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November 2019: International Army

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    #46
    Re: November 2019: International Army

    Originally posted by mollyka View Post
    But I do think we are learning till the day we die - I'm sure folks in AA with 25+ years sobriety would agree - and the day we stop learning is the day we stop putting the work in.. and it's not all about lifting the glass - it's how to make life as wonderful as we can without our previous life-long crutch...
    To me, this is one of the silver lining parts of overcoming addiction. To be contentedly sober, we have to do the introspection and exploration that so many “normal” people miss out on. Some stay stuck where they are and while they luckily miss out on the pain of addiction, they also don’t experience the joy and peace of lifelong recovery. I wish I’d learned this life lesson in a different, less painful way but I’m grateful to have learned it.
    Last edited by NoSugar; November 3, 2019, 09:34 AM.

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      #47
      Re: November 2019: International Army

      Hi, All:

      Adding a new timezone for the list (although actually Pauly and I are in the same zone).

      Nora and NS, as you both know, I lost my dad this summer after a long bout with Alzheimer's. It DEFINITELY took its toll on all of us caregivers in ways we did not appreciate at the time. Take GOOD care of yourselves. It is exhausting.

      And Bridget - because of your Avatar I think, "of course it will work out with the guy at the office." It's a rom/com in the making...

      Good to see you Molly!

      Pav

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        #48
        Re: November 2019: International Army

        'I've already started why stop?' How right you are Pauly - I was exactly the same when in full flight -- nothing would stop me.. and also agree whole-heartedly with you NS -- I am still discovering things about myself - albeit little things - but just feel I'm missing quite a few years in the middle - not literally - like wasn't in a black out for 20 years or anything:egad: - but just definitely not firing on all cylinders - gaps in everything - even still my kids will say to me 'do you remember when..?' or 'whatever happened that time...?' etc... and to my shame I still somewhat pass over as best I can -

        Didn't know about your Dad Pav.. so sorry - and like the others - such a hard time to have gone through... :hug:

        I don't know why but I always thought you were one of the Oz contingent --- good to see you too!!!!
        Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
        contentedly NF since 8/04/14

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          #49
          Re: November 2019: International Army

          Morning All,
          Black and white thinking...oh yes. 'Why stop now' was a great little excuse to get legless. A bit like 'I'll start tomorrow'. Procrastination is the drunk's friend.

          Nah, won't be having any relationship action for a long time. This particular case would make work awkward, but the most important thing is, it's too early into sobriety for me to even think about a relationship. Actually. how long should you wait? My only reference point is that movie '28 Days' where one year minimum is the suggested time except for those already in a relationship of course. There was also an episode of 'Sex and the City' lol. A friend went to rehab years ago and they also suggested no new relationships for quite some time. Not that I'm hanging out to have one, but does anyone have any experience of this?

          Better jump into the shower. I'm off to work, gratefully without a hangover.
          If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
          Rejoined life 20/5/19

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            #50
            Re: November 2019: International Army

            Happy November, International’s x
            Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

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              #51
              Re: November 2019: International Army

              Originally posted by rustop59 View Post
              Delighted your Mom still has her sweet nature Nora. Isn’t this a wonderful resource to have. Bet you never knew when posting your every day stuff that it was helping someone else like No Sugar.
              This is a wonderful resource. And you're right, I never imagined anything I was writing about Mom was helping anyone else.
              Last edited by NoraC; November 3, 2019, 09:52 PM.
              "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
              ..........
              AF - 7-27-15

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                #52
                Re: November 2019: International Army

                Morning Nora -- and god yeah like with everything - it's wonderful to read about someone successfully navigating a difficult situation - not calling your mum difficult at all - but its not easy - and I s'pose our next generation will be dealing with similar down the road - you should diary your life if you've time!

                Bridgey - re. relationships - well I went to Aftercare for 2 years after treatment.. and they were quite adamant that any big change should be avoided wherever possible for 2 years - up to that stage we should truly concentrate on healing and growing... same thing said in treatment.. I thought it was a bit brutal at the time (there were a lot of young people in the Aftercare group) 2 years can seem like an eternity - but now -- yeah I think I can see the sense of that..
                Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
                contentedly NF since 8/04/14

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                  #53
                  Re: November 2019: International Army

                  Off to work side by side with R.. -- you will be hearing me mention her again in the next 2 months - I have been gloom filled all weekend facing into this rotation... but it has to be done so -- off I go!!
                  Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
                  contentedly NF since 8/04/14

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                    #54
                    Re: November 2019: International Army

                    Originally posted by techie View Post
                    Happy November, International’s x
                    And a great big bear hug for you too.
                    If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
                    Rejoined life 20/5/19

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                      #55
                      Re: November 2019: International Army

                      Evening everyone. Work day over. Hope your day with R went ok Molly? Horrible horrible day here, absolutely lashed rain. Feet up and having pizza for dinner. Don’t do it very often but think daughter is still in holiday mode.

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                        #56
                        Re: November 2019: International Army

                        Howdy Techie...didn't see you back there this morn....yeah what a poxy day Rusty..rained all day..and R did NOT help the mood!!
                        Just wondering where JC is? Xx
                        Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
                        contentedly NF since 8/04/14

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                          #57
                          Re: November 2019: International Army

                          I've just crawled outta my sick bed and had a shower and now a hooman being.
                          I thought I was just feeling sick because England lost on Saturday. Turns out I was proper poorly.
                          Our two nieces have gone down with something similar.
                          I'm up to meeting my pal tomorrow as nigh on two days in bed has driven me up the wall.

                          There's a problem in the excitement of being newly sober that we think we can take on the world, cure all illnesses, sort out climate change,write a novel and at the weekend become a wedding planner after sorting the wardrobes in the back bedroom.
                          First and foremost avoid that first drink, ask for help, listen, take what will work for you. Keep it simple and give it time.
                          It could be worse, I could be filing.
                          AF since 7/7/2009

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                            #58
                            Re: November 2019: International Army

                            [QUOTE=JackieClaire;1772266]There's a problem in the excitement of being newly sober that we think we can take on the world, cure all illnesses, sort out climate change,write a novel and at the weekend become a wedding planner after sorting the wardrobes in the back bedroom.
                            First and foremost avoid that first drink, ask for help, listen, take what will work for you. Keep it simple and give it time.[/QUOTE [MENTION=16186]available[/MENTION] and I were just chatting about this very thing. We each did nothing for months - I did less than the day before I quit when I was so busy proving (to myself, mostly, I guess) that there was nothing wrong with me.

                            I'm glad you are feeling better :hug:.

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                              #59
                              Re: November 2019: International Army

                              [QUOTE=JackieClaire;1772266]There's a problem in the excitement of being newly sober that we think we can take on the world, cure all illnesses, sort out climate change,write a novel and at the weekend become a wedding planner after sorting the wardrobes in the back bedroom.
                              First and foremost avoid that first drink, ask for help, listen, take what will work for you. Keep it simple and give it time.[/QUOTE [MENTION=16186]available[/MENTION] and I were just chatting about this very thing. We each did nothing for months - I did less than the day before I quit when I was so busy proving (to myself, mostly, I guess) that there was nothing wrong with me.

                              I'm glad you are feeling better :hug:.

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                                #60
                                Re: November 2019: International Army

                                Boy, posted twice and neither one looks right!!

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