ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

[nething4usp]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

Just Wanted to Say Sorry

I just wanted to let all those who have posted that your messages have been read, although I must be honest to say that even though there were so much good advise and best wishes, it's as if my mind and heart went numb to learn yesterday, that the most precious person in my heart had left detox. I know it's not the magic cure, I know it takes the comittement to be successful, and it doesn't stop once you leave the hospital be it after 1 day of 6 months......I've just fallen apart here and feel so helpless and uselss and know it's the worst possible thing for both of us.

thank you all for being here, for listening and mostly for caring
your words and advise mean so much to me

will catch up soon

[nething4usp]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

just an update

well have had a few emails, and it seems that he left the detox, was very frustrated with all the meds and that everything had been taken away. From the emails I've gotten seems very disappointed and yet seems to be thinking can do this on his own without detox, but I'm not 100% convinced this is true. Apparently centre has called and asked him to return,
he was dead set against, suggested he do a positive / negative list, and that as it was the weekend maybe would be good idea. Think it was Hart mentioned there was alot of crying, and that seems to be the case here also. Also suggested if not going to return to detox maybe would be good time to see a doctor, replied to exhausted to do anything.
Did say was going to look into local AA program and intended to go to meetings.

I did send copy of wonderful post found here "swimming pool" another opportunity to encourage him to come to site, hopefully will.

Did find out, or so was told, he told employer that he needed to get to detox on Tues, and appears to go there immed. after leaving work. So seems hopeful to me at this time that there is a desire to control if not abstaine from drinking.

He did seem very disappointed with detox at centre, mostly what he felt was over dosing of meds....kept trying to reassure that meds would be given based on what they were told by him and vitals....and that if he wouldn't go back to centre he was at, that as was there 2 days that weekend seemed like good time to perhaps try detox at hospital, hoping it would be a more "comfortable environment" if that is a possibility when ones' system is going through all the changes.

I didn't get an answer as to whether apt was alcohol free or not, which concerns me, but appears appetite is better than in the past.

Sorry there is so much I'm trying to take in....and to offer to him from all the posts and replies all of you have given....without over stepping my bounds and having him shutting me out. It's hard to understand from the outside, when I'm reading bits and pieces from his emails....that bring in parts of the various posts from here.

Thank you all again for listening, posting, and mostly for your support and encouragement

Maybe I'll win the lottery this weekend and will be able to go, to see for myself...lol
and if when that doesn't happen....I'll keep my promise to him, to always be here...he's just too important and means so much to me, not to be.

hope the day has been a good one for you all

[nething4usp]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

It's just past 5.15 AM, and I am here again after 3 hours of trying to find a way to sleep

While I was here posting an update, I got THE email I guess I had somewhat been waiting for, but never wanted to receive " I've relapsed "

All I could think to do at the time was to reply with "pls call a cab - and get back to centre,
this is much bigger than you - pls call me" at this time it seems to still be unread.

Since he told me he was an alcoholic, it's almost as if I've been walking on shreds of glass, so carefully not to put my foot in my mouth, by questioning things that didn't seem right.....because I was so afraid of losing him, and the thought of him either being lost in this addiction, or struggling to free himself from it was breaking my heart....but these past 2 days, especially today has obviously been where I have kept tripping over myself and fallen completely into all that glass many many times- and have now been left in shreds.
All I have heard the last 3 hours screaming through my head and heart -is all the unanswered questions, all the "I'm sorry, I'm doing my best to understand" I've given.
And I'm feeling so used and abused - even though I want to believe it's not how he wants me to feel - he just has a better friend, that's been part of his life, so very much longer than me.

I had an interview scheduled for this morning - of which I sent an email last night and said
a former colleagues father had passed away, that I just heard and funeral was today - and could I reschedule for Monday, just so that I could be on line - in case I was needed.
It's finally clicked in - his addiction has now taken over my life - and I have to get it back now.....I just have to figure out a way of doing it....It's impossible for me to turn my back to him and walk away......it's just as impossible for me to stay, never knowing when I'm being lied to....

