FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

[Suki411]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

East, I need help too. Got the almost last bit of paperwork done settling my dad's trust (don't know what the hell I'm doing and with no help from my family) and getting ready to settle my mom's estate (also don't know what the hell I'm doing there either). Trying to sneak it in at work, hard to do, getting sideways glances from the people I work with who go out for 10 smoke breaks a day, 2 hour lunches , while I eat lunch at my computer. Had 1 1/2 bottles of wine tonight, it might as well been 1 11/2!!! Love it! Had hockey tickets for tonight's game, but had NO interest in going and no one to go with.

The real estate agent who is suing me, called me 3 times today. Didn't answer. Has sent me all sorts of letters, which I've sent to my lawyer (someone I wanted to date years ago, is now single again, but dating some probably half his age).

I was reading a book on the bus to work today, "The Portable Therapist". Talked about a lot of things that are concerning me at the moment, but also talked about kids, and when you lose control over them. pretty interesting read, like reading short stories on certain issues.

I don't get the "look" from my sister, like you got from your daughter, only because my sister lives 3 hours away, but I get the "voice of disapproval".

Thing is, one thing the author said is that you need to put yourself first, to regain self-esteem, and it's not being selfish.

Have to feed the cats and the strays, take some sups, go to bed and listen to some cds.

ok, babbling again. Will check in tomorrow with you East.

[Gator]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

I just found this site today. I feel bad for posting in this arena, because you all have been here for a long time. But after reading a couple hundred posts, not nearly enough, I felt akin to most of you. I was reading some of this at work and it depressed me because I don't know that I can stop like that. This is a relatively new thing for me. I used to be able to go months without thinking about it, but now, wow, I can't remember the last day I was AF. I have constant blackouts, even when I haven't had that much (IMO). Like Saturday, my Christmas party, luckily I wasn't that guy that broke the bathroom mirror at my bosses bosses house, but I don't remember (wouldn't have been surprised). All of my friends are drinkers, so that leaves me by myself, which isn't any better. I'm on antidepressants, so It is even doubly bad. I didn't quit tonight and don't know how I'm going to, but I realize and have great ideas about quitting and life goas when I'm drinking, only to forget and hungover the following day. Anyway, I'll keep reading, there's a lot to read. Good luck to all and I hope to join you.

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

:welcome: Gator you have come to the right place for loads of support and hopefully find that with our help you can cut down on your drinking. Most of us on this thread have been having a bad time over the Xmas period but we are sticking together - we will get through it and hopefully try for some good AF time once the party season has passed. Lots of people are managing to have quite a good bit of AF time at the moment but sadly I am not one of them. I now know that I needed to have a longer AF period before I tried to moderate so I am setting my mind to being as good as I can then really going for a good AF month in January - that way I am not setting myself an unrealistic goal. Apart from Monday I have been fairly good at moderating so I am not going to beat myself up anymore

Wakeupmum thank you so much for your kind words of support. Hope you have a lovely Christmas and look forward to hearing from you when you get back

THANK YOU ALSO to everyone who gave me such words of encouragement yesterday :h xx

Suki I am so looking forward to the time for you that you manage to settle your Dads trust, your mums estate, kick the real estate agent into touch and move on. It must be such a drain on you the whole time having to worry and get no support from family - Other than your MWO family and your beautiful cats xx. Know what you mean about the voice on the other end of the phone and also what East said about THE LOOK. The trouble is that it makes me worse because I want another drink because I feel I have let folk down again - how stupid is that!!!


We all seem to be giving the wine bottles a hammering I think we need to set up a posse and kick :alf: out of town He is causing way, way too much trouble

Eastender sorry I was not around when you needed me yesterday. How are you feeling now? Don't beat yourself up - We will all get through this. Hope THE LOOK didn't upset you too much - I know the feeling well though!!! Fractions were never my strong point either!! I think we should all focus on what you said yesterday to teardrop about all the Af days we have had. Very good point and something to remember when we slip a little. I have great Faith in my ability to have a good AF session after Christmas and that is what is keeping me in a more positive frame of mind today and I am now sending all those positive vibes to everyone. Have heart keep focused we can do it xx

Teardrop I am with you on who can and can't get the mop out!! You keep those trousers on. Have you made up yet? Very well done on the 2 days AF as East said we must make every Af day count to keep us in a positive frame of mind. Well Done.

Well everyone take care keep strong and focused and keep posting. We are all there for one another

Sweetpea :hug: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[happydog]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hiya Everyone,
Hi Gator: Dont feel bad we welcome you with open arms. Like you i used to go months without thinking about it. But you are at the right place you will get lots of caring support.
Sweetpea : hope you are feeling a lot better in yourself.
Eastender : if there is any time you need help and no ones here! remember you can open up a thread there will always be someone there for you. cant get on the pc in the evenings, most times because my hubby hogs the pc all the time.
Suki: Try and stay strong you have been through so much. That auther is right need to put yourself first.

