is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances?

[julia1970]

hi you all,

i've relapsed into heavy drinking and cannabis addiction. i have lots of experience in this, but it's not helping me out.

i guess one of the things that's making it difficult to turn the switch is that i'm feeling very alone with this.
my love is very sympathtic, he's a very caring and gentle man. he grew up with an alcoholic father who thoroughly neglected and traumatized him. it speaks for itself that it is difficult for him to deal with my boundarylessness. in his powerlesness towards my addictive behavior, his reactions are not helping me though. i feel so ashamed of myself already that when someone, leave alone him, reacts irritated or angry when i'm stoned (smoking weed is mostly the issue, though it is facilitated by drinking alcohol), i feel so ashamed of myself and angry at myself, that i shut down completey and have a hard time opening myself up to him or myself anymore. of course this leads to drinking and smoking.
none of my other friends know that i've relapsed.
i have such a history in addiction. i've overcome it everytime, it's so frustrating to be at the same spot again.

i was wondering if joining this forum could help me.

[Slo]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

Hi, Julia, and welcome! I think hanging with us could be helpful for you, as we all struggle with alcohol addiction, and it is helpful to not feel so alone in this. There’s strength in numbers! This site addresses only the alcohol addiction aspect, but of course cross addictions are common amongst us all.

Please join us for support as you tackle quitting -and especially since you feel unsupported at home.

[mollyka]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

Hi Julia - welcome.. and as Slo says - it's mainly alcohol addiction for most folks here - but in my opinion - an addiction is an addiction... the basic problem is within ourselves 'needing' the substance whatever it may be,,,

which comes first? Do you smoke the weed and then want a drink - or do you have a drink and then weaken and have the weed? I know when I was in treatment anyone who was cross-addicted with weed and alcohol - they were strongly told to quit both regardless if one of them wasn't consumed in an addictive fashion...

[available]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

Hi Julia and welcome.

As Molly says an addiction is an addiction and we all understand that on MWO. I was addicted to al and cigarettes and took the same approach of stopping smoking as i did giving up al. today i am 272 days smoke free. Never give up trying to give up.

The newbies nest is a great starting point to pop in and introduce yourself. I found that finding people who really understood me was a great step in getting sober and getting the support i needed to realise that i am not a bad person, i just needed some help and guidance. Reading the different threads was also helpful to realise you are not alone.

[julia1970]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

thanks alot for your replies people.

you're right Mollyka, i should quit both. it doesn't matter what i use, addiction has been a red thread in my life. it's a little difficult to give in to the idea of quitting everything though. maybe step by step. i'm just not sure what approach to take at the moment.

i'll post at the newbie's nest.

[mollyka]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

thanks alot for your replies people.

you're right Mollyka, i should quit both. it doesn't matter what i use, addiction has been a red thread in my life. it's a little difficult to give in to the idea of quitting everything though. maybe step by step. i'm just not sure what approach to take at the moment.

i'll post at the newbie's nest.

I think that's the point I was trying to make Julia -- like - I kept smoking for almost 3 years after I quit alcohol because I found it a help - a crutch I s'pose - but in no way was it a trigger to drink.. if for instance you quit alcohol and kept smoking weed - is weed a trigger to drink alcohol - or vice-versa? It is hard to quit everything at the same time I guess - but if they trigger each other - that's the way it will have to be - no if's or but's about it... and when I say hard -- d'ya know - it's ALL in your head - few days of withdrawals and physically you'll probably be grand (unless you were abusing either in a very major way) so if you make your mind up -- 100% that this is the way forward -- not 99% -- the tiniest 'out' the smallest excuse will find you back as if you never quit - but if you know 'this is it' -- honestly - that's a very large part of quitting.. it just seems so much easier...

Ava is right - the Nest is where we almost all started - wonderful place -- honesty - kindness - and wisdom - all abound!!! Read around all the threads tho and you are welcome anywhere you feel you would like to post... you've taken a great step -- now build on it!!

[caysea]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

Hi Julie
This is a site for people who abuse alcohol. You will find a great support network here. I would suggest you check out NA or Smart recovery. They are organizations that deal with many different addictions. In the recovery world you will want to live a clean life
. That means being in the present not using chemicals or substances to alter your mind. They have much better tools and programs to give you the help you need.
You are certainly welcomed here and will find accountability with the friends you make here. We just don’t have the latest information provided by the medical world in regards to drug addiction or for that matter alcoholism

[julia1970]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

hi Caysea, thanks for your advice. yes it would be best to join NA. the problem is that i can't. i know some people at NA and am not free to share my personal shit with them (because of my work situation).
i have little confidence in other group and individual treatments, just because i've tried (and failed with) most of them. as for meds, i've tried campral, antabuse, naltrexone and baclofen (this last one with success, although i tapered back down to quick). i'm rather well informed about treatment options, and what to do to support myself in quitting. it's just that i'm having a hard time accessing those resources from the lonely pit (self-pity, self-loathing, and a feeling of powerlessness) i find myself in right now.
my problem is addiction, i've been addicted to several substances, and alcohol is the one that has been the constant factor since 20 years.
i think what i need most right now is being in contact and feeling some support.

maybe i'd better switch to the newbee's nest for further posts.

[Pavati]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

Hi, And Welcome, Julia--

If you've tried all of those things, it sounds like alcohol IS a problem, right? You've come to the right place for support. Read around the threads and jump in. The newbies nest is where a lot of us started, but there are other threads also.

I agree with Molly - admitting you have a problem and committing 100% to quitting are key. Once you do that, when you're feeling anxiety or bad about yourself, you will KNOW that you can't turn to alcohol or weed and you'll have to come up with Plan B. For me in the beginning it was hiking, taking a bath, posting and reading here and other sober blogs, and being completely honest with my husband.

Take care of yourself - you're worth it.

Pavati

[julia1970]

Re: is this forum only for alcoholics? or also for mixed users / different substances

which comes first? Do you smoke the weed and then want a drink - or do you have a drink and then weaken and have the weed? I know when I was in treatment anyone who was cross-addicted with weed and alcohol - they were strongly told to quit both regardless if one of them wasn't consumed in an addictive fashion...

the first thing that got me into addiction (ehh over 35 years ago) was alcohol. other substances came and went, this one stayed.

no if's or but's about it... and when I say hard -- d'ya know - it's ALL in your head - few days of withdrawals and physically you'll probably be grand (unless you were abusing either in a very major way) so if you make your mind up -- 100% that this is the way forward -- not 99% -- the tiniest 'out' the smallest excuse will find you back as if you never quit - but if you know 'this is it' -- honestly - that's a very large part of quitting.. it just seems so much easier...

that is such a simple and refreshing thing to read mollyka thanks, and you are right. this helped me from sinking a little deeper into drama (is all that drama just a part of the addiction, i often ask myself)

(ooooh but it's so tempting tocome up with a 'but'! no! no buts!)