Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

[Suzanna]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Hi all, yes very meaty stuff FMF, I found Getting Unstuck in the itunes store for 7.95 American. That is so very untechie I know. Thank you for the recommendation and info MM.

[Kyna]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Nancy,
Thanks so much for posting this quote. I have read and cogitated on it for a long while and there's so much in it, very profound. When Things Fall Apart was with me during my first stint in detox, so it also got me through some hard times, and offered great hope. I very much feel that the Buddhist teachings are a great anchor for me - so feel free to post more about your current reading ... I for one would enjoy it.

I guess I've never thought about drinking as a way of making things more predictable before. Yet that's just what happens. That six-pack of cider I kept pouring into myself on a daily basis for most of last year was nothing if not predictable. And the bourbon, and the wine before that. And the outcome is too after you've done it a few times.

Lots to think on,
Kyna

[trixietrack]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

The media pushes artificial happiness or a twisted idea of what happiness should be.
when you see an ad or a commercial on TV or a hollywood movie which to me is also pure advertising your first gut emotion is envy.
Envy will make anyone crave like crazy. That is what keeps capitalism alive.
I think that modern society is confusing achievement of the unattainable for happiness.
hence all the depression and unhappiness

This post is very inspiring

[nancy]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

i agree with you trixie. And have you seen the big-seller the Secret? I watched the DVD. What a scam.

I think this fits with a capitalistic society very well (though I am no socialist). If you think about it, it also fits with addiction, the idea that we can never get enough, we should have all we want and we should be happy and comfortable all the time. It fits with obesity too, which is a big problem in this country.

Kyna: The book I quoted doesn't have a lot on addiction. I think that quote was pulled from one of her other books. But it does talk a lot generally about gaining the ability to be at home with uncomfortable feelings with ourselves. I think a lot of our problems stem from the fact that we can't deal with feelings adequately. Also, the book suggests that we can find connectedness in not running away from these things because in facing them, we become at one with all the other people in the world who are suffering.

As for the initial quote, you might also want to check out what I wrote about Craig Nakken's book, Addictive Personality. I wrote an old thread about it, maybe in the What We are Reading section of this website. He wrote about seeking predictable responses through addictive behaviors. Unlike people, substances are always there for us and give us relief in the same way every time. This appeals to those of us who may feel let down in our relationships, hurt or disappointed in unreliable people. I know from my own experience, the effect is magnified if you have low self esteem and are relying on that external validation, only to be hurt and to react with excessive sensitivity.

But the relief from substances or excessive behaviors is temporary and not real like what you would get from a human contact. I think this seeking of something predictable also fits with the proverbial hole in the soul common to alcoholics. I think if we understand that relationships are by their very nature changing and impermanent, we might be less likely to drown ourselves in a destructive substances.

[Bettelove]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

I've also been listening to Pema Chodron on my ipod. I came across this great article she wrote "How to Work with Addictions" here's the link.
Pema Ch?dr?n
Shambhala - Vision, Lineage, Meditation, Community is a great site.

[Guest]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Hi Nancy and thanks for starting this thread. As I`m beginning to feel my life is truly far better without the booze, I realize that I have a heck of a lot of work to do on my inner-self.........basically, I`m searching for an inner calm.......some sort of ability to really chill and allow all of life`s crap to simply wash over me.

Satori, thanks for posting your link to basic Buddhist meditation. Am at a loss though, as I don`t know the first thing about meditating, I really need to read the instructions as to what I`m supposed to do from the screen, which is proving somewhat difficult with my eyes either closed, or focussed on a particular spot a few feet in front of me.lol

Could anyone recommend a meditation CD to make things a little easier?.........would prefer to purchase a "tried and tested" one, rather than just pick one up at random, because it sports a pretty cover!!! lol

Much appreciated,

Starlight Impress x

[xtexan]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Starlight:

I wrote a long set of posts last year on an alternative you may wish to consider.

Heres the link:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f60/brain-waves-booze-another-tool-you-consider-5793.html

This works for me quite well, and I still use it regularly to "chill out".

As to Nancy's sentiments, I've often said, when you get above a certain level of physical comfort, is it really the purpose of our lives to ruthlessly acquire more material goods and political power? The vast majority of the human race seems to be tuned into that very thinking. More and more, is never enough. Keeping up with the Jones'. The never ending game of one-upmanship. Rich men passing through eyes of needles, and so on.

