I am at the end...or as I like to see it today...the BEGINNING.
A bit of my story...
I think I have a problem, several, actually...
I drink 7-14 drinks a day and usually start around 1:00. Some days i start as early as 11:00. I smoke 1/2 pack a day too and have an eating disorder...(I dont eat all day till about 9:00 at night at which time i binge) 9 times out of 10 I dry heave for an hour every morning...then I get dressed and go to my business, pretending all is well...my staff has no clue...exept that I am gaining weight at an alarming speed!! I am 85 pounds overweight and at 42 with all my other issues I am a prime candidate for a heart attack or stroke. I am married with one 11yr old child and keep my problems quite hidden from both of them. My husband knows something is wrong...but still buys me alcohol and smokes to soothe me. All of this has prompted me to seek help. I have been seeing a therapist for about 8 weeks now and we have discussed rehab... it terrifies me.
I am so scared of my future!!! This is NOT what I expected for my life, my marriage or my family. I need help so badly...I WANT OUT and i pray this site will be a start for me.
I am a God believer and pray every day for Him to rescue me....sometimes i feel it, most times i just feel alone. When i came across this site I was overwelmed to see that I am not alone in this and I am reaching out to you for support, advise and friendship.
Thank you for listening...
I'll be back in a bit...
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