Had a drink last night as well. Yesterday i pm a friend and said i would not drink tonight b'cause i nearly passout twice had to hold myself together. I think the drink seems to effect me more b'cause where i have lost weight cant seem to handle the amount i used to drink. I will try and be strong tonight and say no to myself.
Going xmas shopping soon. i have booked to go to the threatre on friday just me and the kids to see christmas panto. we always go without fail every year.

Everyone please look after yourself and take extra care.
Love
Teardrop.x

[happydog]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi sweetpea,
miss your post glad to see you are in a good frame of mind.
Yes we have made up.( thank you)
Love
Teardrop.x

[Suki411]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Morning all. Woke up feeling a bit more positive, thanks for all the good thoughts.

Sweetpea, glad to read your post and see that you are feeling more positive. :yougo: Glad you are not going to beat yourself up anymore. You are just such an inspiration to us all.

You are right, this season has been a real test for a lot of us, whether holidays or other stress. The month is almost over, even though I'm not proud that I didn't stick to my plan (which I need to rethink, because I didn't really have a solid, well thought out one). I did have a total of 15 days AF. Which I AM PROUD of. I think I went into this without much thought, only that I needed help. I plan to use this time as training camp for the real season that begins in January. So glad I am on this team.

Think I'll spell wine as whine. Might make it easier to kick him out of town, Sheriff Sweet!

Yes Sweet, getting the voice of disapproval and the look just makes me want to have another. Need to work on that self-esteem, need to just remember what I have accomplished since my mom died 2 years ago. A lot. I am lucky to have surrounded mysrf with good people, my lawyer, my account and my MWO family. :thanks: Not going to let that lying, sleazy, money=grabbing real estate agent distract me my from my goal. I'll just picture him as :alf: and let the pros tackle him, so I can spend more time on me.

Gator: welcome, read, read, read and post. These are great people who know what you're going through. Lots of support here, lots to learn from all these lovely friends.

Teardrop, I'm with you, going to say no tonight too. You're right about how your body weight affects your reaction to AL. Jealous, how did you lose the weight?

East, look forward to hearing from you today. So what your daughter gave you "the look". You've been doing so well! I think I would find it hard to work at home, until I became AF, I would find it tempting. I think that's why my saturdays and sundays are the days that make me nervous about sticking to AF right now.
hope you have a great day.

Same to all of the other Firecrackers!

[Suki411]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Firecrackers, I have decided to change my avatar. The runner reminds me of being on the treadmill i've been on for years, especially for the last two+ years. Not a positive symbol of who I am and what I want to do.

Any suggestions?

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Suki Just a quick reply as I am just about to go out so haven't got the time to make an actual suggestion. But choose an avatar that will make you smile when you see it or something that will remind you about all the good things in your life - a fond memory - something happy

LOL Sweetpea xxxxx looking forward to seeing the new you :l :h

[Eastender]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi Firecrackers,
Feel like I lost my fuse today, do not think anything will fire me up!

Last night my daughter and BF put the Xmas tree up, With all the mess going on with the builders I did not feel up to dusting all the ornaments and various figures that now adorn the house.
They were drinking wine and feeling good when suddenly an argument erupted not noisy but they were not talking.
Mr East was trying to fix a new bracket on the wall for the television and it was not quite going as it should.
So it all got the better of me and I poured what I thought would be 1 glass.YEH RIGHT!
Six more later I got this sudden panic and got on line.Not clever because could not think straight. My daughter then came into office and saw me on MWO. Gave me that LOOK and like you say Sweetpea. YOU FEEL LIKE GETTING PLASTERED!!!!!
I did not but it took a lot of willpower. sent myself to bed.
Mr East just said this morning, You went to town last night did'nt you? I mumbled I felt stressed with all that was going on, Did not get any sympathy because the way he looks at it ,is I am getting things done!?!
This month has been like a game of Cat and mouse (at the moment it feels like the mouse is winning!)
Suki. The portable Therapist sounds interesting, but putting myself first has always been a problem for me.I understand too about the" well thought out plan" I don't think I made a strong one either.
Getting near the end of your paperwork thats great! maybe like me you are looking forward to January gives you something to focus on.

Gator. Love that name. :welcome:
Join us in the arena although our swords are a bit blunt at the moment I am sharpening mine for January 2008.
Since being here I have had many days AF , if I continued the way I was, I would have had none,so much support is here so join us!