Neil

[Guest]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Neil,
Thanks for your reply.......the link in your post leads to such a wealth of information. Being the typical "arty-farty" type, I recall looking at some of your earlier posts a while back and feeling I didn`t possess the required analytical skills to allow me to relate to, or grasp the scientific content of some of your posts........I was still drinking back then and had very little patience.........just wanted someone/thing to "fix " me. I no longer feel out of my depth or in any way overwhelmed by the scientific aspect of those posts now and find I actually understand what you`re getting at. Previously, I wasn`t even aware of there being several different types of brain waves........was most ignorant of what is, after all, my own head!!.......and since quitting the booze, I`ve now concluded that......... rather a f***** up head it is too!!! lol

Having quit the drink relatively recently, I really only now appreciate that quitting is very much only the beginning, and that I need to heal myself in every respect........guess I have my work cut out for me.Your machine interests me a great deal and I intend to do a lot more reading up on this as time allows......as you say, if rapidly flashing lights can provoke a seizure in an epileptic, then obviously these machines effectively alter the brain waves and can allow us to reach the relaxed state of mind I so covet. Am amazed to understand how one`s state of mind can be improved in this way, without having to resort to meds.

Starlight Impress x

[Finding My Self]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

I can't pick anyone out here coz I am soooooooh grateful to everyone for links, posts and quotations that have been put in 'Favourites', cut and pasted, printed and stuck up and saved to the poota...

Just lovely stuff - thanks.

I know - done loads of The Secret stuff coz at least being positive and imaging what you want instead of what you don't want makes sense to me...but that was 15 years ago to the present and I'm still nearly bankrupt, un-married, still renting a house not owning (like one does in the UK! Not being that greedy!) and my Mum, being the most neggy, miserable, worried, thinking of nothing but disasters bod, is rich, still married, having holidays and still alive at 82!!!
So, hmmmm! Not sure myself about this old secret!!! And I certainly don't like the greed aspect of it. Going to go on thinking positive though - just better all round. And go on reading and 'allowing' the things Eastern to sink in...

Thanks again everyone....great thread. One day I'll post with rather better use of the English language than I have here! Apologies.

Love FMF x

[Justin Time]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Nancy,

Pema Chodron is great. I have read several other of her books but had not seen what you posted here. Great quote- thanks for putting it here.

I recommend any of her books. Highly readable and bring some complex Buddhist concepts to simple terms modern people can grasp.

[Finding My Self]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Hey Justin - welcome!!! Yup, I love Pema's words esp on this....

Good luck to you...see you 'on the boards' !

Love FMFxx

[looking for peace]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Nancy, I really love your post. I had to bump it up because I feel I really need that message pounded into me. I printed it out and keeping it nearby. We have to remember that alcohol does the exact opposite of what we have been conditioned to believe it does. It doesn't bring happiness, it brings misery. It doesn't give us relief, it causes the problem that we need relief from. I can especially relate to the part about having to relieve even the slightest discomfort. Giving into an urge as soon as there's an energy shift. I like how Pema Chdron encourage us to stay with it, not to try to jump out of the frying pan as soon as it get a little hot. I need to go back through some of my Pema Chodron posts. Thanks.

[RedThread12]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

What we think of as "happiness" and the authentic Buddhist understanding of happiness are pretty different. I did a 5 week retreat last summer with one of the Dalai Lama's close friends, who has been an interpreter for him for decades. He said, "The Dalai Lama wakes up every morning with the full realization that he has utterly failed in his effort to free his people from the oppression of the Chinese. Yet he remains the most compassionate and happy person I've ever been with."

Matthieu Ricard, another close friend of the Dalai Lama's, has been dubbed "the world's happiest man," based on the way he has, literally, developed the "well-being" structures of his brain through meditation, as seen via fMRI imaging. He's not particularly delighted with that title, and makes the point whenever he can that "happiness" has nothing to do with any external conditions. It is a state of being that can be intentionally cultivated.

