starting again...again

[aliame]

I have started so many times, posted each time I start, then get no-where.
This weekend am going to try again.
I am scared have liver disease, do not want to know, and part of me feels if I am going to die anyway, why put myself through struggle of giving up?
Couple of AF days last week, one this week, next week...who knows?

[betty boop]

starting again...again

Hi Pipsqueak, nice to see you back.

Make THIS the time that you actually do it.

There is an excellent thread about attitude on general discussion.

Love & Hugs, BB xx

[retteacher]

starting again...again

Hi Pip: I can't tell you how many times I started & stopped. Years & years of it. Right now, I'm 46 days AF & have never felt better. I always thought I'd have some sort of bottoming out & then stop. What actually happened was that on July 10th I woke up & said "enough is enough." Nothing awful happened the day before. I just decided I would stop for that one day. Then the next day, I told myself that I'd stop for that one day etc. I didn't count any days for 10 full AF days. The first 3 - 7 days were the worst, craving after craving. I just came here to MWO constantly. I still have the occasional thought but nothing like the first 10 days. Keep coming. Mary

[Chief]

starting again...again

Hi Pipsqueak and glad to see you checked in. Take a look at the Attitude thread Betty just mentioned and then re-read your post above.. any key words there? You CAN do this if you want. We can help you Beat the Beast! Good luck and keep coming back...Don

[look]

starting again...again

Hi pipsqueak: listen to don,good luck

[beatle]

starting again...again

Good to see you trying again. You cannot imagine how many times I tried and failed (I can't even imagine!).

One thing, about the liver disease, or any damage you might have done, my doctor told me that even if you just sqeeze in a few AF days here and there, even one, every time you do it, you give your liver a break and it has health benefits. So just keep trying, more AF days, longer periods... don't give up.

I know it's repetitive, but I have to say from experience that it is much easier to get and stay AF if you take lots of supps, eat well, and exercise.

[Guest]

starting again...again

Hi pipsqueak,
I had loads of false starts also, as have loads of other people, so you`re certainly not alone in that.
You just have to keep trying, then all of a sudden, you`ll find yourself so very determined that you`ll not only start, but keep going. Let`s see you do it this time........

Love and strength to you,

Starlight Impress x

[Suzanna]

starting again...again

me too

Hi Pipsqueak! Like Beatle and Starlight and Don, I have had lots of false starts, but now am racking up AF days, 3 to 4 in a row, and it has been a long time since I was able to do that. Alot of people say that 3rd to 4th day is hard, but with the sups it can be gotten through, and I'll let you know when I do that. Stay here through it all, there is no judging, read lots! I find alot of posts really click with me. :h love your name! Suz

[aliame]

starting again...again

Have read posts on attitude thread. It really does help to now others have been where I am, and have now moved forward. Can I ask a question? When I get a craving it doesn't seem to go away, I have heard they only last about 15 minutes, but is that just the physical? If the thought comes into my head that today is the day for a drink, I still feel that when I go to bed at night. I have tried hypno, and affirmations, asking my husband to hide my drink, pouring drink away, But my mind always seems to have decided. I am not giving up responsibility, I know I am my mind, but HOW do you sit it out? When I was pregnant, I did not touch a drop, and had no cravings whatsoever. Sometimes I sort of wistfully looked at beer gardens or cheap booze in shop, but it just wasnot an option, so was easy. I wish I could get that mind set back.

[retteacher]

starting again...again

I do something else. Force my mind away from the drinking thoughts. I also eat something...especially a carb. I also have a cup of coffee if it's still AM when I get the thought. Hope this helps. Mary

[memarcie]

starting again...again

Go for a walk or find something to do around your house, clean a room really good or something like that. Just keep yourself occupied.

[Chief]

starting again...again

Pipsqueak, Are you or have you stopped drinking using the MWO program? I find taking the kudzu and l-glut really help curb the cravings, especially the first week. I'm on Day 15 and it does get easier everyday. The Beast still puts the thought of drinking into my mind but the physical craving and the obsession with drinking is gone. Now it's just a matter of retraining my mind to accept the fact that I am a non-drinker and they say that just takes time. You cannot undo years of doing something in a few days.
For me, if I'm going to do something I have to put 110% into it so I followed the MWO program by the book. I did everything except taking the drugs (topa,etc), which is your choice as stated in the book. So maybe you just haven't yet been able to make that committment to go all out to kick this thing. You are not alone. I , like so many have tried and failed but this time something just clicked. The people here were great in getting me motivated and I think I was just sick of trying and failing. I think we succeed when we get to the point of the pain of drinking is more than the pain of quitting.
So read the book and come up with a real plan. Just say " I will not drink today, period" and mean it and stick to it. You have to separate your thinking and desires from The Beast's. The Beast only wants one thing- Booze. You, on the other hand want sobriety. So it really comes down to who is in control of your actions. Hope this helps. We are all here for you, log on when it gets tough, someone will be here. You can do it if I can... Don

[Andy1111]

starting again...again

Try an AA meeting. It doesn't hurt to sit there and listen. Good luck.

[aliame]

starting again...again

Have read book cover to cover several times. Have abs cds and add ons. Also have other hypno cds bought previously. have all supplements. have made affirmation tape. Am member of gym, and go! Have book with recipes for reducing cravings and healthy diet. Have two great kids. Have written out starter plan, and highlighted follow up tactics. Don't know what is missing. The days when I don't drink, feel like never will again, the days when I do, can't imagine giving up. Have tried AA, was in total awe of the brave people there, but at moment unable to attend meetings, cos kids under school age, and husband works shifts. Anyway, did not feel was way I wanted to go, hence MWO.
I realise I sound negative, and really don't want to, but am not just thinking half heartedly about this, feel like have made real commitment, yet getting no-where.

[betty boop]

starting again...again

Pip,

Keep trying, one day it will 'click' well done so far.