[stevewm]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

Hello everyone.

My name is steve and I am a real Alcoholic that just got out of a treatment center here in North Central Louisiana.I was admitted .I went into detox friday night and after having it out with a really rude nurse signed my 72 hour release and am glad I did.I was released yesterday early also.They have everyone there so messed up on pills it`s not even funny.Everyone has a really hard time staying awake in AA Meetings and can hardly walk around.Every few hours its medication time and my heart raced and my skin felt like it was literally on fire.The 1/2 life of some of the meds will not wear off for weeks and now I am in withdraw from them.

I was told to shut up and listen and take my meds.I am 41 and was put into a senior care unit with people from their 70`s up and alcoholism has showed itself on their poor faces but the smell was just unbearable.I was in senior care because they had no extra beds in the younger adults unit and I was literally locked in behind steel doors with them and being watched all night long by a camera as if I were a criminal.The whole hospitals patients on every floor when let out to smoke all walked like zombies and the meds caused me to actually hear someone talking to me and no-one was there.

The medications had me temporarily in-SANE.

Its was enough for me to think of that place before I drink for sure.

I just hope your hubby does not have to experience something like that or no-one- else.The treatment center I was in I believe they actually drive some of their patients in-SANE.I am sober now for my 4th day and have posted here before and my sobriety date was March 10th 2007 after a near fatal welding truck crash that nearly killed me and my wife and after 40 or so days of sobriety I did drink again and it was all day again until my experience with brentwood hospital treatment center in shreveport La.

God bless everyone and thanks for listening.

Steve.

[nething4usp]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

Steve

I'm so sorry to hear about your experience, but truly appreciate you sharing it with me/us.
The person I am concerned about is someone I met in a game room 2 years ago, and we have shared nightly emails ever since. Especially in the last 18 months we have talked more about our personal lives, I'm not sure how far back in this thread you read, my original post was in Family/Friends....and then suddenly out of the blue he admitted to me that the sudden change of tone in emails was that he was an alcoholic. About 3 weeks after telling me this I got an email at 8.30 AM his time he was admitting himself to detox.

Your experience echo's almost identically word for word his experience there, with the exception that he was not with seniors....but it seems that all but 3 of those at centre were there for asst drug addictions. He left after about 30 hours and it was because of the "zombie" all the meds he had to take he became. There seems to have been some initial benefits to his experience there, the greatest one I have seen is that after 2 years of emails, he finally called me and we have spoken on the phone the last 4 nights for at least 3 hours at a time. Unfortunately, since leaving detox early Tues evening, I know of at least 3 "relapses" of old habits, and there is possible more....he has a long term project he has been working on at work for the past 8 months or more, and completion is scheduled for Aug.....he keeps telling me when either sober or after drinking that his intention is to return to same centre in Aug of this year when work project will be completed, but that he will speak to them first about the amount of drugs administered, and a few other concerns he had. My biggest concerns are 1) after the experience will he go back 2) he is a very caring and considerate person to others he comes in contact with, and I am very concerned that when/if he goes back....his attention will be given to those around him, and will again have an unsuccessful attempt in detox.

It seems at this time, he does not want to try any alternatives, Drs. advise/meds, psychologist, acupuncture, my way out program....and keeps telling me is determined to try as best he can to get through to Aug...and re-enter same detox centre.

He keeps reminding me that only alcoholics can understand what this disease is, but appears grateful that I'm trying with all my heart and thoughts to understand, as I believe he is ready to quit/moderate his drinking, because of the destruction it has caused in many aspects of his life. Without question he is right, the more he tells me, the more I question.
My hope is to try to find a way of even understanding a small aspect of his life,
my fear is .....will the determination to quit that had him self admit himself, and his disappointed of his experience, not lead him back there in Aug.


I truly appreciate you sharing your experience.....and hope you also keep finding a way to add 1 day more, everyday to AF days.

best of luck to you and your family.

[magic]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

Hi Net,
I'm glad to hear that you are considering the impact this situiation is having on your own life and that you may not be hearing the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

But a little tough love here , my sweet.

