Newbies in Need - Day 7

[Janice]

Hi everyone, thought I'd surprise you and start the thread off today!! Well I'm quite pleased with my little self after yesterday. I did 1 whole day AF!! To be honest, I am more relieved with how much better I am feeling in myself - I thought I was going mad with such feelings of grief, despair, failure, low self esteem and loneliness.

The swimming first thing definitely got me in the right frame of mind to make yesterday work. I also understand that I was drinking because I was and am under a lot of stress ("I deserved it", you know the phrase) but I also understand that drinking does not help us cope with stress, it does not magically make our problems go away, it just makes us feel so much worse and then we cannot cope. Then we have another drink.... Its a vicious circle isn't it? That stress has not gone away today, the problems I had the other day are still there but what feels different today and yesterday is the way I'm thinking and coping with those stresses - drinking just made everything seem so desparate, no way out, what's the point etc etc.

Anyway I would just like to say a big thank you to everyone at MWO and this thread because even during those dark days when I couldn't post, I still kept reading and being inspired by you all. We have something very special here and certainly the "newbie" thread has come to my rescue many times since I joined at the end of April. Now, I keep trying to remind myself of how I felt in May when I was Af, and how much better I looked and coped with life. I want to get that back again. I would also like to say a big thank you to those lovely people who took the time to message me and come to my rescue, you know who you are, I am so grateful. With much love and admiration to everyone. Have a successful day whatever your goal is. Janicexxx

[Cinders]

Newbies in Need - Day 7

Janice,

What a wonderful way to start out the newbie thread today. Thank you.

The weekend looms and is usually my biggest challenge. I am going to take the one day at a time approach, not think about it as a weekend, and kick the booze beast back whenever she shows up.

Take care all to come and have a wonderful day.

Cindi

[Guest]

Newbies in Need - Day 7

Hi janice, cindi and all to come.

Janice, good for you in getting back on the AF path.......is enlightening to realize that alcohol cannot magically eradicate any of our problems....can only temporarily comfort us with its cold comfort until we sober up and find that our problems haven`t improved any by having a drink. Think AF does begin to seem a little more inviting once we really get a grip of this idea. You`re sounding very positive today........keep strong for your Day 2.

Cindi, initially the weekend looming posed something of a problem for me also........had the silly PARTY!!! PARTY!!! idea in my head, which I would attach to the weekend especially. Your thinking is the way forward.......it really is best to try to treat a Fri. and Sat. night just as if they were week nights. Am rooting for you.

Have been thinking about Mary`s recent post about how it supposedly takes 90 days to break a habit........think this is very much the case, as being on Day 40, I find that I still think about wine a lot. It`s like I know I won`t drink, yet remember how pleasant the wine tasted. 60 days must now be my next goal.......then on to the habit-breaking 90.

Have a splendid day all !!!

Much love,

Starlight Impress x

[uda]

Newbies in Need - Day 7

Hi Janice, Cindi and Starlight and all to come,

So glad you're feeling better Janice and you're 100% right about the problem/alcohol/problem+hangover/alcohol etc. One big change I'm noticing too is that problems are so much more manageable without alcohol. Probably because the brain is functionning trying to find real solutions rather than the next drink? And maybe also because alcohol makes you depressed and anxious, both of which tend to lead to inaction. I feel much less 'trapped' when I'm af.

Cindi, one day at a time is all it takes.

Starlight, you, like Mary, are an inspiration on this thread. You're showing us 'Learners' that it CAN be done.

Hope you all have a good weekend
Uli

[rustop61]

Newbies in Need - Day 7

Hi everyone. Hard to believe the first week is nearly over. The challenge of the week-end lies ahead but I am sure we will all get through it. Everyone seems to be doing so well and I really enjoy reading all the posts. Did not find yesterday as easy as some of the other days. Physically I was exhausted by evening after a long walk and a marathon cleaning spree. It wasnt a craving for alcohol per se just a feeling of being exhausted and of wanting to treat myself to some sort of comfort. Normally that was a large glass/bottle of wine. I took the last lot of supplements which I had missed some of the other days as it had gotten so late and when I had no cravings did not bother and made myself a cup of herbal bedtime tea. By the end of the mug it was quite soothing and I actually enjoyed it. I guess a lot of it is breaking habits and putting something else in their place. Have a lovely week-end, the weather is lovely here and I intend to do some gardening, walk the dogs and read my book.

Rustop

[retteacher]

Newbies in Need - Day 7

Hi Janet, Cindi, Star, & Rustop: I know the phrase, "I deserve it" all too well. Yes, the temporary easing of the stressful thoughts was great, but I've never been a person to stop at one. If one makes me feel better, then 10 will be what I really need. Now, as uncomfortable as it is, I've been trying to work through problems instead of putting them on hold w/alcohol. I've been going to more Alanon meetings lately, & that helps. I also try to come here to MWO no matter what! Have a great weekend. Mary