Feeling very hostile, Day 3

[Finding My Self]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Phoenix - you're doing just great! All good symptoms of progress!!! I reackon anyway! Got to justify the fact that I could have murdered in the first couple of weeks....you've reminded me....oops!!

If flippant (I think funny!) helps be flippant!!

My battery is going on my laptop - back later................!

Love FMF xx

[gottatry]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

hang in Phoenix, I'm right behind you on day 2

[Bluebell]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Phoenix! Yes! Somebody else who thinks they say silly things at inappropriate moments! I do that! I'm still here!

Re the red eye thing - I'm with you on that one too! My right eye would explode from time to time and look really awful. Especially after a big booze night. I knew in my heart of hearts what was causing it but still went to the Pharmacist to see if there was anything they could give me. I got Visine eye drops which help a bit. I was told I have a weak vein in that eye and that any pressure could set it off. I worked it out......cos I'm clever...... that it was probably when my blood pressure would shoot up, because of too much alcohol, that would be putting the pressure on it, not sneezing (as I told the pharmacist!). Now, isn't that something to be proud of? Anyway, give eye drops from the chemist a go, they might clear those red lines.

I am on day 2 AF so travelling almost alongside ya!

Take care.

[Phoenix74]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Hello everyone I'm on Day 4. Feels like Day 444,444,444...

Feels like Day 444,444,444, and not in a "woo hoo! I'm the business! I'm so long AF that I've expired happily!!" :angel:

Thanks everyone for posting me back x
I'm much the same today. Was reading the thread, "Drinking A Mental Release", that's so applicable to me. It's awful, cos those triggers are always there. Today, now this second, my husband is clattering and banging, the kitten is whining, my dog is pacing up and down the kitchen between my husband and me looking for an indication of movement to the car, and I WOULD REALLY LOVE A GLASS OF WINE. I'm just glued to the site instead.

Bluebell thanks I'll try the pharmacy but it's in both eyes so I can't hope it's a weak vein, maybe it's dry corneas or something! Hopefully. They're still the same. Not horror movie red but streaky just the same. How's Day 3 going for u?

Gottatry how u getting on too? It's your day 3 too isn't it - hope you're well.

FMF I wish the battery would go on my husband :H

Poor duck, my husband, he's naturally noisy, and when I get home from work I always need quiet time to debrief my mind, and I can't get that. What do I do? Find a way to get through it other than having glasses of wine I suppose. That's hard to do cos as someone said in the same thread I mentioned earlier, "we are creatures of mental and emotional habit" and I, we are in the habit of 'mentally escaping' and 'emotionally releasing' with alcohol. What to do with the bloody great problems now?
Anything but drink:huh:

[retteacher]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Phoenix: When I go AF, I become very irritable. I think it's because I have nothing shielding me from my emotions & any unfinished business that might be simmering inside. Mary

[wakupmom]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Hi phoenix,Congrates on your day 4!! Your home life seems like a real tester.Something out of a comedy scetch.Hope not to offend ,but i am laughing at the thought of it.Please stay sain so you can share the next saga!! xx
So true Mary,I think its flips quote that says it all.To heal it has to be felt,(not the exact off course) just short and to the point. xx

[Phoenix74]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

I'm living in a box in a wooden box

Hello all!

Well isn't the internet a wonder. I just wrote an epistle, only to hit the wrong key and have the whole lot disappear poof!

Wakupmom get a loada this one.
I'm in a box, 6 by 10, foot.
It's dusk, it's raining mad, blowing a gale, i'm sitting on the floor, on a roll of carpet underlay which, being a ROLL, keeps ROLLING forward. The laptop is on the christmas tree box in front of me.
Peat Moss to the left of me, Tetrosyl to the right, here i am stuck in the tool-shed with you :H

Background to this situation posted on Need Help ASAP last evening, but the general gist of it is: row with hubby over smoking in kitchen, the replying posts told me i couldn't reasonably expect to smoke indoors etc. So here I am.
Btw, i was much more upset (felt betrayed) about the comments he made about me & drinking when he got annoyed, than I was about the no smoking in house ultimatum. I fiercely resented having stuff thrown in my face so soon after he said he was proud of me for taking my situation in responsible hand and that he would support me 100%.

Day 5 and doing well, thanks everyone :l

[Guest]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Great stuff for being on Day 5, Pheonix.

Starlight Impress x

[bloggy]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Phoenix

Your post made me so mad for you I had to open a can of Pringles.

