woops, I didnt realise it was so late! its tomorrow already.. late for bed again.
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International Army June 2020
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Re: International Army June 2020
JC you little legend. 4000 lovely, free days. Wouldn't be dead for quids as my Dad says.
I had the pleasure of reaquainting myself with Kate Bush during the week. I was a mad fan in my teenage years - when everybody else was listening to Jimmy Barnes screaming - and I really 'get' her. Apparently she is still highly reclusive and roars at people for lurking around her house in the country and using her path. I laughed my head off at that.
I'm just a bout to hunker down and watch my episode of 'Gardener's World' over lunch then off to the garden for the arvo. It is the most utterly perfect sunny winter day here and there is much pottering to be done!If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
Rejoined life 20/5/19
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Re: International Army June 2020
Originally posted by fickle View PostLets see, the mediation went surprisingly well. I am so lucky to have had that opportunity provided. We definitely were able to clear the air. I was right about the danger of him feeling accused if I’d offered feedback myself so very fortunate to be so well supported in them giving that to him. The facilitator was masterly. Part of it was separate meetings beforehand, then a session together. During the beforehand she assessed communication styles and was able to give him feedback on things he’s doing such as talking over, not listening, assumptions he made and the yelling. He kept saying he respects everyone at work with but she showed him he wasn't demonstrating respect. This was a great shock for him as he had no idea what he was doing. She was also very tough on him during the together part and pulled him up each time he did it. It was a breakthrough for him I’m sure. As you know I left that job before because of bad behaviour from former managers and was worried he was being influenced by them. Turns out I was right about that too and was able to tell him what really happened. I could see he was genuinely shocked at what they had done and would never do such a thing himself. We both felt huge relief and there were even a few tears on both sides. I’ve come away with little hand signals I can give him when he’s getting out of line and now that he knows what he’s doing he wants to change it. Things should gradually improve with practice as all the right intentions are there. Glad I can talk about it here as its too confidential to mention to anyone here.
I'm not overly surprised because it's a human thing, but disappointing how he mindlessly took on board a toxic culture and perpetuated it. His lack of self-awareness is startling but if he's genuinely taking it on board and open to change that's an amazing outcome. There might be a little something in that for all of us. Kudos to the mediator! Girl!
Wouldn't it be amazing if this whole ugly incident - which you've handled in a very mature and measured fashion by the way - seagued into a new culture in your workplace? I've got a tenner on it that you aren't the only one affronted by his behaviour.If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
Rejoined life 20/5/19
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Re: International Army June 2020
Hi All
Congrats JC. 4000. A long way from that first week, first month, first year. And it started for you and all of us with that first day. Even though it has been 4000 days I bet you can remember that first day. Something we all have in common
CayseaStay Healthy and Keep Fighting
AF 5-16-08
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Re: International Army June 2020
[QUOTE=JackieClaire;1782840]Morning and waves to the world and double posters.............its a cake day. Not only is it the S&H's birthday and Mother of Satz is also 90 and Mr. Jc's got the day off.........I've reached the giddy heights of.......drum roll.........4000 days sober.
Aw Jacks - so sorry you had to make your own cake. :hug:( can't get flour over here ) really !CONGRATULATIONS on 4000 days inkele:inkele:
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Re: International Army June 2020
Originally posted by JackieClaire View PostI quite like wearing glasses, hides the bags under my eyes
It'll be grand, just a bit of a shock. My Granny was in 90s when she had hers done.
As Molls says cataracts apparently are a doddle - and you'll be grand.
You are young to have them but who knows - we use more screens etc than previous generations.?
You've lived through the 2020 Pandemic having COPD - so you can survive anything.:hug:
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Re: International Army June 2020
[MENTION=9094]satz123[/MENTION].................I don't know if you can get BBCiplayer over there but there's a fascinating program I watched called. 'Keeping Britain Fed' (its got Sarah Cox in it)...................the problem was with lockdown everyone had to cook at home and the suppliers while they flour places had gignatic sacks for bakery firms, restaurants etc................they hadn't enough of the little bags for those of us who do home cooking.....hence the shortage on supermarket shelves......they're up to scratch now...........its a fascinating watch as well.It could be worse, I could be filing.
AF since 7/7/2009
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Re: International Army June 2020
Eeeeh and all the visitors.
[MENTION=6034]caysea[/MENTION].............I'll never forget that first day. Well there were a few blurry bits. Even with the diazapam the withdrawls weren't good. I just pop the image into my mind now and again.............it works.
Big fat thankyou to all of you. :hug:
Better read back now and see if I can go for three in a rowIt could be worse, I could be filing.
AF since 7/7/2009
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Re: International Army June 2020
Originally posted by fickle View PostLets see, the mediation went surprisingly well. I am so lucky to have had that opportunity provided. We definitely were able to clear the air. I was right about the danger of him feeling accused if I’d offered feedback myself so very fortunate to be so well supported in them giving that to him. The facilitator was masterly. Part of it was separate meetings beforehand, then a session together. During the beforehand she assessed communication styles and was able to give him feedback on things he’s doing such as talking over, not listening, assumptions he made and the yelling. He kept saying he respects everyone at work with but she showed him he wasn't demonstrating respect. This was a great shock for him as he had no idea what he was doing. She was also very tough on him during the together part and pulled him up each time he did it. It was a breakthrough for him I’m sure. As you know I left that job before because of bad behaviour from former managers and was worried he was being influenced by them. Turns out I was right about that too and was able to tell him what really happened. I could see he was genuinely shocked at what they had done and would never do such a thing himself. We both felt huge relief and there were even a few tears on both sides. I’ve come away with little hand signals I can give him when he’s getting out of line and now that he knows what he’s doing he wants to change it. Things should gradually improve with practice as all the right intentions are there. Glad I can talk about it here as its too confidential to mention to anyone here.It could be worse, I could be filing.
AF since 7/7/2009
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Re: International Army June 2020
4000 days!!? [MENTION=7008]JackieClaire[/MENTION] - you are a STAR!!! Fantastic job and a huge thank you for 1 - being the first to welcome me to MWO and 2. still being around after all these years, continuing to support others!! :heart
As for the cataracts - my special friend had two removed last year and he's just 55. They had gotten so bad that not only were things dull and blurry, he'd actually lost the ability to see bright colours. That was the first thing he noticed when the first operation was over - he could see colours again!!
Big waves to everyone - I've had two teeth extracted in the last week and am taking it easy. Oh and a new employee hired this past week. The thick, smelly one is defo on the way out. Has me mental most days. Not much else to add except that my cherry tomato plants have produced enough fruit for a salad. Grandson loves them so he will get to pick and eat them. l
Hopefully catch up with youz later - hope you're all having a great day!!
Edited to add - Ficks - great news on that meeting. My guess is that a lot of companies could use that kind of mediation. Hope your job situation is much, much better.Last edited by stirly-girly; June 20, 2020, 05:46 AM.For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
AF since 10/10/2015:yay:
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Re: International Army June 2020
Congratulations on 4000 Jax! X
Great work Fickstar!
Hi Stirly whirly!
Hello to all. 'ave a good weekend.
'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'
Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-
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Re: International Army June 2020
Congratulations on 4000+now days Jackie!I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:
I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!
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