International Army February 2020

[JackieClaire]

Re: International Army February 2020

Late check-in.

Mrs Brit, they've just released two people from the RVI up here.
I remember one of your daughters getting married in Gretna. It was Winter, wasn't it?

Oh meant to say, was watching am ancient Law & Order made about 2003/4 and they mentioned the coronovirus in that. :exclaim:


Ours was 12 weeks start to finish. Hired a dress and one for my bridesmaid although we both looked like something out of Dallas.
Had to be a registry offfice as I was married before (oh the shame, the shame, the shame, :harhar.........even the proddy churches back 35 years ago wouldn't marry a divorcee.
You could only book the registry office 3 months prior to the date you wanted..........we were there at dawn.
Would you believe my MIL who is Catholic was a bit........shall we say a bit 'iffy' about at first...........thought it was great.
The caterer was a friend of Mr. JC so he did the food at cost and we paid the waitresses. My Godmother made the cake and for the evening went into China town with six mates for one of their banquets.

[byebyebridgetjones]

Re: International Army February 2020

Morning Chickadees.
I am still coughing from the coffee I inhaled over Mary's photo up there.
So tell me this...I also come home and re-do my hair after the hairdressers. These days I just say 'don't blow dry it' because I like the way I do it better. Why are we paying these people to do it then? They already overcharge disgustingly (look at the price of men's hairdressing for example) Men's clothing? Better quality and cheaper? I think so. Toiletries? Same.

Look at me. I'm straight back in with a RANT!

As for weddings, I'm glad I never had one. Unfortunately I was involved in a few and it was not fun. Thankfully I was still drinking at the time so was able to organise an arm-wrestling competition on the lawn of the historic house venue with the MOB (drunk as hell) winning> Good times

I'd love to be quarantined for 2 weeks.

[IamMary]

Re: International Army February 2020

I'd love to be quarantined for 2 weeks.

:haha: I was actually having a day dream about that the other day.

Good to hear things are ok [MENTION=22839]brit[/MENTION]. How long will he need to stay in hospital for?

Oh meant to say, was watching am ancient Law & Order made about 2003/4 and they mentioned the coronovirus in that. :exclaim:

Is the coronovirus a name that covers all virus transmitted between animals and people? Im surprised there are not more, when you think about it. Hows your friends son doing? Doubt hes going nowhere soon..
[MENTION=9094]satz123[/MENTION], time to cut the apron strings on the old job. We've all done that, feeling guilty when leaving a job, say you'll help out ANYTIME, its not a problem. Well, time to tell them to feck off now.

So, the almost 16 yr old (boy) went to a beach party (in Ireland, everyone is frozen solid and wear 20 layers of clothing). I picked him up and could smell the booze. 1 can of Guinness he says. Could have been more, but he wasnt slurring etc.
I didnt lose the plot + we had a good chat about it - I said I wasnt happy blah blah blah. He is pretty sensible, unlike the loon coming up behind him, but I wonder if this is the right approach. Or what is the right approach?
Drinking age is 18 here. I was 14 or 15 too when I started, quiet normal here. But look where that got me..

[satz123]

Re: International Army February 2020

Just in from DD birthday bash in Dublin..

but I wonder if this is the right approach. Or what is the right approach?

Mers I don't know the answer to that. All I know is you are now showing great example to your kids by not drinking. I often think kids are like sponges & mine may have picked up the vibe - Adults drinking alcohol = happy & jolly

And we all know where that led in this house ...

[mollyka]

Re: International Army February 2020

Underage drinking...what can I say? No idea really..I muddled through that period day at a time..all of mine were tall so by the time they were 16-17 they were served in pubs and I felt that was safer - well they couldn't afford much! I do know you can't stop it but ah here...like Benjy says you are giving the best example. I spoke to Joey (my wildest) when he was a teen about my sobriety and it didn't make much difference back then but he says now it had a big impact and rarely drinks now

[JackieClaire]

Re: International Army February 2020

Morning, just.
[MENTION=22411]IamMary[/MENTION]....you handled the situation beautifully. He's now half child/half-man. The pressure put on young people is horrendous, Get exams, get a good job, go to uni and on and on and on. Make sure he knows he can come to you ( which no doubt he does).
The good news.
Young people turning their backs on alcohol - NHS

[brit]

Re: International Army February 2020

Good afternoon I was up at 5.30 to have breakfast and go out for a 7am run (to fit in with hospital visiting).

Pissed down the whole run but I loved it--ran with a guy who "confessed" to me that he had given up the drink 12 years ago, he explained how his life had changed for the better. Although I trust this man I still could not bring myself to tell him any of my story. Not sure what that is about?
Need to eat some dinner now.

[mollyka]

Re: International Army February 2020

Good afternoon I was up at 5.30 to have breakfast and go out for a 7am run (to fit in with hospital visiting).

Pissed down the whole run but I loved it--ran with a guy who "confessed" to me that he had given up the drink 12 years ago, he explained how his life had changed for the better. Although I trust this man I still could not bring myself to tell him any of my story. Not sure what that is about?
Need to eat some dinner now.