You seem a little suprised that he is drinking again. Of course he is. He is an alcoholic. He can't just stop. He is physically, emotionally and spiritually addicted to alcohol. He has just begun this journey-if he decides to continue.

There is something else though I think you should consider, this is an internet relationship.
How much do you really know about him? Only what he types in e mails.
Please don't let you or your life fall apart over this. If you are feeling used and abused put a stop to it now. Please don't take that the wrong way. It was said was with kindness.

Having said that, I had a thought. A sensible one too I think. I'll be damned.

At the detox I attended ( all THREE times) my psyc. doctor could prescribe the meds he wanted me to take to detox., instead of their standard drugs. I don't know if this is an option but if it is it might a) get him to the doctor and b) get him back to detox.

He is correct that only the alcoholic can understand the alcoholic, I guess you have to be able to say "been there done that." So please consider the above, written by a true blue alcoholic, in recovery, with a good amount of sober time. It is the same advice I would give to my daughter.

It's time to take care of Net, I think. She is worthy too.

Blessings,

magic xx

[nething4usp]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

Good Morning Magic

Thank you for the advise, and the many good words of wisdom within.

I didn't mean to seem I was surprised that he was drinking again, that seemed the most likely thing to expect after the quick exit from detox., even from someone who's never BTDT, maybe it's I'm still taking in that he left. And yes it is really tough trying to understand it without being able to know a day in his life (and I'm guessing many of those here). In the last few nights when we've actually spoken, it has given me the chance to try to understand it a little more each time, and it has helped me to see I need to only be able to put in the same effort that he is willing, or maybe it is able to....and to be here (I'm hoping) when he decides to continue on the journey of fighting back against the addiction.

I didn't expect that detox alone would magically change his life, that I know is something he has to be willing and committed to doing every for the rest of his life after leaving, ......but for the moment there is two years of emails, with much said in many, it's how I was able to see there was a change in how things were being said, and I do respect him for finally being able to be honest with me on telling me about his addiction, and for saying I don't deserve to be part of his problem...and at no time has he ever painted a "fairy book story" on anything.

Actually when we were talking tonight, he had said his insurance had given him a list of centres/services that they would cover , and I did suggest to him, that if he is waiting until Aug for a return, that he spend free time on weekends, going to them, talking to them about why he left the one he originally went to, and to learn why and if all the meds being given were necessary. So hopefully this is on the same direction you are suggesting, and will encourage him to get the meds prescribed in advance.

Over the past week, and especially the last few nights, I have to give him the benefit of the doubt, by what he has said, and the reason's he cant go back now, that he will be returning to detox in Aug. And have to keep believing, that of all things said, this is as true as him admitting he is an alcoholic, and he really does want to find a way to live with this disease sober. Although only 6 - 9 weeks away ( which I'm already feeling will be very very long weeks) until he is planning to go, I could never walk away now....not only for him, but especially for myself, as I have promised to help in any way I could....and I can't let myself down by breaking that promise, because it isn't going to be easy to keep. Maybe it is me in the fairy tale world, but I don't think so, he's been there for me over these past two years when I've needed him, if only just to be a friend and make a bad day seem a little better.

Your words have not gone unfelt and are appreciated, and hopefully I'm not making a mistake for waiting it out a few more months.....that's when I'll know whether to stay or go. I don't think the book I ordered and printed has arrived yet...but expecting it will show up this week.....and after talking to him tonight, did with a lot of questions as to if I should have, ordered the starter kit of supplements from the site. Hopefully he'll have the use of these for at least 6 weeks before going back to detox, and they will help in the process and we'll have to see where we / I go from there.

Thanks for ALL the sensible thoughts you have shared

Have a great day

[stevewm]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

detox centers= living hell.

nething4usp;155983 wrote: Steve

I'm so sorry to hear about your experience, but truly appreciate you sharing it with me/us.
The person I am concerned about is someone I met in a game room 2 years ago, and we have shared nightly emails ever since. Especially in the last 18 months we have talked more about our personal lives, I'm not sure how far back in this thread you read, my original post was in Family/Friends....and then suddenly out of the blue he admitted to me that the sudden change of tone in emails was that he was an alcoholic. About 3 weeks after telling me this I got an email at 8.30 AM his time he was admitting himself to detox.

