I still get that 'dread' feeling

[Bella]

Good morning to you all. After 3 months of not seriously drinking, I STILL wake up every morning with this awful 'dreaded' feeling. Its like, the minute I am aware of being awake I suddenly ask myself the question, " Did I drink yesterday? Did I do anything wrong?" "Is everything okay?" Then I blissfully realise that " No, I did not drink and my world is still okay and normal". That bit of it is such a relief. Everything in my life was so chaotic a few months ago and now I have reached a pleasant calm. But..............obviously, old habits die hard!
Maybe one day, I will wake up and feel differently, I dont know. But it is good in a way, because it keeps me on my toes and I willl hopefully never forget those suicidal memories of waking up and remembering some horrendous incident from the night before!

Thankyou for reading this. Bella xxx

[tawnyfrog]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

Hey Bella - the bad news is .... even after 16 months of not seriously drinking, I still on occasion wake up with the dreaded "OMG - what did I do last night/ who did I phone/what did I buy" raging, jump-out-of-bed paranoia.

Then, when fully awake, I realise I've done absolutely nothing untoward!!

That's the good news.

[Keepon!!!!]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

Hi Bella well done for coming this far already when you do wake up and realise you didnt drink be proud of yourself and get outta bed with a smile on your face you deserve it and i think time will heal the past so you can concerntrate on today !!!!!!

Luv Keepon:h

[SKendall]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

Hi Bella, I get those thoughts too, when being a.f. for a while. Weird isn't it?

[irishlady]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

Hi Bella,
The way you feel is totally normal, it takes a long time sometimes to re-train the brain, especially when you first wake up and the old brain still hasn't engaged all the gears so it slips into what it has known from past behaviour.. Don't worry though, it will come..

Sometimes I'll wake from a deep sleep in the eary hours of the morning and lie there thinking back to the night before, and the relief when I realise it was just another NORMAL sober night.. Isn't that pleasant calm feeling wonderful ??

Keep up the good work,

Love, Louise xxx

[rachel28]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

im still trying to work out how i got home sat, what i said an if i was a twat, good job bf cant remember either, as i most likely was, i drank more than bf, well done to u 4 bein af free for so long, mayb it takes part of your memory to recover, mayb its imprinted on your brain 4 a while, the O M G feeling, im sure it will go away, at least u can shake your head an realise that in fact no u were good , i cant wait 4 tyhat day,

[Guest]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

3 mths. of not seriously drinking Bella, and 16 mths. is fantastic tawny.

Am a real novice, just entering my 3rd. wk. of mods. and some mornings I wake up a little disorientated and have to prompt myself to realise I didn`t drink the night before. Guess I was just so used to drinking every night, I`m kind of in disbelief on waking.

Starlight Impress

[rachel28]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

u done realy well both of u, hope to say the same soon xx

[luc]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

Bella, you describe the OMG wake up syndrome perfectly - I had it just this morning even accompanied by headaches, and disorientation, yet I didn't touch a drop yesterday - but I had to think it through before I was convinced it was just the old old familiar feeling here to haunt 'n taunt me. Well done on your af, I slipped up on Saturday.........
luc

[ScoobyDoo]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

Bella, I reckon that's a great thing actually! A fabulous reminder that you're now AF. Keep it up chicken-pie!

xo

[uda]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

Bella, I totally recognise that! It reminds me of the syndrome you get for a while when waking up after losing someone dear to you but in a very, very good way. Then you have 'forgotten' in your sleep that you've lost this person and the reality hits you very hard and painfully. With the drinking it's wonderful because you have the moment of dread and then the good feeling! Don't like the dread but love it when realisation dawns.

Take care
Uli

[diamond]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

Me too, I thought it was only me!! LOL

I wake up and look around to make sure I'm even in my bedroom !!!!!

[adagirl]

I still get that 'dread' feeling

I had that happen to me a couple times since being on the MWO program. I woke up w/a dry mouth which brings me back to when I'd wake up w/a dry mouth from drinking too much. And, then I realized, no I didn't drink too much last night, no I am not hungover, no I don't have to check to see if my car is in the garage, no I didn't do anything crazy last night that I have to try to piece together by calling all my friends... I JUST have a dry mouth! LOL