paranoia

[juney]

i think im being paranoid but maybe not as ive been af for only one day but my youngest came up to me whilst i was doing some work on my lap top and asked if i was drunk and where i had hid the bottles! i couldnt stress enough that i was ok and just a bit worn out as i had been up early and doing the garden amongst other things. i feel so hopless and dont know what to do to prove that i have given up for now. why dont they believe me. what can i do to make it better xx

[Flip]

paranoia

Time will fix it Juney, it's probably so unusal for you to be sober that they can't quite believe it - give it a week or so and they will be so excited - you have to prove it to them!

[lushy]

paranoia

Like Flip said, give it time. Once they see you are not drinking they will believe you. Actions speak louder than words. Wishing you the best!

[beatle]

paranoia

wow, that must have been awful. My kids are too young to know (and now it's too late for them to ever know- ha!), except maybe they could sense something was not quite right. I guess if your kids are old enough to know, they are old enough for you to explain what you are doing, and how much it hurts to be accused when you are trying so hard?

I get this sometimes from my DH, who occassionally claims he smells alcohol on me when I haven't been drinking for days or weeks (although sometimes he has been right, too). When I have been sober and working hard at it, mind you, it hurts and my first reaction is, well if he thinks I'm drinking anyway, why not? But you got to keep in your head WHY you don't want to drink, don't let it get you down, because you will feel even worse if you give in.

[Guest]

paranoia

juney, I know this hurt, but just as you are healing, your family is too. As everyone else has said...TIME heals a proves all. They don't believe you and for good reason. How many bottles have been hidden? You have to take it one day at a time. They will in time see your success and trust you again. It does not happen on day 1. There will come a day when that same child hugs you and tells you how proud he/she is of you for changing. So keep it up. Don't feel beaten up, they ask because they love you!!!! If they didn't love you, they wouldn't care if you were drinking. Time will heal you all. Just give he/she and hug and say..."no drinking today"....

[Accountable for Me]

paranoia

juney, like all of the others have said; this takes time. I am going through the same with my 13 year old. She is still very angry and hurt from my drinking. She brings it up in every conversation we have. Even though it irritates the he** out of me I have to remain patient and comfort/explain to her that I had given it up many months ago. It is like this in many of my relationships actually. I am constantly on the defensive but I handle it better now. I should mention that my oldest is living with her father and his wife.... so her accusations/suspicions are pretty out there and it makes it harder to 'prove' my sobriety.

We can't change the past but we certainly can control what happens in our future.

The more our children interact with us and see a 'sober' mom/dad they will gain trust again.

I am thankful my youngest is 2 and has no idea the he** I have been through because of my addiction and hopefully never will.

Hang in there. Time will heal this.

[Niblet]

paranoia

Take a deep breath Hon and know that you are doing the right thing for yourself and your family... It must have been quite scarry for a young child to see mommy at times out of control and this child is just making sure that you are OK... Just reassure your child and be there to show support... It will be OK... Deep Breaths... See you are gonna be just find.... Brew yourself a nice cup of tea or maybe have some decaf. coffee... I wish you all the very best.

[betty boop]

paranoia

Ditto the others, I cant say it any better ........

Be strong, it is worth it I promise ............

[retteacher]

paranoia

Juney: Remember that you are stopping for yourself mainly. Mary

[look]

paranoia

I know the feeling.I've said sorry so many times, it doesn't mean any thing any more.Like everyone says time will heal.Now I just don't say anything(i don't argue )Things are pretty much back to normal?Don't forget who your doing this for.hang in there

[janka]

paranoia

Hi Junie .. ah! looking for and finding the bottles! had that happen to me several times, and oh so sad when they are found!!!! but today, you had no bottles to find! that's terrific in itself! hopeless ... why? there is so much hope and forgiveness ...your baby will come to trust and heal as you do ... your baby wants you to be safe most of all ... hug her/him(?) and say thanks for looking out for mommy, but I am okay ... play cards, go for ice cream, whatever. have faith and do not be impatient with time. take care, j