Change of Heart

[reddyrnot]

I posted the thread about binge drinking here this morning. In that statement i talked about giving up and moving back home. I'm from Mississippi. Last August I moved to Ohio to make a fresh start. Everything here was fine for a while. Of course there were problems but I handled them because I was sober. Hell, I almost totalled my truck in a snowstorm last Feb. but I was sober when it happened and everything worked out ok.
In March I took a drink one weekend. Nothing bad happenned. But of course my drinking escalated and by the start of july I was out of work.
I have been out of work for three weeks and have been drunk the entire time. It has caused financial trouble that I don't know that I can get out of .
This morning I was giving up and going home. I've been sober since last Thursday and have been in mental hell. But I've spent the entire day reading others' stories here and doing some powerful thinking.
I AM NOT giving up yet. I have been a coward the past three weeks. Tomorrow I am going to wake up and be a man. I have a long history with alcohol and I know a lot about recovery. I started using that knowledge again today. I will recover from this.
I may still end up back in Mississippi if I don't find a job. But I'm not giving up today.

[Mags]

Change of Heart

You're right. You will NOT give up. This may be a long and painful jorney for you - I'm not going to lie to you. But you can and will do it because I can tell it is time for you. It reallly doesn't have to be painful. Please, please, download RJ's book, take some of the supplements (at least start with the kudzu) and hopefully get the CD's.
You and I have talked before. Go on chat at night instead of drinking, just read here and feel like you don't have to drink.
You WILL do this, and we are here to help.

Take care..................

[PinkLady]

Change of Heart

You will make it! You have made the first step already. Think positive thoughts!

I do recommend the book, CD's and supplements. I was originally a skeptic, but they seem to make it so much easier!

[Newyear]

Change of Heart

Hi readyornot....sounds like you are ready...

If you have done this before then you know you can do it. Always good to figure out
why you went back to drinking - what the trigger was - so you can try to side step it the next time.
There is a lot of support here. I know the supps help a lot of people but the people here have helped me more than anything else.

I wish you the best.
Lisa

[karma7171]

Change of Heart

Never ever give up on yourself

I did that way too many times. It comes from within, but we all got it in us. I know in the past the big problem was that there seemed to be nothing within...but you know what...it was there all the time..right there...just waiting for me to tap into it.

It is still an adjustment at times...but know I know.

[Beaches]

Change of Heart

Reddy, you are strong and you have the motivation to make it. Keep that feeling and work with it. Stay here and keep talking to us. We will back you and encourage you.


Karma, what a great message. Never give up, ever! Hugs

[Bashley]

Change of Heart

Ready or Ready & Willing

Reddy or not.

Good on you for sticking with it. One day at a time and seek out the good people on this site. It's kinda like a huge A.A. without all the bruhha and you don't even have to get in your truck and drive anywhere, drunk or sober.
Alcohol has cost you enough amigo - time to stop paying the price, one day at a time and who knows, you might have a chance to regain some of what you have lost. It's never too late.
Bye the way. Which part of Mississipi do your folks live in? I used to have a small horse ranch in Vancleave, Hwy 59 North of Ocean Springs. Nice out there with all the hunting and fishing but a little strange for an Englishman trying to fit in! Those stories will have to come at a later date.
Good Luck
BFN
Bashley
:fingers:

[Doggygirl]

Change of Heart

Hi Reddy. I love your new attitude. Don't go down without a fight. We are all right here rooting for you. Best wishes with the job search. I'm sure you are dealing with a number of issues, but it sounds like getting some income happening again is a very high priority. So...good job search vibes headed your direction today!

DG
Day 21 AF

[hart]

Change of Heart

Reddy

You made a good decision. Why move to Miss. when u are where u r and broke. A job will give you some self-pride back. Doesn't matter what it is. It will provide structure and will also aid in your not drinking.

I am proud of you for your change of mind. You can always go back if things don't work out, but at least you tried.:l

[Arial]

Change of Heart

Hi Reddy,

Good for you! - I hear a lot of determination and strength in your post so keep that and move forward! Best of luck with the job search - have been there and know how hard it is, but things DO work out though it's hard to see how sometimes. Being sober is such a good first step to the changes you want in your life, so keep strong, keep with us and keep your eye on your goal - you WILL get there one way or another!

Warmest wishes, and take care :l

[Mags]

Change of Heart

Bashley

Did someone mention Ocean Springs? I spent many summers there! I know every inch of that coast from a little sailboat. Ocean Springs
Bridge into Biloxi and then Gulfport. I know every sandbar in the gulf there. Or at least I did until Katrina. Don't get me started - my memories are so strong.

Reddyrnot - you and I have already talked via PM's etc. You know I am here for you. This can be good and this can happen.
Takes work on your part and on ours. I'll try to help.

[Niblet]

Change of Heart

Reddy, Kick some butt and hop back on this wagon of ours. We always have room !!! Congratulations on making up your mind to go forward !!!!