Your experience echo's almost identically word for word his experience there, with the exception that he was not with seniors....but it seems that all but 3 of those at centre were there for asst drug addictions. He left after about 30 hours and it was because of the "zombie" all the meds he had to take he became. There seems to have been some initial benefits to his experience there, the greatest one I have seen is that after 2 years of emails, he finally called me and we have spoken on the phone the last 4 nights for at least 3 hours at a time. Unfortunately, since leaving detox early Tues evening, I know of at least 3 "relapses" of old habits, and there is possible more....he has a long term project he has been working on at work for the past 8 months or more, and completion is scheduled for Aug.....he keeps telling me when either sober or after drinking that his intention is to return to same centre in Aug of this year when work project will be completed, but that he will speak to them first about the amount of drugs administered, and a few other concerns he had. My biggest concerns are 1) after the experience will he go back 2) he is a very caring and considerate person to others he comes in contact with, and I am very concerned that when/if he goes back....his attention will be given to those around him, and will again have an unsuccessful attempt in detox.

It seems at this time, he does not want to try any alternatives, Drs. advise/meds, psychologist, acupuncture, my way out program....and keeps telling me is determined to try as best he can to get through to Aug...and re-enter same detox centre.

He keeps reminding me that only alcoholics can understand what this disease is, but appears grateful that I'm trying with all my heart and thoughts to understand, as I believe he is ready to quit/moderate his drinking, because of the destruction it has caused in many aspects of his life. Without question he is right, the more he tells me, the more I question.
My hope is to try to find a way of even understanding a small aspect of his life,
my fear is .....will the determination to quit that had him self admit himself, and his disappointed of his experience, not lead him back there in Aug.


I truly appreciate you sharing your experience.....and hope you also keep finding a way to add 1 day more, everyday to AF days.

best of luck to you and your family.

{Steve comments}

Thank you for your comments and most of all concern.

I will never enter another detox center that turns its patients into WALKING ZOMBIES.The meds can be very disruptive during your stay.They were giving me only God and them knows but it is not natural for your heart to speed away and them having no concern.

First off they were detoxing me off from alcohol only.I have been on by a doctor 0.5 mg of klonopin twice daily by my doc for panic attacks for 9 months.I have had them since 1985.The treatment center completely refused me this medication and stopping it cold turkey it can cause sezures and the 1/2 life is long and you wean over months by the directions of a doctor that they clearly ignored.Second off I have been on lortab and tylox for pain after my near fatal welding truck crash 3/9/07 and crushing my middle finger that severed a flexor tendon and fractured the bone a month later.

I also take prevacid 30 mg twice daily for chronic acid reflux disease that they also denied me.I also take 50 mg of tenormin for blood pressure and heart rate control and they denied this and drove my blood pressure and heart rate to the roof.

This treatment center was discharging patients because their insurance ran out even though they were not completely detoxed and Zombie-ized and let go with no prescriptions to help them wean off.Anyone thinking off going to brentwood hospital in shreveport La better think again they will ruin your health and drain your insurance money dry so it tells me they are after a fast dollar not the patients recovery.

Thank you for listening.

Steve.
Into my 5th day of sobriety.

[Breez]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

Congrats on 5 days Steve!

[beatle]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

holy shit. just came onto this thread now.

Ok, steve, yes, detox centres can be hell (I've experienced a few myself). What are these people thinking? They are supposed to be helping you? No, I think they are like factories, just get the drugs/alcohol out of your system and send you out on the street. No, they do not care about you personally, why should they, you are just another addict. I guess they can be of service if you are really far gone and absolutely need those drugs to get you over withdrawal. However, if you are a concerned, thinking person, like most of those on this site, who is actually trying to do something about what they recognise as a big problem, the detox centres are not for you. However, that said, I at least managed to tell the people when I was in detox that I didn't want all those meds that made me a zombie and they said, ok, we can't make you take it if you don't want to. That helped. I took some of the meds (that I had researched from before I entered the second time) and refused the others. It worked out ok for me. But the rest was hell, anyway. Yeah, kind of like being a prisoner. The dread of going back keeps me halfway sober.