Sweetpea. My plan for MOD is not working and like you I must do another 30 days at least! I was not ready or responsible enough to be let of the leash!

Teardrop. Panto sounds great, I miss not having young uns around anymore. I hope you enjoy it.
I don't think I have lost any weight ,wish I could, but I have noticed since listening to the CDs I have a feeling of nausia the next morning if I drink, something I have never suffered with prior. Maybe physically we are changing our tolerance?
I was not thinking straight last night so I should not have posted. It did stop me drinking further though, so in a way ,it worked just logging on and writing!!!!

Eastx :h :h :h

[Eastender]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Oh and Suki,
I will have to think about your Avatar.....
I decided to change mine every month depending how I felt, Little urchin lost in the streets is how I feel at the moment!
That running figure must be how you felt when you choose it, So maybe something a bit more calming for you....... Can't wait to see what it will be!

Eastx

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

eastender

I am very concerned for you and want you to know that we are all there for you. This time of year is the pits but be very assured we are all there for you and send you very positive vibes. LOL and LOL will pm you as soon as I get the time

:h :l Sweetpea xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[MissCheryl]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

A Quick "Hello"

Hello everyone....

Sorry I have been "MIA" for so long... I have been checking in and reading posts when I can. This time of year is just so crazy... as I know it is for all of you too!

I am off to CA tomorrow to join the family for Christmas. Probably won't have too many chances to check MWO so just wanted to say "MERRY CHRISTMAS"!!!.

I have not been doing well at moderating, let alone abstaining.... this trip will either help me out... or KILL me! :H

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy a wonderful Christmas holiday. I will check back with you either right before the New Year or right after.

I'm thinking of all of you all of the time...hang in there!!

Ho Ho Ho!!
Cheryl

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

A quick hello to everyone

Everyone seems to be so busy at the moment me included but wanted to say hello and that I am thinking of you all.

Cheryl have a fab Xmas and hang on in there yourself. We will give :alf: a good beating once the festive season is over


Eastender how are you doing? :h All the stress of having the work done on the house is bad at any time of year let alone Xmas. Every time you clear up it is as bad 5 mins later because of the work that is going on. Hang on in there we are there for you. As for the drink it is so very hard not only because of Xmas but because of the stress of everything which compounds the problem. Think of the Af days you have had and the AF days to come - you will get there xx

Gator how are you? Let us know as we said before you will get loads of support on the site

Suki thought of a new avatar yet? Yep as you so rightly say this has been a training ground for January when we will really get stuck into going AF again - you did 15 days which was FANTASTIC SO ON WARDS AND UP WARDS

Teardrop know the feeling about not being able to handle as much drink after losing weight. Seem to have had the same problem myself it is a vicious circle because the weight lose is to help my self esteem but it doesn't help when you are drinking the same amounts that normally wouldn't have such an impact and get you legless

Still January here we come. Hope everyone else is OK. Keep posting. I will try and send a post most days but there will be days that I am away from a computer. So if you don't hear from me know that I will be thinking of you and will post as soon as I can

LOL EVERYONE Sweetpea xxxxxxxxxxxx :l

[rustop61]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi everyone

Just wanted to say a quick hello. As you said Sweetpea its that time of year when real family take over from our virtual one. I will miss my mornings in front of the pc sharing with all of you. I will try and check in and out whenever I can but will have to fight for pc time with two teenagers in the house!!

However January here we come indeed. Have a great xmas and new years.

Rustop

[Suki411]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Just was n the middle of writing a post, when one of my cats ran across the keyboard and deleted it.

Will have to be short, since it's getting late.

MissC have a great time in California!

New avatar? Not yet, the only one I can think of is a picture of my real estate agent standing in the unemployment line because he lost his job for losing the lawsuit. :H
OH JOY! Got all the court papers yesterday, shouldnt have read them. Shouldn't wish anyone ill, but he and AL are on the same level.

Three good friends at work quit yesterday :upset: more to come after January 1 (after we get our 2007 profit sharing).

Lots of work today and friday, then off until wednesday the 26th. Don't want to do anything, go anywhere, but stay here and organize. Not depression, but the first step in getting ready for 2008. Want to start fresh.

East, I know what it's like to have a house filled with dust, clutter, etc. Not fun. In the past I would look at the mess, pour a drink and go into the bedroom to read, watch tv, get on the computer.

A friend once wrote.........No you can not possibly come in today, the gate is closed, the house is not in order.

I want my house in order.

Sweet, can't wait until the beginning of the New Year to all gang up on :alf: and beat him to a pulp.

Can't wait until 2008. Hope all of the Firecrackers had a great holiday.

Suki xxx