December Army 2022

[mollyka]

Re: December Army 2022

Evening all!
Couldn't get on either & only trying now.

YS went hiking in Wicklow with a pal from Waterford on Friday last - not sure I believe that.
Hasn't been back since. Said he can't deal with his Dad & his anger any more.
Dunno where he is staying - he hasn't told me - and I'm not asking again.
I told him when/if he is sober this is his home and he is welcome back.

If I'm honest it's a relief he's not here. But I'm really not sure how to tell his sister. Putting it off as long as I can.

Can't see what more you can do tbh...can't go running after him ...maybe he'll see where he's at now? Sending hugs xx
What part are you afraid to tell his sister? Is she coming over for Christmas?

[mollyka]

Re: December Army 2022

Good morning

Give up Mary, I have. With 5 dogs running around I looked at it and said feck it, my idea of having it perfect is impossible so if it is good enough that is going to do. I am not stressing. Daughter is going to help put up trees and decorations today and tomorrow and I’ll try and keep it vacuumed and as tidy as is possible. Luckily no visitors just ourselves. Well done on giving the party a miss. We can all do without unnecessary stress.

Poor Satz, you have had enough of it to last a lifetime. It would be nice if he let you know he is ok but you have a right to peace in your own home. Bloody alcohol robs people of so much. Just heard about a cousin yesterday. Only married a year, his brother died of suicide during year and he started drinking to “cope”. Wife has left him and who can blame her.

Hoping to get a walk in this morning. Could really do with it. Am over this cold spell, snow or no snow

Yup..I've had enough of it too...just so bloody cold!
Alcohol is so destructive isn't it! So many families decimated by it..what starts as fun.....??!!

Finished my Christmas shopping...bits and pieces got yesterday so going to relax today and omg can only IMAGINE what 5 dogs do to a house...our menace does enough all on his own!!!

[satz123]

Re: December Army 2022

Can't see what more you can do tbh...can't go running after him ...maybe he'll see where he's at now? Sending hugs xx
What part are you afraid to tell his sister? Is she coming over for Christmas?

Yes she is coming home Molls.
She forked out 6k for last treatment.
She's a worrier and a fixer - so will be devastated and so disappointed it didn't work again.

[mollyka]

Re: December Army 2022

Yes she is coming home Molls.
She forked out 6k for last treatment.
She's a worrier and a fixer - so will be devastated and so disappointed it didn't work again.

But she's presuming he can be 'fixed' isn't she? You and I know he has to fix himself and THEN they can give him the tools to stay fixed...sadly I think he was using her ability and willingness to fork out money as a conduit for getting himself out of trouble...only my thoughts of course...I don't know him but thinking back how my own head may have worked and observing many others in rehab doing exactly that be it trouble with family or trouble with the law.
She'll be okay...its not your fault....NONE of this is your fault...we've a great habit of blaming ourselves for everything!

[rustop59]

Re: December Army 2022

Good morning everyone

Another really cold one. Think the midland counties were going to get the worst of it. Managed to get out on my walk yesterday and it was magical in the snow in the forest. We all felt better afterwards.

Got the trees up too so place getting to look a lot more festive. Think I have all my shopping done just waiting for a few things to be delivered. Hair appointment today.

Hope everyone doing ok. Thinking of those of you going through family situations at the moment. Not easy any time of year but everything seems more intense over the holidays. So much pressure to be happy and jolly and as we all know that’s not possible at times.

[mollyka]

Re: December Army 2022

Good morning everyone

Another really cold one. Think the midland counties were going to get the worst of it. Managed to get out on my walk yesterday and it was magical in the snow in the forest. We all felt better afterwards.

Got the trees up too so place getting to look a lot more festive. Think I have all my shopping done just waiting for a few things to be delivered. Hair appointment today.

Hope everyone doing ok. Thinking of those of you going through family situations at the moment. Not easy any time of year but everything seems more intense over the holidays. So much pressure to be happy and jolly and as we all know that’s not possible at times.

How right you are Rusters...problems don't go away just cos it's Christmas...families don't always suddenly get along cos its Christmas...does seem to accentuate things

Very cold here....BALTIC!!

[satz123]

Re: December Army 2022

.sadly I think he was using her ability and willingness to fork out money as a conduit for getting himself out of trouble...only my thoughts of course...I don't know him but thinking back how my own head may have worked and observing many others in rehab doing exactly that be it trouble with family or trouble with the law.
She'll be okay...its not your fault....NONE of this is your fault...we've a great habit of blaming ourselves for everything!

