!:heartbeat: Well, my b-day luncheon with my friends turned into 5 hours of food and laughter. I won bone-in pork chops and steak in the meat raffle. [MENTION=9757]NoraC[/MENTION] and [MENTION=8902]Glass Half Empty[/MENTION]-I can see you shuddering right now as I know you are vegetarians.
[MENTION=21602]abcowboy[/MENTION]...thank you for the BEAUTIFUL Cake!:happy2:
[MENTION=16215]MinStar[/MENTION]-what an interesting meal. I don't have a taste for Indian food but that dish sounds intriguing. I think a number of us started our wine habits in our late 30s and 40s but then of course, wine didn't "get the job done" when we were using it for anxiety so we graduated to hard liquor. Well, at least I did.
[MENTION=19302]Lizann[/MENTION]-wow, you've been sober for almost a year! Geez, where does the time go? So proud of you..but I will not jinx you.:love:
[MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION], Pauly-you never give up trying to achieve sobriety...and one day, it will just "click"
[MENTION=18725]NoSugar[/MENTION]-turning 58 does not bother me. It's all good!

I don't think I told you that my newly sober friend has her ex-husband living with her now. He is in his late 60s and has been alcoholic for many, many years. He has throat cancer that has spread to his lungs but he is such a positive person now because he is almost 2 years' sober. I meant him when he was still drinking and I thought, "what a loser!" Irascible and negative, I didn't care if I ever saw him again! Today was such a different story. It was SO nice to be with both of them. My friend is SO much funnier now that she's sober because when she was drinking...she would cross that line for laughing into becoming irritable and slurring her words. She has such a big heart and has been a wonderful friend to me for about 15 years, but I almost severed my friendship with her. Her ex seems to truly enjoy her company and they were playfully teasing each other. It was just so great.

Tonight, I am so very grateful...for the friends I have here and my friends here at home.

Thank you all again for the great birthday!

I am flying out early so I won't be able to post until tomorrow night...so I hope everyone has a happy Monday and Tuesday!

[MinStar]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

[MENTION=1214]Rusty[/MENTION] congrats on the raffle win. I’m also a vegetarian so wouldn’t have been impressed with it sounds like you had a delightful day. Have a safe flight [MENTION=19302]Lizann[/MENTION] well done on a year! That is brilliant. [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION]. Keep going. You can do this. We can never give up. Ever.

So yesterday I had a sense of fed upness. Just can’t be bothered to spend all my time and thoughts on AL. I just felt like I could be bothered with it all. I just don’t care about it. Like I was done with it. I found my anxiety was lower when it is normally at its highest and I didn’t want to drink. Did anyone else feel like that?

Hope everyone is having a good Monday.
MinStar

[bird]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Hi all,
Nothing going on here...safe travels Rusty, Min, I get like that, just so done with thinking about booze, through with it and all the crap it brings.....so the cats stayed in last night and Bruno up at 330, put him out, Meow up at 430 put her out, then slept late, it gets me off routine. No cats in tonight. Bruno is losing his winter coat, big blobs of fur, no more puffball.

[Rusty]

Re: One Step at a Time - February 2019

Hello Friends,

I have arrived safely in Canada, although it was a 3-hr. Drive from Toronto because of a crash on the freeway. Oh well. :-). I hope everyone had a good Monday!