Hi MrsA -- good you'd a good run.... 'not sure what that is about?' Well over the years I've asked myself similar.... if it's just you are extremely private and it's no one's business but your own? that's fine - that's normal -- if I had ingrown toenails I wouldn't go telling everyone about it... if it's 'shame' -- shame is not a good thing to carry around - in fact in recovery we really should feel pride - not shame -- battled with that a lot myself but finally I'm dead chuffed with myself -- finally if it's because there's the tiniest sneakiest MOST private wee thought in our heads that maybe --- just maybe -- this ISN'T forever.. so not going to leave ourselves open to being 'caught out' so to speak in the future -- that's a real issue... so yeah - it's just a matter of being completely honest with ourselves... imVVVVVho as always!!!

[JackieClaire]

Re: International Army February 2020

Just a quick check-in from me as I'm dog tired but the nicely dog tired as we've had the S&H here. Him & his missus away to Mexico in a fortnight. Her brother teaches English out there. Four days in the city and the rest at some resort.

If someone shared that with me and this is just me........... I'd say "neither do I. Haven't done for donkey's years" It opens a dialogue.

There's a wee story from the library last week...........remind me tomorrow. I'm orff to bed.

[IamMary]

Re: International Army February 2020

THanks all for the confirmation, that is really helpful. I'll roll with this and see what happens. Your right, i am 100% sure if I was still drinking, and therefore Mr M drinking like we used to, the 'chat' would have been very different, if at all (Id have told him to stay in his grandparents, lifts at 11pm, no chance!).
Interesting about Joey.
[MENTION=22839]brit[/MENTION], Im the same, can never open up. Private, yep. Shame, dont think so. Fear of being judged, probably.

Tell us a story [MENTION=7008]JackieClaire[/MENTION] :happy2:
Also - I like that link.

[rustop59]

Re: International Army February 2020

Night all. Looking forward to the story in the morning, can’t keep my eyes open right now so better go to bed.

[satz123]

Re: International Army February 2020

a guy who "confessed" to me that he had given up the drink 12 years ago, he explained how his life had changed for the better. Although I trust this man I still could not bring myself to tell him any of my story. Not sure what that is about?

Ms A. The reason you didn't 'confess' as you say is because it is a private matter and if you choose not to tell anyone so be it.
Just because he told you - does not mean you have to share too. Any other illness is private unless we decide to share - so why do we have to wear badge declaring we are alcoholics. It's no-one's business.

I am SO PROUD of myself for getting sober but if asked now why? I shrug and say 'I wanted to' & leave it at that.

IMO ... What we regard as an achievement is not how 'normal ' drinkers see it. I believe it is seen as a weakness that we had to give it up.
I was out in a pub last night at the birthday bash. After a few hours of shouting to be heard, I decided it was time to leave. I had to almost drag MrS out the door - "one for the road" ..... I suggested he get the Vomit Comet home ... but that didn't suit either. Fucking painful.
It embarrassing because I end up losing the cool.

I could almost hear the conversation after I'd gone.
" why is your Mam leaving ?"
"Ah she doesn't drink".
Ohhh I see ...........

It (the affliction) and those afflicted need to be labelled - I will not allow myself to be labelled.

[JackieClaire]

Re: International Army February 2020

The story.......was in work next week being trained on the computer actually looking for the @ button.

There's a bloke comes in and I recognise him......bit of a scruff but he's usually walking his dog.......I know him vaguely from around here so I said hello.............I was brought up proper.

Trainer: You need to watch him
Me: Why?
Trainer: in a whisper......... He's an alcoholic............
Me: Why do I have to watch him? Thinking he sometimes kicks off or starts ripping pages out of books
Trainer: He walks out before checking the book out.
Me: I'm an alcoholic.
Trainer: Jaw drops.
Me: 10 years sober. I might know how to deal with it if he kicks off but can you show me what to do if he forgets to check out.

She gave me this odd look as if to say someone who has managed to get her trouser on the right way round, be married to a lawyer and read was beyond her..............we are judged. While I'm ashamed of some things I have done in the past.........I'll be buggered if I'm ashamed of what I've become.

We all have a story.

[JackieClaire]

Re: International Army February 2020

And its snowing.

As for categorising................we all live in a tick box..........we have to tick which age group we're in, what gender we are, where we originate, religion, salary,tick, tick tickety
tick.

[mollyka]

Re: International Army February 2020

The story.......was in work next week being trained on the computer actually looking for the @ button.

There's a bloke comes in and I recognise him......bit of a scruff but he's usually walking his dog.......I know him vaguely from around here so I said hello.............I was brought up proper.

Trainer: You need to watch him
Me: Why?
Trainer: in a whisper......... He's an alcoholic............
Me: Why do I have to watch him? Thinking he sometimes kicks off or starts ripping pages out of books
Trainer: He walks out before checking the book out.
Me: I'm an alcoholic.
Trainer: Jaw drops.
Me: 10 years sober. I might know how to deal with it if he kicks off but can you show me what to do if he forgets to check out.

She gave me this odd look as if to say someone who has managed to get her trouser on the right way round, be married to a lawyer and read was beyond her..............we are judged. While I'm ashamed of some things I have done in the past.........I'll be buggered if I'm ashamed of what I've become.

We all have a story.

Absolutely love that story...so proud of you!!