OUCH IT HURTS

[YoungAtHeart]

OUCH IT HURTS

I hope he goes on the wagon, Ima, but stay alert. If he's only doing it for you, he might still be self-absorbed and now feel victimized too! Yikes! I hope that he sees the light and understands what a great deal he is getting.

Stay strong sweetie!

Hugs,:l
Kathy

[imatree]

OUCH IT HURTS

Last night I poured a 1.5 liter bottle of wine and 5 beers down the drain before going to bed. This morning he was ready for the shakes and anxiety attacks (he'll have some DT's due to the amount he drinks). He knows what to expect, has done this before. He dug out the valerian root, which he'll use the first couple days to keep calm. Stocking up on ginger ale. I gave him a bottle of kudzu and L-glut, told him to take 3-4 times each day, and how to break open L-glut and put under tongue for killer cravings.

I think he is doing this largely to save the relationship, though he wouldn't say that. But he also has spoken some here and there about how his liver hurts sometimes, and he fears diabetes, etc, all the same stuff we all fear and wish to be free from.

I'll do what I can to support him but I will not take responsibiltiy for his getting sober or not getting sober. I have my own sobriety to deal with. Today I expect will be my first AF day in months.

If he doesn't get sober and stay sober he has to leave. It's going to be a few weeks before he can get a place anyway so we'll see how it goes.

[diamond]

OUCH IT HURTS

Ima I wish you all the best, I really do, no-one has tried like you have with him, if he can do this then you may have a future together, I wish you can, because we know you love him, but the booze has to go, doesn't it?

I pray he does stay stopped for you and your daughter's sake.

Bless,

Diamondxx

[Saint Jude]

OUCH IT HURTS

:goodjob: I'll be keeping you both in my thoughts & prayers!:h

[Sweet Cheeks]

OUCH IT HURTS

Ima,

You are so strong - I'm not sure I wouldn't have given up by now, but I can understand the reasons why you haven't.

You are being sooo brave, but I hope for your sake he is serious this time. As you say, you have to focus on number 1, and your daughter.

I look at my kids and realise how stupid I've been to turn to alcohol every time I have a problem. There are other people alot worse off than me and they find other ways to cope with the bad days - hopefully we can all find the inner strength to find a way out of this fog.

Good luck and we're all thinking of you
Sweet

[YoungAtHeart]

OUCH IT HURTS

I'm thinking of you and your boyfriend, Ima, and wondering how it's going. Lots of prayers coming at you, sweetie!

[Reenie]

OUCH IT HURTS

IMA: Follow your gut instinct. If you truly feel you can live a sober life without the your boyfriend, you must move on. You must think of your well being and your daughter's. I understand this is a painful decision, yet once made, and once you move on, time will heal all wounds and you will be grateful for it. You and your daughter must come first. Good luck... I feel for you.

[happycamper68]

OUCH IT HURTS

I anticipate the same vicious cycle if he stays. I think you need to do this separately and see how it goes after that. I really think your initial decision was right. It came from your maternal instincts and your gut and what you truly know about him and his ability to do this forever. :h

[Bean]

OUCH IT HURTS

Hi Ima
I broke up with my boyfriend last September for a number of reasons but our drinking habits were a big one. He had spent nearly 2 years telling me I didn't have a problem, he didn't have a problem, always encouraging me to drink even when I'd said I wasn't going to and so on...we all know how it works...
It was without doubt the most painful thing I have ever been through. I cried every day for months, had panic attacks etc. Many a time I wondered if I had done the right thing and just bailed out on the relationship through fear or I don;t know what. Ending things is REALLY hard, the grief, the sadness, loneliness can be overwhelming but if your gut instinct tells you it's the right thing to do, then stick with it. I think deep down we always know what is the right answer. I am feeling better and better every day now and I think the relationship and everything that's happened since made me take a long hard look at myself and start living the life I really want to. Still a long way to go but I am on my way!
Keep coming here for support and I am confident you will get through this.
Wish you well for this new step. Bean x