AF Anyone??

[jewels]

AF Anyone??

Can I ask you guys a question? How come my picture isn't showing up? I put it in under edit profile but is is not showing up.

[prose]

AF Anyone??

Hello everyone,
I just typed a big long post and then pushed the "poof" button, it makes me SO MAD when that happens,
anyway had individual notes to all of you that ended up in some weird computer space and am out of time now,
basically just was saying hi,good job, thinking of you,
this is my big news, met some friends for a birthday supper and had soda and lime while they drank wine, you know it was a really powerful feeling,
anyway, sorry about the lame short message when you could have had a much better long one
best to everyone, will check in tomorrow am, P

[AMELIA]

AF Anyone??

Hey Prose, well done on the soda and lime. It is incredibly hard to do that when others are partaking. Good on you.

Jewels, maybe your pics file size is too big? I had to make mine tiny to get it to load up.
Plus it has to be a jpg I think??

Try again....looking forward to seeing it.

Hello everyone else....

[prose]

AF Anyone??

Good morning/afternoon/evening everyone,
How is everyone today? I have my first meeting with the therapist this afternoon, am looking forward to that...
found out this morning that i will be alone for most of the weekend so decided I had better make myself a really long list, what do you all have planned? P

[fjones]

AF Anyone??

I want to give it a shot. I have been drunk 4 nights this week and currently have an awful hangover. Its 7 hours since my last drink and the withdrawals are kicking in bad. I have been drinking for the last 4 years on and off but am finding that I am having less and less sober time. I want to talk again with people who have the same problem as me and manage to stop drinking. Thanks for being there.

[AMELIA]

AF Anyone??

Hey Prose, hope the therapist appt. goes well. It can be quite draining, but I usually felt much better for having gone.

Welcome Fjones,

I think we all have the same problem, in different degrees I guess, but we are all here because of our relationship with drinking. I have stopped totally a few times now. I was taking all the supps and topamax as well. The program works and you will get out of it what you put in I guess. You have to want to stop and you have to want to work out why you were drinking (what is your pay off - relaxation, numbing the mind, whatever,...) and find ways to solve those problems.
Glad you found the site. Keep us posted.

[cuckoosnest83]

AF Anyone??

hey prose, amelia, jewels, and welcome fjones. I just got in about 10 minutes ago from the gym and I'm headed up to take a shower and make some tea. Will be down later to post. Hope all is well with you.

[jewels]

AF Anyone??

Hi everybody! I hope everyone is doing well. My boyfriend left for his trip and I feel very alone. He doesn't really understand what I am going through and just tells me to think that drinking is not an option for me. He is right, but each day is such a struggle. I just want too feel comfortable with this. Each day is a battle even though I feel better and better each day. I have a list of things to do this weekend to keep busy. I really want to stick to it but I feel really weak.. I think my job has a lot to do with it. I am in mortgage sales and the market is extremely tough right now. Plus, I work with a bunch of young guys who like to party. I wonder if I worked somewhere that had more of a healthy atmosphere if I would be better off. Well, I just stopped home for my lunchbreak and I have to go back for a few more hours. I will check in later tonight. Welcome newcomers.....keep posting. We like to hear what you have to say. I hope my picture shows up this time. I used a different one.:helpme:

[cuckoosnest83]

AF Anyone??

Jewels, hang in there, girl. My boyfriend didn't understand either. Because it isn't an issue for them they think it isn't an issue for you. They have absolutely no understanding of the day to day struggle we go through not to have a drink. I think the stress of your job can add to the desire to drink but I don't think the young guys wanting to party has much to do with it. I think we make excuses to drink. Some might be more legitimate than others but they are still excuses. Well I should be here off and on most of the weekend. I'm cleaning house so to speak. So if you need to vent feel free.

[cuckoosnest83]

AF Anyone??

Well, all, I broke last night and had 2 gin and tonics and 2 glasses of wine. I know we can all rationalize our reasons for drinking but I think coming home to an empty house on Friday night with no plans was the big trigger. I had something to do almost every night this week except last night. So now I know that I need to have something to do every night even if it means going to a movie or out to dinner by myself. I don't feel hungover just let down. I plan on getting right back on the horse though. If I don't I'll feel doubly let down tomorrow. I hope you all had success and look forward to hearing from you.

Chris

[wonderworld]

AF Anyone??

Was that your first Friday night AF cuckoo? That's a really tough one. An empty house on a Friday night can really feel, well, not good. And good for you for getting right back on. If you linger in guilt or beat yourself up, well, it's pointless and unecessary. All your good work this week is still valid!

And, I'm curious.... did the drinks feel like you thought they would? The times I've fudged when trying to AF - well, the first one maybe had that nice little warm feeling for a little while and then after that I just felt kinda flat. It was not the fun I expected it (and SO wanted it) to be. Blah!! Just wondering if you experienced the same....... it's helpful to hear about that stuff....

Wonder xx

[cuckoosnest83]

AF Anyone??

WW, I was able to make it through last Friday night because a friend of mine and I were at a conference in Stowe, Vermont so it wasn't like being home in an empty house. Not to make excuses (but I probably am making excuses) on Thursdya night my ex came over to get a lot of his things from the garage and although I thought I handled it well on Thursday, I think the empty house on Friday accentuated the end of the relationship and being alone. Today I am going to contact our local humane association and see about volunteering on Friday nights. That way I'll have a commitment every Friday and I love animals so it should be something I enjoy.

As for the drinks and how they made me feel. To be honest, wonderworld, I didn't even want the first one, I think I was just fighting off the loneliness. Instead of drinking I should have called a friend or a family member but I have this persona where I don't want to be perceived as being weak or needy. I guess it healthier to need a person than it is to need alcohol. Anyway, WW. thanks for asking and I feel better today. A little bit stronger. I'm headed to the gym and then have lots of projects slated for completion today and tomorrow. Hopefully I'll keep myself busy.

Cuckoo

[wonderworld]

AF Anyone??

really good insights cuckoo. I can totally relate. I was craving yesterday afternoon big time, and your description confirmed my belief that it was more about feeling lonely (pathetic? left out? abandoned?) than anything else. Something about a Friday night really brings that out for me. Worse than the rest of the weekend or any other time. hmmmmm..... the volunteering sounds like a smart thing to do. There are lots of other options too - just need to plan. Good call!
Hope you have a great day-
luv WonderXX

[prose]

AF Anyone??

HI everyone,
well, here I am, screwed up last night but bound and determined to not beat myself up today, I was lying in bed thinking, ok, why did I do that, and I realized (duh!) that I was totally escaping having to deal with what the therapist talked about yesterday, I know that is not rocket science but a bit of a breakthrough for me, figuring out the triggers,
anyway, need to get going on my day, hope you all have time to check in this weekend, P

[evergreen]

AF Anyone??

Hey cuckoo, prose wonderworld and all,
I think sometimes we learn from our mistakes more than our successes. (Though NOT an excuse to learn more by tripping up on purpose. LOL. My drinking mind can rationalize anything.) At any rate I have gone thru about 6 months of falling down and picking myself up and somehow THIS time seems to have clicked. (I know I am only 10 days in but it feels different this time.) The important thing is to get right back on the horse and look for ways to avoid the fall again! I agree WW the last few times I have fallen, it somehow did not taste as good! This helps as I hold onto it as my last memory. We are remodeling our brains!!! Who said you can't teach an old dog new tricks!!!
Have a good weekend!!