No I don't believe he really wanted to go into rehab Molls. His sister insisted he accept the offer & I went along with it.
It was really our own fault this time - rather than put him out we took the 'easy' option of getting rid of him for 4 weeks again. But always hopeful this time it would work.
I don't think he wants to stop - or is afraid to stop once started - for fear of withdrawals. ( which are hurroundus including hallucinations & voices he told me one day.)

[satz123]

Re: December Army 2022

So much pressure to be happy and jolly and as we all know that’s not possible at times.

They can stick their fake 'happy & jolly' up their arse Rusters.
I hate that fake side of Christmas - always have done - but this year I have no tolerance for it at all.
It starts this Sunday with meeting SIL & BIL for grub but no doubt lots of alcohol.
Then next week The Germans want us to meet up with a bunch of their friends. To a PACKED pub of course, in the Strawberry Beds, Dublin

I will TRY to be polite - but not promising anything :haha:

[rustop59]

Re: December Army 2022

They can stick their fake 'happy & jolly' up their arse Rusters.
I hate that fake side of Christmas - always have done - but this year I have no tolerance for it at all.
It starts this Sunday with meeting SIL & BIL for grub but no doubt lots of alcohol.
Then next week The Germans want us to meet up with a bunch of their friends. To a PACKED pub of course, in the Strawberry Beds, Dublin

I will TRY to be polite - but not promising anything :haha:

Oh God, that’s my idea of hell. I am lucky that most of my socialising has been lunches and one meal out. His fishing group are having their night out Saturday. There is a meal so I don’t have to cook but think I’ll use the bad roads as my excuse to leave as early as I can.

[JackieClaire]

Re: December Army 2022

Morning,
Thought I'd pop in to see if you're behaving yerselves.

Pa-in-law is still with us. Mr. JC and his sister are with him most of the day. They take turns and nip out and get a sandwich.

[mollyka]

Re: December Army 2022

Hi again...feel for Mr.JC and the sister...it is soul destroying sitting at a hospital bed...as uts going to happen sooner or later I would hope for everyone concerned ...especially Mr.JC's dad....that it'll be sooner.

I'm so privileged that Joe doesn't drink hence doesn't want any of that nonsense...mind you...even when I was drinking I preferred sitting at home at the fire and a movie and a bottle of wine!
Where's Starty? And Elsie? And MrsA??

[starty]

Re: December Army 2022

Hi guys, sorry, I am here
Already finding Christmas stressful and its not even here yet! Shopping, thinking, seeing. All too much.
Didnt bother with works do either and only going to very few fam and friends things. Cant wait for it all to be over really.

Yes even when I was drinking, being at home was preferred. Never was a social butterfly at all. Think the drink made me feel like I might possibly fit somewhere. It didnt and I dont. Happy with that now.

When my mum was ill I think I shut Mr S out too. All I could focus on was her and the situation. I think its common really. Its such a difficult time for everyone.

[mollyka]

Re: December Army 2022

Hi guys, sorry, I am here
Already finding Christmas stressful and its not even here yet! Shopping, thinking, seeing. All too much.
Didnt bother with works do either and only going to very few fam and friends things. Cant wait for it all to be over really.

Yes even when I was drinking, being at home was preferred. Never was a social butterfly at all. Think the drink made me feel like I might possibly fit somewhere. It didnt and I dont. Happy with that now.

When my mum was ill I think I shut Mr S out too. All I could focus on was her and the situation. I think its common really. Its such a difficult time for everyone.

I always find Christmas stressful...my antisocial head goes galloping...that even includes family (mind you someone is always narking with my lot!)
That's why this year I thought we could cocoon down here in the warmth of just each other...not to be ...but sure if they didn't want us we'd be whinging as well!!!
Spent the morning layering up my raised beds...cardboard twigs newspapers woodash compost ...rinse and repeat...Max thinks its Disney land....stuff being dragged out as quick as it goes in!

[satz123]

Re: December Army 2022

[MENTION=7008]JackieClaire[/MENTION]. Is he maybe holding on for his wife to go see him - is she able to do that ? Leave the Nursing Home?
Maybe she's there everyday - in that case my romantic idea of him holding on for his beloved - is just rubbish :haha:

[mollyka]

Re: December Army 2022

[MENTION=7008]JackieClaire[/MENTION]. Is he maybe holding on for his wife to go see him - is she able to do that ? Leave the Nursing Home?
Maybe she's there everyday - in that case my romantic idea of him holding on for his beloved - is just rubbish :haha:

Oh I'm sure they bring her over to him...so sad after all their years together.

Morning all...it is truly FREEZING here this morning...First day I woke with a cold FACE!!!