Newbies in Need - Day 8

[Janice]

Good morning everyone and welcome to day 8 on the newbies thread. For any newcomers lurking about , this is a daily thread for support and encouragement to anyone who needs it no matter what your goal is - moderation, absintence, 30 days, we are here for each other!

Well the first thing we've got to do today is congratulate Mary on her first 30 days AF!!!!!
Mary, what a journey this has been for you!! I remember you right back at the end of April/May when I first joined - you never gave up, good days followed by slip followed by more good days followed by more slips - but you never gave up! Your posts are always inspiring to others and I have so much admiration for you Mary.

Gardengirl you are right about changing the way you think. You have got to have a positive attitude to this otherwise its a much harder battle to fight. Yesterday was a warning sign for me - felt down so could easily have had a drink. To everyone else - Cindi and Cheeks (hope day 2 went ok), Paula, Star, NPGBBI, Joesgal, Doggygirl, Benjamin, Louise, and Bird (where were you yesterday, we missed you) and anyone else I might have missed (the list is getting long!!) and all newcomers, have a great day.

Janicexxxx

[garden girl]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Morning all,Congratulations Mary, 30 days fantastic. Janice glad to see you feeling brighter, I feel fine, its a beautiful day here, the girls and myself were going to go to town to shop but we may just stay here and enjoy the sunshine. This is just a quick visit, so have a great day everyone, old and new, catch up later GG XXXX

[Guest]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Hi Janice and garden girl and all to come.

Mary, you must feel 10 feet tall this morning, and rightly so.
I couldn`t be any more proud of you than I am this day........to achieve that first 30 days really does give you the firm foundations of freedom from alcohol for the rest of your life. I have enormous admiration for you Mary, because you showed true guts and admitted from the outset that you couldn`t moderate, whereas I attempted mods, knowing full well that I couldn`t moderate either. Your initial despair has been echoed by myself, but once I saw that you were off and running, it gave me the much-needed impetus to follow you. We should make you the Newbies Idol..........you`ve earned it!!!

Janice, am so glad you didn`t succumb last night.........I knew you wouldn`t........you`re stronger than you think.........proud of you........Well done!!!

Gg, glad you`re feeling better..........I just know this will all come right for you........you know your goal, and you`re going to achieve it.........we`re all right by your side!!!

By the way..........anyone remember Bo Derek??..............just wanted to say that I`m a "10" LOL...............Day 10 AF for me..............feeling on top of the world!!!

Have a splendid day everyone, basking in Mary`s success........3 cheers for Mary........HIP HIP HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!

All my love,

Starlight Impress x

[paula]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Good morning everyone, I'm babysitting today, the weathers good, so it looks like a trip to the park. Well done Mary, glad your feeling better Janice and GG. Yes Star, I remember Bo Derek, well done on 10 days. 9 days for me and feeling healthy.
Have a perfect day. Love Paula xx

[joesgal]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Good morning Janice, Starlight, Paula, Garden Girl and everyone else. Well it is now day 12 for me and I couldn't have done it had I not found this site, so, I am very grateful to everyone who posts and shares their experiences. Thank you all so much for helping me on my journey. I know that there are probably trials ahead for me but I truly believe that I will make it this time. I have decided to continue to abstain when my 30 days are up. I have tried to moderate in the past but I was kidding myself that I could do it and somehow continuing to abstain seems to be easier to contemplate. Anyways I wish you all a good day, Joesgal xx

[Guest]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Way to go joesgal........."I truly believe that I will make it this time".........me too, because it all comes down to believing in ourselves.

Like yourself, my intention is NEVER to drink again!!!...........it`s just not worth all the heartache.

Starlight Impress x

[retteacher]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Thank you so much everyone. I'm just starting day 30, but I know what I have to do to stay sober. We have a cocktail party later before seeing a play, but I have a plan, & I'll stick to it. Thank you so, so much. You're all right behind me in terms of building up the days.

I just read an article on addiction. There's a reason why rehab is usually 90 days. It takes that long for our brain to learn impulse control & good decision-making again. It takes 90 days for the brain to reset those 2 functions which got screwed up w/all the drinking. I think I'll feel more confidence in myself when I achieve the 90 day mark. In the meantime, I'll be vigilant. Please, everyone, don't give up. I feel so much better now. My worst day sober is so much better than any day drunk or drinking. I love you all & wouldn't be here right now wo/you, Mary

[Benjammin]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Morning all! Very busy day at work yesterday, then home with only two hours left until bedtime! Glad to hear everyone is feeling chipper this morning. Glad you made it through the desire phase last night Janice! Only hours left to go until 30 Mary, Congrats! Thanks for the tip on the 90 Days, that sounds like it makes sense. One question though. I've turned to teas as my drink of choice when I feel like I want "something", do you have to quit caffeine too to make that effective or are we dealing with one substance at a time?