I had not read your post from last night until now but I would have thought he could have put up with a bit of secondhand smoke for a while in consideration of what you are going through with the AF thing.

I can only assume he is not addicted to any substance because if he was he would have an inkling of understanding.

I went 3 weeks AF in May- like (I suspect) most of us, I did not discuss my hourly/daily feelings with my BF, just went along as though it was the most natural thing in the world to drop a 20 year old alcohol addiction overnight.

After about 2 weeks I ventured to say I thought i was doing pretty well- he replied disdainfully that weeks of abstinance were nothing- it was only the years that counted!

Well, blow me down with a feather. And I had thought I was doing well.

I would just like to see how they would cope in the same boat. My BF has rotted all his teeth through excessive Coca Cola drinking, which he gives up for about a week on occasions.

But thats fine (?) because it isn't alcohol, and it isn't tobacco. I would not dream of mentioning it to him, ever. And if I saw he were trying to correct the problem the last thing i would do would be to tell him that only years counted, or criticize him for a secondary addiction!
I would tell him I thought he was doing great, because that would be the truth.

I think your husband needs some educating.

In the meantime, I hope you enjoy your shed, at least you're getting a bit of peace.

Love and hugs, and Huge Congrats on day 5!!! You are doing marvelously, don't worry about the smoking. You will sort that out in your own good time.

[Phoenix74]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Hey Marbella!

Thanks hon :schmokin:
My husband's a clean living, healthy, gym b4 work every mornin, one beer or glass of wine with dinner (NEVER a second) kinda guy.
He's a goodun though, if a little 'blinkered' at times and I think I'm a bit Peter O'Toole/Richard Harris for him, but he won't have any other, he has said. Except when we're going at it hammer and tongs ding ding :teeter:
Hope you're feelin good
B

[Cinders]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Phoenix,

I can't help it, I have been lmao reading your post.

Yes. We all responded that you shouldn't be expected to smoke in the house with you hubby. Most of us who did that live in the USA and we have been educated (read that brainwashed in the extreme) that it is a horrible, terrible, frightful thing to do. Most of us smokers are living in guilt and shame here in the states. We are the cause of all that is bad in the world. As a matter of fact, if you read the literature, if everyone quit smoking, no one would ever die!!!

Okay. So, I did not respond correctly to your post and now you are in a little wooden box rolling around on a carpet with the christmas tree box as your laptop table and the mulch to keep you company. The vision is just too funny. I am sorry. I shouldn't be laughing but it was a great, well written visual.

I do understand what you are saying about your husband's response to your drinking. I fully expect the same bs from my husband. He asked how I was doing this morning on my third day and I said "great, and slept well, too." Well, that set him off and he started lecturing me about how bad drinking is for me and how it messes up my sleep patterns, and hurts my organs, blah, blah. I looked at him in complete amazement and burst out laughing.

So, I apologize for not exactly responding to your post in the right way. and I am sorry you ended up in the little wooden box. I usually just step outside. (I keep an old fuzzy blanket by the door to wrap up in. I look funny, but stay warm while puffing away.)

And secondhand smoke really and truly is bad for others.

Cindi

[Cinders]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Oh, yes, and super congratulations on the AF days!! You are doing really well!!

Cindi

[wakupmom]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Hey phoenix!
Well done,Day 5 is great,am just behind you on day 4.Watch yourself on that carpet though please xx

[Phoenix74]

Feeling very hostile, Day 3

Hi Cindi !

Yeah it's the worst crime over here nowadays too - we're like social outcasts, which is the right way I suppose. The smoking in public places ban came in bout 4 yrs ago and home is the only place Just wish I could successfully quit.
Bloody hell:
1. problem smoker
2. problem drinker
3. problem chocolate eater
4. problem internet user
5. problem poster on a website :-)
I might as well just go and eat worms. In my garden tool-shed. It's mine all mine.

I'm in good form. I wasn't angry about the butt kicks I got from the posts (ok, mildly miffed for about 5 minutes cos i was congratulating myself for not drinking).

But it did make me realise that essentially, you were all right. Just cos I wasn't drinking didn't mean I could puff my way round the place with handy excuses, even if it was lashing rain and blowing a gale (is this working? any sympathy out there?);
suppose it amounts to taking advantage of him?

Oh well, I'm off to the cot now, I've been roaming around here on and off for 5 HRS!!!
I feel like the MWO stalker. Maybe I'll get better at getting thru the hrs between 5 and 9 as the AF days and hopefully weeks etc roll by...

Nightie night and thanks for coming to see me

xxx