It's great to be back.
After 8 months AF, I really fell from the wagon.
One thing that really amazed me was that in spite of how well life was going when I was sober once I took that first drink things deteriorated so quickly.
Within weeks my behaviour was completely out of control.
1. All my standards dropped - house untidy/grubby - no food in fridge - huge laundry pile
2. Fell over in the street drunk and broke my glasses
3. Passed out in the loo at a party and my husband went home without me after looking for me for an hour.
4. Have been indiscreet, unkind and dishonest to people I care about
5. Got in cars with other drunk people driving
and many many more......
And yet almost every morning I woke up thinking - I can't go on like this, this has got to stop and yet I did nothing.
Why did I have to reach a point where I was ashamed and afraid of myself before coming back here??
Big question for me?
Changeling
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