Just a thought for today. While speaking with some of my friends yesterday about the chain of events and my decision to be AF for the foreseeable future we began to discuss the nature of want. At first I was starting statements with the idea that I wanted to be able to drink and felt strange that I wasn't going to. Then we started to go deeper into what the desire really was. I don't really want to drink, what I want is to feel relaxed, happy, alive, surrounded by friends and have the opportunity to joke, laugh, tell stories, and move outside of the everyday work pace for a while. Perhaps the first drink helps to facilitate that but it certainly isn't required for those emotions or that situation to be a reality. In fact, much beyond the first couple of drinks alcohol subtracts from the capacity to archive those wants. Relaxed becomes sloppy. Happy becomes boisterous and pushy. Alive becomes clouded confused or blacked out. Why am I afraid to stop something that in reality keeps me from getting what I want out of life? If you get a chance take a moment today to move beyond the idea of "I want a drink" and write down your true desires. Then take a look at those and figure out if having a drink today will help you to achieve them.

Smile!!

[SusieQ]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Newbie

:new: Hi - I'm just getting started and am on day 3 of this journey. Feeling positive today, the sun is shinning and hopeful that I can make it through this day. I would love to be a part of your group - just didn't know if one could simply jump in or what. Let me know if this is acceptable.

Susie Q

[Benjammin]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

SusieQ;175993 wrote: :new: Hi - I'm just getting started and am on day 3 of this journey. Feeling positive today, the sun is shinning and hopeful that I can make it through this day. I would love to be a part of your group - just didn't know if one could simply jump in or what. Let me know if this is acceptable.

Susie Q

Jump on in!! No strict rules or guidelines. Just folks trying to find a better way with a little support from others that know what it's like to be there. Congrats on Day 3!

:welcome:

[louise]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Welcome Susie! Great thought about why we want to take that 1st drink Benjammin. Mary, thanks for the tidbit on 90 days and :goodjob: on the 30. Stars for Star, Paula, and Joe'sgal on 10, 9 and 13. Thanks for starting us out Janice and glad you are feeling better. GG have fun with the girls and make a plan for later in the day with reading the books you were going to get, listening to the cd's, taking the supps and staying busy - being on here all evening if needed. We really do want to see you saying you are starting day 4. Hi to all to come, hope your day is good. I'm off to dr. for routine blood work (annual check up) and feeling good they will find no alcohol in my system!

[paula]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Hi Susie and welcome.
You will get all the help and support you need. Keep reading and posting.
Love Paula.

[retteacher]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Dear Ben: You've brought up some interesting points about why we began drinking in the first place. Yes, it was to feel social & happy. The alcohol helps to release those happiness chemicals in the brain. The trouble w/me (addictive personality) is that I wanted to keep those chemicals coming by drinking more & more. Eventually, it takes more alcohol to get even a little buzz, & the crash is just not worth it. The trouble was that the habit of drinking for the buzz became ingrained even though it was making me miserable. I hope what I'm saying makes sense. I have done a number of social gatherings AF, & I must admit it's different. There's a much slower gathering of conviviality & sociability. There's no drink to get me right into it. I'm much more my thoughtful, introspective self. I do have a sense of humor, however, & that has come out as well. The knowledge of what I did & said the next morning is well worth a few shy, awkward moments.

As far as caffeine, I drink a solid mugful in the AM & that's it. I'm a sensible eater, but I haven't given up ice cream, carbs, etc. I almost feel I need a little extra now that I've taken out the alcohol (which metabolizes as sugar). When I feel a craving (which is getting less & less frequent), I often have some pretzels or a spoonful of ice cream. That seems to help.

Hope this is helpful.

Mary

PS: I'm so grateful that I'm AF for so long that I want to keep thanking all of you & telling you how much I love you all.

[PinkLady]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Hello everyone! Happy Wednesday!

Mary - Congratulations on Day 30!! What is your plan now? You should be so proud of yourself!

Starlight - Awesome! Double-digits! I made it too! Even being in Napa (Wine Country) last night for the first day of vacation --- and I didn't break! Who 'da thought I could be this strong!!!

Paula - You are doing fantastic! Day 9!! --- One more day to Bo Derek!!! LMAO!

Joesgal - You snuck up on me with the 12 days! Great job!

Benjammin - You are right on! It really helped seeing it all in writing. I will have to remember that when I am trying to feel relaxed, alive and happy. Thanks!

Make it a good day everyone. Stay strong and confident!!!

Love Ya!

[garden girl]

Newbies in Need - Day 8

Hello everyone, the thread seems very quiet today, Janice hope your ok. Welcome suzieQ, I feel fine up to now, not counting days just keeping busy and reajusting my way of thinking. I will catch up tomorrow have a good evening. GG