busy mind

[Gumby]

right now I feel confident...tonites another story...I am going AF tonite and as the evening hours start to come and I think of no drink I become nervous. I am absolutely confident I will do this tonight...how long does the fear last?? I know I can do this evening but what scares me is the thought of saying good bye to my evening companion forever. Although in the beginning it was a great friend, or at least I thought, it is now a huge burden to my mind. I want the chatter in my brain to stop. I haven't been without a nightly drink in years, although I can cut back I always have a drink. So I am scared of this change not sure why. I guess my question is about how long do these strong mental games go on?? I fiqure we are all different but to have a general idea might be helpful...anyone?

[lilnev]

busy mind

Hi taa. I'm on day 7, and still run into the evening mind loop. "Can I have a drink now? How about now?" But the last couple of nights have not been as bad as the first 3 or 4. I think it helps me to have a plan for the evening. I'm going to go to a movie, I'm going to take a long walk to a park on the other side of town, I'm going to cook myself a quality dinner and watch the Red Sox lose again. Well OK, that wasn't exactly the plan, but you get the idea. Don't go into empty hours without an idea of how you're going to fill them.

peace and strength,
lilnev

[paula]

busy mind

Just take it hour by hour, if you are at home don't have any alcohol in the house to tempt you. Try not to look to far ahead. The chatter in your brain you have to try to ignore, take
your mind off it by doing something else. I find the first 2 days the worst, but after that I
feel so good that I have managed to stay af, it's liberating. You can do it.
Best of luck Paula.

[cowgal]

busy mind

hour by hour

Take it one hour at a time if you need to, I am only one day AF, today will be a little tough, but day 3 all the alcohol should be out of your system, so the physical craving may subside.............sorry to say for me the mental crap takes forever to go away, just stay busy, movie, walk, gym...........phone a friend or email on this site, Never done the chat, but see and hear alot of people do................

Good luck and I have faith you will handle it.................

Lots of love, hugs and support:h :l :l


Truly,

MA

[KAT20]

busy mind

taa813, Hi I have not been a member here long but have suffered with the mental games for at least a year now as I decided my evening and weekend drinking were getting out of control. I started seeing a therapist about a year ago and we worked on ways to calm down without alcohol. Well, that did'nt last long as there always seems to be something that will trigger me back to drinking. I too had that awful feeling of having to quit all together. For a lomg time my therapist kept telling me I was in precomptimplative stage and kept encouraging me. I then found MWO and this web site. I think the most important thing you are doing fo yourself is admitting you have a problem and not to be so hard on yourself. Everytime I tried and failed made me more determined to succed. There are so many inspiring and motivational threads here, as well as alot of info on meds and reading material. arm yourself with as much as you can. Naltrexone worked for me at first with mods, I actually would pour myself a glass of wine and would make an effort to slowly sip it so I did not feel so deprived. That worked for about a week and I was slipping again. so ya know what, I got up Monday morning and started all over again setting one goal at a time, AF during the week and mods on the weekend. It definetly is a retraining of the brain and some of the supplements and meds are very helpful. Keep reading and posting I find that helps as well. Best to you

[memarcie]

busy mind

taa813;210597 wrote: I know I can do this evening but what scares me is the thought of saying good bye to my evening companion forever.

Don't think of it as saying goodbye forever. Just tell yourself you aren't going to spend time with this companion tonight. One day at a time or one hour, or one minute. Whatever it takes.

Come on here and read, post, go into chat. Find new things to do read a book, watch a new show, take a bath, go for a walk.

[Guest]

busy mind

Hi taa,
The more AF nights you get under your belt, the less the fear becomes........hold onto that.
I was terrified and even resentful my 1st night, but can honestly say that now, if anything, I may occasionally think about a drink(old habits die hard-it`s how I used to live my life), but I would never ever go get a drink........am too aware of just how far I`ve come.

The thought of living without the booze would bring me out in a cold sweat, but you can get used to living without it, by simply not drinking for a day at a time. Through time you will become stronger........I no longer need to use the day at a time attitude........am happy being AF.

Starlight Impress x

[rustop61]

busy mind

Hi Taa

I felt the same when I came to this programme last year. The thought of never having another drink terrified me. I did 5 weeks AF to begin with and then tried moderation. However, that did not work and I was soon back to my old ways. Somebody said that moderation is AF with the odd drink thrown so that would be my ideal. I am taking it in stages. Did all of September AF and began October the same. Major stress with inlaws and of course I reached for the comfort of a drink. However, instead of staying away from these boards like last year, I came back and began again. I am taking it ODAT (One day at a time) and aiming for another 30 Days AF, small steps but all in the right direction.

Rustop

[The Londoner]

busy mind

Good Morning taa ,wishing you loads of luck for today and the days ahead.

I have read the other posts, a lot of good things have been said already.

From my own experience (I am nearing 60 days aF) I ate a lot when I started out and I ate healthy. Wouldn't recommend my diet but it worked for me. It was an extreme detox and I felt so lousy for the first 2 weeks or so, drink was the least thing on my mind! Weird, as I had been a regular drinker for nigh on 35 years. So, distract yourself with food, whatever takes your fancy, don't deprive yourself. Look out for food that will balance your blood sugars which are very up and down with alcohol intake. Personally, I kept away from all food/ meals that I associated with drinking (wine, in my case).

I am also a firm believer in vits B and C complex (I take solgar brand), milk thistle and SPIRULINA which is a nutritional green superfood supplement for (I quote) maintaining health, energy and optimimum weight. It's got protein, iron and B12, (useful for vegetarians). I get it from a shop called Revital here in the UK and found it a great support in the early days, made me feel nourished. Your body needs all the support you can give it at this time, so look after it well!

The other thing I used to do is to go to bed early. You don't have to sleep, just keep warm and read (for example!) I never drank wine in bed!

When you go out, have you any non drinking friends to have fun with? I went to stay recently with a lifelong friend who does not drink during the week. We reminisced and laughed all evening and my friend commented how much fun it was without the need for booze. We knew each other when we are at school together, no booze then either!

I am going to take up knitting this winter- not easy to hold a glass as well! Therapeutic too.
God help all those on my christmas gift list though!

Anyway! all the very best, I know you know we are all here to help you on your way!
I know too that you can do this!

love from Anna:h