Yesterday, I was trying to remember when I crossed the lines from social drinking, to heavy drinking, to alcoholic drinking. I used drink to ease my fears, then it turned on me & caused my fears. I still have my insecurities now that I'm AF, but I work through them instead of blotting them out. In my alcoholic drinking years, I developed a phobia of driving on the highway. I'm now relearning to do that. It's amazing how isolated I became over the years wo/even knowing it. Maybe that's because I was still pretty functional. At any rate, I'm so grateful to MWO for helping me out of the hole I was in. Mary
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Newbies in need - Day 21
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Hi Everyone: Janice, where are you? I hope you're OK.
Yesterday, I was trying to remember when I crossed the lines from social drinking, to heavy drinking, to alcoholic drinking. I used drink to ease my fears, then it turned on me & caused my fears. I still have my insecurities now that I'm AF, but I work through them instead of blotting them out. In my alcoholic drinking years, I developed a phobia of driving on the highway. I'm now relearning to do that. It's amazing how isolated I became over the years wo/even knowing it. Maybe that's because I was still pretty functional. At any rate, I'm so grateful to MWO for helping me out of the hole I was in. MaryWisdom, Courage, Strength
October 3, 2012Tags: None
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Good morning Mary and all to come.
I am very hopeful today. I started on something besides the topa (titrated off slowly) and doctor has given me Campral/Naltrexone and Lexapro (for anxiety).
This seems like such a huge cocktail of drugs BUT if they help me overcome those 2 and 3 day AF humps so I can go for a long string, it will be worth it. Others on this site have used Campral and Naltroxene with success, so yes, I am hopeful.
Anyway, enough about me, Mary, you are doing so well and I really like how you share your thoughts of what being sober does in such a positive light. One of our biggest problems is that "quitting" can be a negative, but your thoughts are making "quitting" less negative and more of a positive "rebirth" experience. Thank you!!
To all others, please have a wonderful day.
CindiAF April 9, 2016
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Well done - keep up the good work Mary.
I certainly know where you're coming from - where did we cross that invisible boundary? I am managing a few af days but am seriously moderating and do feel a heck of a lot better. Like with everyone here, one step at a time, and hopefully one day I will be able to look back and wonder why I ever did it - a bit like when I look back at my ex fiancee and wonder why I was ever with him for 8 years. I called it a day when I was going nowhere and not happy then, so why can't I do it with a bottle of wine??
Sorry I'm not posting much at the moment - I'm on holiday with the kids for the next couple of weeks and am on the pc intermittently.
I hope you're all keeping well and look forward to keeping up with you in the next day or two.
Take care
Sweet
xx
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Good day to you Mary,and well done for making such fantastic progress.I read your post with interest,not just because of all the A/F days you are accumalating, but also the way you search your inner self and discover the whys and hows of this progressive addiction that takes so much away!Then one day you stop and wonder Who Am i ?.It certainly rings true to me,and i think you will continue to grow,and encourage others to in the process -you say it so well and are an inspiration.Keep up the good work.xx
Cindi Hi to you also,Seems like you are doing everything you can,(whatever it takes)I Really hope it helps.Look forward to hearing how it goes xx
Hello to all that follow.Wishing you luck whatever your plans.Have a great Tues xx
I was also wondreing if Janice was ok-Hope you are xx
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Ah sweet! Just wanted to say a personal Hi to you also,i think you kindly replied to a post i had made about Supps so thanks.
Like you i don't get much time on the computer either.What with School Hols and the children constantly on here,not to mention work and all the other things.Its great when i can though.Great to hear you are moderating well,i have been experimenting .A/F at the mo.xx
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Good afternoon
Hi Everyone,
It is very encouraging to read posts by you guys, Mary you are a vision of my AF future, it is incredibly helpfull to hear about the changes you are going through after a long AF period. Things I have to look forward to.. keep them comming.
Day 9 of 10 for me, I " almost " caved in yesterday. I got home and realized that I needed a few ingredients for a recipe I was going to make, which ment that I had to go out and get them, by myself, ie: without the wife and kid in the car. My plan was to go to the grocery store and " swing" by the Beer store to pick up a 6 pack.. just a 6 pack and not a 24.. My intentions were to only have 3 beers..no more than that.
So, all the way to the grocery store I am battling in my head.. should I , no, yes, no, yes.. etc.. on and on..
Got my ingredients... was comming up on the intersection.. do I turn and go home, or go straight and stop at the beer store.. quick, only 200 feet...100...50..
Split decision, Turn and GO HOME..
No beer,
AF
I am very happy that I made that decision and not the other one. That was a close call.
Thanks again everyone for your support and wise words.. Have a great AF day
RikerDo or Do Not, There is No Try - Yoda
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Good morning, everyone.
The heat is back in Texas and it's really too hot to get out and work in the garden. The bugs have taken over. I'm about ready to tear out the tomatoes and plant a fall crop.
The current "crisis" with the step daughter has passed and that part of life is back to normal so I'm just very busy working right now so that keeps me on an even keel.
Mary, I'm so happy you are doing so well and thanks for starting the thread this morning.
Cindi, keep us posted on how you are doing on the new drug cocktail. I've been considering getting off of the Topa myself.
Sweet, your brain is wired differently with alcohol than it is with other things like relationships. I've always wondered why I can say no to a piece of cake because of the calories but can't say no to the alcohol for the same reason. It's all wiring and chemistry. I don't understand it, I just know that it works that way.
Hi WakeUp have a great day.
Janice and Garden Girl and Kitty, hope to hear from you soon.
MelissaIf I ruin my body where will I live? :ranger
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Hi Again: I just love starting or coming into this Newbie in Need thread early & then looking at it later in the day. For those of you who are somewhere between days 1 through 10, those are the hardest. It gets easier after that (not that I'm casual about my sobriety...I'm always on guard). Riker, I've done what you did last night. At the last minute, I've made the right decision. What would 3 - 6 beers have done for you? Nothing positive. For me, that would have started me on a binge.
I mentioned my driving phobia in my opening thread. It developed in my last 3 years of drinking. I think my self confidence & sense of judgement was just shot w/the daily onslaught of drinking & hangovers. It got to the point where I couldn't go even a few miles on the interstate wo/getting panicky. I recently drove up to Vermont & down to Connecticut on the interstate w/a little nervousness but generally fine. That worked wonders for my confidence. I faced my fear & went through it & came out stronger on the other side of it.
I love you all, MaryWisdom, Courage, Strength
October 3, 2012
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Newbies in need - Day 21
Mary,
You have faced one big fear, giving up your "crutch" and now are ready to face more head on.
I have a feeling there is no stopping you now!!
If you ever want to take a real drive, you can come down to Alabama and see me. (Weekends, of course, not home during the week.)
We'll give you a big southern welcome and a throw down!! Sans alcohol!!! (Lots of iced tea, though.)
I so love to hear how well you are doing. Your posts help make my day.
CindiAF April 9, 2016
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Newbies in need - Day 21
And you are responsible for ours Mary. It's beautiful people like yourself who makes this place work the way it does.
Glad you took the high road as I did. You simply have gotten way to far to allow a momentary lapse of reason.
Cheers to you all,
RikerDo or Do Not, There is No Try - Yoda
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