FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

[Guest]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

I am here Sweatpea. Looking forward to an AF January!

How are things going for you today?

[Suki411]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Sweetpea, I wish I was online this morning when your were. Hope all is ok.

S xxx

[flutterby]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi Sweetpea,
We should think about sharing the responsibility of summarizing this thread so you can take an occasional break? Hope all is well.
We love you,
xox
Fby

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

I FAILED YESTERDAY

Morning Everyone :upset: I am very sorry to report that I failed miserably yesterday and feel very upset with myself. My brain had not gone into AF mode one bit and I feel so miserable that I let myself and everyone else down. How could I have done it!!! SO TODAY I AM STARTING AGAIN - I will draw a line under it because if I sit here upset with myself thinking about it I am likely to fail again today so I must turn my thoughts to how good I am going to be I WILL DO IT I WILL DO IT

fjones 12 days is fantastic. It has made me determined to be good today so thanks for spuring me on

Eastender, Cindi, Fby, Suki and Rosalind thanks for being there for me xx I was really upset yesterday so it meant a lot to me

:h :l Sweetpea xx

[Suki411]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Sweetpea, dear one, you weren't alone yesterday. I was so down, that on my way home bought a bottle of red wine. I usually would drink white. Drank the whole bottle. Didn't enjoy it, woke up periodically during the night and it made me more upset, knowing that i had opened it and guzzled it down.

I know how easy it is to get upset and feel like we failed, but that's what Al wants. Let's booth kick the sorry butt of :alf: and start fresh today. We can do it and there are lots of Firecrackers who can help us. Going to make a cup of "tension tamer" herbal tea, feed the cats and get back on MRO to get inspired.

Will be thinking of you today. :h :h
love, s

[rustop61]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Sweetpea

Dont be upset, today is another day. Sometimes we put too much pressure on ourselves and then beat ourselves up when we dont achieve the higher goal. I am finding it helps to take it in smaller steps. Yes I would love to achieve 30 days AF in January but I am taking it ODAT. Each day I tell myself that just for today I wont drink. When I started in September I obsessed with 30 days and then 60 etc. and was so so disappointed when I messed up. All those days AF mount up and eventually we will get there. The important thing is not to give up, we are all in this together.

Hi to everyone else. Welcome back Flutterby, hope you enjoyed the skiing.

Rustop

[sparky77]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

count me in

[Suki411]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Sparky77, glad your joining us today. I need all the support I can get.

Rustop, you're right. thanks for the advice. Baby steps, baby steps.

[Cinders]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Sweetpea and Suki,

Just wanted to jump in and agree with Suki, here. You simply MUST NOT beat yourselves up about drinking. It serves absolutely no good purpose except perhaps to make you feel bad enough about yourself to keep slipping.

I am a master at slipping and beating myself up and have learned from it. Try to learn from my past mistakes.

Since Nov, I have been AF except for a few, and I mean a very few, major blips. Those blips were spectacular, yes, but heaven's sakes, prior to coming to MWO in May (I think) of last year, I was drinking 1-2 sometimes 3 bottles of wine a night!!

I have had so many AF days this year it is amazing. (Which is why my blips are so spectular, don't have the resistance to AL I used to, get drunk really fast now.)

I am truly on my way to being AF and I do tell myself drinking is NOT an option for me. I know this. However, I hate to say this but if I do mess up, I WILL NOT BEAT MYSELF UP, I will quite simply GET RIGHT BACK ON THE AF TRAIN.

Okay??

Please all Firecrackers, take care, have a wonderful day and I hope we all make our goal of AF today.

Love,
Cindi

[flutterby]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi everyone,
Sweetpea, we've all been there and now we are back here trying to figure out how we can improve our approach so next time the landing won't be so bumpy. It would be nice to stay grounded for a while however, since we are currently hard-wired into the beast, we will remain in our respective holding patterns until we unplug from :alf: and plug into ourselves.
It is important to note, as RU said, that it helps to have ODAT expectations for your long-term goals. When I first posted to MWO I had to do it OHAT. I checked in every hour for the first day -- it was like giving birth-- as a matter of fact, someone encouraged me to "keep pushing". Anyway, it worked! I've had several AF stretches since and that's enough for me to know that I CAN DO THIS. In the meantime, I am working hard on re-wiring. Right now one wire is still connected to the beast, one is in the process of being soldered into my heart (I decided not to connect it to my brain because last time I did that it short-circuited :-) The third wire is the ground and it will be secured when I disconnect from the beast. We all have the blueprints for how to do this.... supps, EXERCISE, attitude/behavior adjustment, faith, support (Thank-you MWO), possibly meds, etc... and eventually we will be able to bring it all together with enough energy to yank that wire out of the beast and watch IT shrink into a powerless pile of :xxx: crap. Then we will sweep it into the trash and throw it out where it belongs.
Thats my plan and I'm sticking to it.
Let's do it together. I'm SURE it will help.
:happyheart: Love you guys...
xox
Fby

[Cinders]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Flutterby,

Well said!!

Love,
Cindi

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH

:h :l I really needed those kind words of support thank you all very much I know I will get there with your support. I really am a NEWBIE in many ways because I really thought that with having 30 days AF that I could mod straight away BUT NO

I have put myself under far too much pressure which had the opposite effect yesterday. This is a very steep learning curve and I now know one hour at a time or one day at a time is the way forward. I think if I had started an AF stretch at any other time of the year my fall would not have been so spectacular. So ODAT is now for me with a hesitant I would like 30 days please without the beast knocking on the door.

Suki we are in this together as day 1 and you are right there are so many firecrackers there to help us xxxxx

Rustop I am picking myself up and dusting myself down ODAT - you are so right about putting myself under pressure

Sparky glad to have you on board

Cindi I am on that train right now thank you so much

Fby like your plan I shall undertake the re wiring and try to get on as much as I can

Teardrop thanks for the chat it was greatly appreciated when you had such little time before going to work xx

Hi East and everyone else hope you are all having a good day

:l :h Sweetpea xxxxxx

[Eastender]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi Sweetpea and all the firecrackers,
On tricky day 3 today feeling Ok but fighting the temptation.
Worst days were 4 and 5 on my last attempt at 30AF.

Back at Work with piles of paperwork to get through from the holidays.
Good though is keeping me busy.

Got the teashirt over Chrismas/ New year on disappointment in myself, so know that beating yourself up does no good. So Sweetpea, sending you positive vibes- look forward not back. The future you can change.

Suki. Same for you, Look forward, we can all pull one another along, and give a lift when we need it ,so come on, grab my hand!

Great Idea FBY, Love the wiring picture, although feel like my fuse has blown recently!

Hope everything Ok with you Teardrop?

Eastx

[lukalee]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

We can do this!! Sweetpea and Suki, I am here holding your hand.

[rudemama]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

I think it is important to come here for support support for meeting or goals or support when those goals elude you. I was af for 60 days last spring I thought I could moderate but have since gone back to my crazy drinking patterns. I didn't post much when I was moderating. I know I can not moderate. I will post regularly now I need the support. I will not drink today. I will be here tomorrow and maybe later today, thank you all rudemama