i said i might!

[rachel28]

i said i might!

thanks bella, yes thought of it last night, no sleep, makes me come out with things like that, thats the 1st poem i ever showed any 1 since school, i got tons of em i scribbled down, over yrs to ex s , if i write a letter it always goes on an on, so i ve always done a poem, stil goes on an on but, less ranting cos i got to think about trying to get it to rhyme an make sense!! i hope ill b on track soon, would b a first, have to admit, bf went bed an i opened the brandy last nite, an its goin down sweet, every gulp my body s feelin better but my head is screaming NO NO NO , got work later, xxx

[rachel28]

i said i might!

who the fxxk am i kidding ,

[beatle]

i said i might!

great poem rachel. someday, I want to be your agent. Let's both kick this devil first.
p.s. I'm not kidding

[rachel28]

i said i might!

beatle im so scared i woke up cryin, nearly cried at work an proper cryin now, i dont know how i can do this, im screwed, xx its jst hit me,

[Kitty]

i said i might!

Don't cry Rachel, things are going to improve for you very soon I just know it. Just 2 more days now and you will have your results and get the help you need and so deserve.

Hang in there, you are going through a scary time but you have been so brave.

Lovely poem by the way.

Try and lay off the brandy because I think it depresses you.

Keep strong,

Kitty :l

[rachel28]

i said i might!

i havent cried like this for so long, i cant stop, an i ve sobered up 4 now, not long got bk from work, should go to a cleaning job but i cant not like this, got no credit to ring, just spent money on beer, fxxk, fxxk, fxxk, 2 days an i ll prob fxxk that up cos im so scared, every bit of hope i had seems to of vanished an i dont know y, im sorry xx

[rachel28]

i said i might!

great my boy came bk early, seen me crying, what next, xx

[beatle]

i said i might!

what next? Just think about the next few minutes, the next few hours. Just be nice to your boy. Tell him you are sick and you are going to get better. Yeh. That's what I've been saying to my kids and they seem to understand. (They are a little younger, though, so maybe it's easier to pull things over on them). But Rachel, you are on your way. you ARE going to get better. And your kid WILL understand. It's ok for parents to cry. It makes it easier for kids to cry. And we all need to cry. Two more days now. Just keep doing the best you can. We are all here for you.

[luc]

i said i might!

Rachael - I did like your signature, but what's this one all about. By the time I catch on you'll have probably changed it again to "MWO's most Prolific Popular Posting Poetess" or something suitably outrageous.

Stop crying, and get yourself together. Make a decision, if you've got a job to go to, why not try and get your head around it and go.You've probably got a meal to prepare later for your boy and b/f and of course you - you tell us about every last drop of poison you pour down you gullet - don't you ever eat ? Never a mention of a decent pastie - I thought you were a fine Cornish maid !!

Seriously and lighter now, cheer up Rachael, only a couple of days to go now - stay safe this evening.

luc
x

[sujul]

i said i might!

Rachel, darlin--you are feeling overwhelmed by all the changes you are experiencing--it's not surprising that you are crying--you are dealing with a lot right now...:l Crying is a sign that you are ready to get well...

But there are a couple of little things that might help you feel better...

Okay--this will sound silly but PLEASE just do this... Breathe in as slowly and as deeply as you possibly can--go on, fill up your lungs...now hold that breath for a moment, hold it, hold it....now, slowly blow out all the air, empty your lungs completely....do this 2 more times....

It may sound really silly, but when we're feeling panicky and anxious we literally don't talk in enough air and it makes us feel even worse...breathing in slowly not only gives you the air you need but it helps you to slow down and get a grip so that you can think more clearly.....

When you've finished your deep breaths, go and splash some cold water on your face and the back of your neck...cold, cold, cold....it will help you to get yourself grounded and centered...you won't feel like you're spinning out of control....

I have felt like you do now many, many times...the only way to GET through it is to GO through it--there are no shortcuts. Also, know that this is normal for the situation you are in, that you can do some things right away to help yourself feel better and, best of all, that you WILL get through this!! You will get through this because you MUST and because you CAN!

Rachel--you are SO ready to get well--you are a wonderful, smart, funny lady who is going through a hard time right now...treat yourself gently like a newborn baby and take it one step at a time...one second at a time....

Hugs from New York--we really are all here for you! :l :l

[southernbelle47]

i said i might!

Oh yes you CAN......think that is....
Take Su's advice and breathe deep.......
Splash water and eat something with protien and good carbs..

You can do more than you think!
Nancy )

[magic]

i said i might!

Hi Rachel,

Still weepy?
Poor soul. You can do this, of course you can. You are one terrific lady.

If you are worried that you won't get the support that you need from your boyfriend ask the doctor about a hospital stay. You deserve some TLC. Take your own pillow though, and jammies.

Deep breaths, cold water, good food.

Rachel, you are a treat. We see it.

Another hug, sweetpea. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.......

magic xx

[betty boop]

i said i might!

Ooooh Rachel.....

First of all the poem is amazing, how talented you are ......

Ditto on ditching the brandy, it is a depressant ......

Deep breaths, try to relax ......

Hugs from me too .....

BB xx

[rachel28]

i said i might!

hi a im bk, so much thanks guys, im sorry, just all hit me at once, i been so positive then boom, prob cos i dont eat a lot, or cos yesterday i ate lots an thats what done it, SHOCK TO THE SYSTEM,, no pasties tho luc, an ass master was cos i was gonna go stick my head up my ass, best place 4 it,, told my boy i was cryin cos of period pains,, he knows all about them, i made sure, so his wife one day may get some sympathy!!! god i feel like a right nob now,, i had to pull myself together,,,,, 2 police men looking 4 my step son, he smashed all windows in sports center, DRUNK, got 2 go 4 interview with him 2morrow, oh it never rains it pours in cornwall, but thank u all 4 gettin me thru AGAIN xxxxxxxx

[vegan]

i said i might!

Hi Rachel,
How are u feeling now? What the hell is going on with your step son? I have a 16 year old stepson live with me and i'd kill him if he'd done that!
Where in Cornwall are u? I'm coming down there in sept. I'm staying near Helston. Do u know it? Hope your feeling ok anyway,
Charlotte xxx