Hi Nattie,
Yes I too have been in thesame situation as you when you feel so guilty because you've let yourself and others down.
The first step, as alot of people have said is being honest with yourself and your boyfriend. It doesn't happen overnight and since I've actually woken up and smelt the coffee, I've faltered a bit, but my husband actually said to me a week or so ago - he was impressed with me as I'd actually recognised the signs that I was reaching the level where you should actually stop drinking.
A small milestone but a very important one and with the help and support of everyone here (you get tons of valuable advice and yes everyone does care), you will do it. Even if you can have one AF day this week it's a huge achievement and there will be plenty of pats on the back along the way.
Good luck
Sweet
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