My big point, though, is that detox, in my opinion and experience, probably can be done fairly safely at home. I am not a doctor or anyone with expertise in this area except first-hand experience. You just need to be prepared and have someone you trust with you the whole time (usually at least 3 days). btw, many doctors concur with this and home detox is becoming more and more common.

nething4usp, we have been in contact before about this. I can tell you that everything Magic and Steve say are true. So I won't repeat. I just want to say that from what I hear, your friend may not be so off bat to say he wants to wait till after he's done with the project. If he is trying to moderate and is willing to detox after he's done with the project, I would trust him, but I'm just saying that from my personal experience. I've been in that boat and really did have to get through one thing before I could attack the other. No, you will never know what it's like to be an alcoholic, but you can learn to see how they behave, and give them your trust when you know they really want to get control.

[nething4usp]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

Thank you Beatle, I think that is the track he is on at the moment, that to get through this long term project, and then be able to focus on the detox. He seems prepared to accept the "Prison Type" approach that seems to be part of the process of the centres, and I have been trying to find ways of saying there has to be a structured environment as each person who enters does so with different needs, stages, attitude and comittment to the program, so to maintain some type of control of the centre there has to be rules in place, and hopefully they will be flexible with those that don't excessively abuse the rules, and after giving time for the staff to see/know what you are prepared to give will make allowances providing there is a safe structure for everyone there. He has already said the things he would take with him next time, which he wasn't told he could bring on first experience ie books - Ipod - crosswords - I think perhaps whatever panicked him to jump in so quickly (although there is indications that some background work had been done)
but think maybe just ran in a little to quickly, and then panic took over when he lost control of the meds being given, and felt out of control because of them. He has said he was hoping to be able to talk with staff there to what/how/when/why all these things, but the zombie state did not allow him to function to do so. I had suggested perhaps because he didn't get past 1.5 or maybe a few more hours, that he ran before that would have been available.....there seems to be many reasons for not working ....but the encouraging thing is he still feels he needs, and wants to return very soon. The reasons for the delays are very legitimate....I have been updated almost daily on the successes and setbacks of the project at work.

I still have faith and trust in what he tells me, (even knowing there is probably so very much I will never be told) and honestly believe sober days is what he wants most for himself....since we have actually been talking and had real conversations,
they have allowed me to ask the things I want to know about, both for my own sanity,
and to try to be as helpful as possible while he has decisions to make, and wants the second opinion, even if it's that of an outsider to this world....but as a supporting a caring friend. And it is such a help and relief to be able to read what the members here post, so everything is not always being heard and seen for the first time by me , and helping me to learn very quickly - he's not alone and so much of what he is going through, is just how the alcohol can take over one's life, and the challenges of the fight to get it back.

:thanks:

Hope the day is a good one for you

[stevewm]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

All I can say is it sounds like most detox centers are the same but maybe not?

I have been out since friday and my mind still feels messed up from the treatment centers meds.I researched on the klonopin that I am on and have been for months twice daily for panic attacks 0.5mg and the center refused it to me and the results could have been fatal on my part by sudden death.One old timer since 1985 sober spoke at a AA Meeting and said out of you 20 here only one will make it and the rest will die drunk or go to prison.

Not very positive information.

Nevertheless I am into my 6th day of sobriety.

God bless and thanks for listening.

Sincerely:Steve.

[morrison]

ANYONE BEEN THROUGH DETOX HELP PLS

Steve, I agree that comment was extremely negative. Sadly, he may be close to accurate with that number. But I always try to be positive. Trends were made to be broken, right? Now, with the knowledge we have, the support, medicine, etc., that 1 out of 20 number should be a thing of the past. I sure hope so. Thanks for the story.