Pema's lovely. Thich Nhat Hahn is lovely. There has been a group of scientists and teachers working with and around the Dalai Lama for 25 years. He, and they, have published some a-mazing material about HOW to cultivate well-being. Mind & Life Institute — Building a scientific understanding of the mind to reduce suffering and promote well-being is a great place to find out the amazing extent to which THIS Dalai Lama is committed to bringing western scientific scrutiny and validation to Buddhist understanding and practices. Mind-blowing stuff about the "neuroplasticity" of the brain. Sharon Begley wrote a great book about these efforts: "Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain."

Dan Rather did a series of interviews and talks with a number of people who are making phenomenal break-throughs in medicine and psychiatry utilizing Buddhist-based knowledge (including a talk with the Dalai Lama): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkXtz72hjDI[/video]]Dan Rather Reports - Mind Science (Part 1 of 6) - YouTube for part 1. You can find the remaining 6 from there, I think.

A lot of the books that are published with the Dalai Lama as the author are actually conversations and discussions with these scientists. Amazon carries them: Amazon.com: The Mind's Own Physician: A Scientific Dialogue with the Dalai Lama on the Healing Power of Meditation (9781572249684): Jon Kabat-Zinn PhD, Richard Davidson PhD: Books Amazon.com: Destructive Emotions: A Scientific Dialogue with the Dalai Lama (9780553381054): Daniel Goleman: Books

Robert Thurman is a very close friend of the Dalai Lama and an eminent scholar. You can find a little talk he did on TED, as well as a much more interesting one by Matthieu Ricard, "The Habits of Happiness:" http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/en/mat...f_happiness.ht

The deal is, as I'm sure you guys know . . . this isn't just "feel good" stuff. It's forthright information about rigorous practice, and transformation from the inside out. Thoughts themselves can be completely addictive!! I'm so grateful to be living in a time when this knowledge . . . through the Dalai Lama and so many amazing and authentic teachers, is available.

[nancy]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

revived buddhist thread!

Great to see this old thread revived! It was written at a time when I was first discovering how Buddhist philosophy could help with psych problems. I've come a long way since then and still see the enormous value of being able to tolerate things. It's not just tolerating though, it's also about the way you view your thoughts. I read in a Jon Kabat-Zinn book that when you are depressed your thinking is highly inaccurate What a relief!

Negative thinking/depression/anxiety is a very big driver for addiction in some people and it isn't any excuse. Who wouldn't want to escape that? So how do you get to the point where you ignore that inaccurate thinking? There is literature about meditation to change this pattern. What if you can't tolerate meditation? Just letting the new philosophy into your life will help and in combination with psychotherapy could tip you over the edge toward mental health. Another part of Buddhist thinking that helped me in the past was extending love to yourself and others. The self part was hardest.

I hope to check out the links in the most recent posts.

I think it's important to get a female point of view on these issues. I recently reread some literature from Jean Kirkpatrick's Women For Sobriety program and it was so different from AA. It was focused on believing in yourself, building yourself, building self-esteem. It was so different from AA's analysis of character defects and admitting powerlessness. I am not an expert but I think that examining character defects would be more appropriate for a problem with egotism. And I think women drink for different reasons, often low self-esteem. Examining character defects is what got us into a mess.

Cheers again to Roberta Jewell and My Way Out.

[Kradle123]

Buddhist philosophy about impermanence and addiction

Wow.
How wonderful to find this thread here at MWO!

I have practiced Nichiren Buddhism for 17 years. It is based on The Lotus Sutra considered the highest teaching of shakyamuni gautama buddha. The focus is on our doing our personal Human Revolution and AL certainly got in the way of that a lot! But AL for me really helped bury what in Buddhism is called our Fundamental darkness or the personal karma which stops you from doing your Human Revolution: Achieving your highest potential or your mission in this lifetime...Looking at myself has been very hard for me especially the deeper I go..And of course life gets in there, Devils of the sixth Heaven...Hate those!
(these are forces which get in the way of my practice...AL anyone?)

I love the discussion on Happiness. So many poeple think it's an idle pursuit even though it's in our constitution (and it was a great movie!) But there are 2 types: Relative happiness (that's the looking for love in all the wrong places one ) and then Absolute happiness. That's the indestructable happiness you referenced about the Dalai Lama. One of my oldest Budhha buddies said it best: As Buddhists we still have a lot of problems in our lives, we're just happier about them!

Anyway, Thanks for continuing this thread.

Hugs,
:l