FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

[evergreen]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hey all,
Been away from the computer for a while and only have time for a quick post!!!
Just finished Day 12 - cautiously optimistic that I will make it 30 days!!! When I get too optimistic in the past I have slipped.
MissCheryl - I can SO relate. That has been me so many times! In my neighborhood they call it Drunko. The really cool thing though is that you are taking the experience and learning from it. Trust that you are exactly where you are supposed to be. Without the slip you may not have realized completely that you cannot moderate at least not now.
Suki - Welcome. Same thing. This is a process. Being perfect is boring. What is really important is coming here and recommitting after slipping. I have been a member since May or so and this is my longest stretch. ( I by no means advocate being such a SLOW learner)
Rustop - HI I can relate to the busyness. I am SO late!!
Sweetpea - Love you bunches for getting us started.
Teardrop - Here's a hug and hope you feel better!!!!

Way to go all Fireworkers and ODATers!!

Evergreen

[flutterby]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi Fireworkers,
I'm going out in the field (work related) for a few days and will not have computer access. Here's a big hug for everyone. Keep up the good vibes!!! We are in the right place. Talk to you when I get back.
xox
Fby

[Eastender]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi Everyone,
Glad to see everyone doing so well!
Just to check in after Sweetpea asked how we were all doing (only just read it) in an earlier post. I am today on my 15th day AF.
Half way already!
Still have not recieved my book dissappointed but read here to keep me going...
Thank you all for your support.
I would have still been drinking if I had not come across this site it is truly inspirational.

[Leebo]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

MissCheryl,

Don't be too hard on yourself. I had a challenging weekend also.. away with my sisters and mom.. did well Thursday, Friday, until Saturday.. shopping and then lunch sitting out at the City Market by the waterfront.. the time when you want to be able to enjoy a drink. I did drink a couple of beers with lunch and then did drink a few more when we got back to my sister's.. did not really over do it, but I was not happy with myself for messing up my 30 days. However, I have not had a drink since - not really wanted one - so I feel I am progressing to controlling my drinking and like you I am still committed to making November the most AF I have had in years!! The important thing is - you are back on track!!

And congratulations to everyone else.. it sounds like everyone is doing wonderful.
We can do this... keep up the good work everyone.. thanks - to each and every one of you..

Leebo

[happydog]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi everyone,
Today i'm going to give my body a rest, i've got a big cold sore on my lip now( dont like looking at myself in the mirror at the moment.) If my work rings for me to cover for someone i'm just going to say NO for once. I was meant to go councelling today but just dont have the energy to get up and go. Going to make myself some ready brek now.
Day12 AF( now that makes me feel good.)
Hope everyone has a good day
Love
Teardrop.x

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi everyone

10 days AF cannot believe that I have got this far. Still feeling the urge for a drink but not nearly so bad and it is not on my mind the whole time

Teardrop well done on 12 days take care and let your body have the rest. You must be run down to have a cold sore and sore throat. Plenty of TLC is the order of the day. Having a painful past to deal with makes everything so much more difficult when you are at a low ebb but you are doing really well at the moment to have 12 days under your belt. Try and rearrange with your councellor when you are better. Get well soon and carry on the good work

Leebo at least you did not overdo it well done ODAT You are back on track now so go for it

Eastender 15 days how fab hope to be in the same boat in 5 days. Well done

Hi Flutterby look forward to hearing from you when you get back

Evergreen what a supportive post thanks for your support to us all and most importantly well done on your 12 days

Suki well done on picking yourself up and starting again. We are all behind you. Keep heart and go for an AF day

Cheryl how are you doing?

Got a busy week this week so have not had the time I would like to devote to my MWO pals

Thankyou for being there for me and for each other

How is everyone else doing that we have heard from in a while?

:wave: Keep :h everyone we are all in this together Sweetpea xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

____________________________________________

**********Days AF

[finski]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi you all

Hello.
Missed a few days again due to silly work.. But never mind.

For those of you who had a little hick up on the way, don't be too hard on yourselves. The main thing is that you're back on and making an effort. You're doing fine.

And for all of you, well done. I'm sure we all have our moments of weakness, but keep focused and it'll all be okay in the end.

I am now on day 16 af.. how cool's that. The last time i've been off booze the long must be about 7 years ago now. Feel pretty proud of myself at the moment. But i have to admit the glass of wine has crossed my mind a fair few times. But i have been able to control my urges whilst in the shop, just not even looked at the bottles. So, so far so good. I'm confident i can manage the full 30 days, but i have a party to go to on the 1st of december, so will be interesting what the wine does to me...

I'm seriously thinking of limiting my drinking to twice a month if i can manage it.. but if it seems too difficult, will do another 30 days to think about it.

I wish you all strenght to carry on with this. I will pop in to see who's posted during the weekend at some point. Until then.

Best wishes,
Finski :l

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

:h Hi Everyone

11 days AF and keeping strong so far

Went into a pub today and for the first time ordered a soft drink. I was amazed at myself for being so strong. Couldn't have done it without your support though Thanks sooooooooo much all of you

Nice to hear from you Finski you seem to have been working really hard. Excellent news on 16 days Af Well done

I hope to moderate over December and am thinking of setting some realistic goals regarding level of consumption and the amount of AF days to aim for during the festive period. I also thought of putting a catchphrase together to help us all through what will be a very tricky time, so that maybe we can run it through our minds every time we feel that we should stop now. Sounds crazy but every little idea I can think of to help myself I shall explore. All ideas welcome if any one else wants to join in.

Take good care everyone

:lol3: Sweetpea

____________________

*********** AF Days

[MissCheryl]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Taking things a moment at a time...

Hi all....

Been oh so busy!! But, wanted to stop in and say "hey"!

Last night I really wanted some Chardonnay - gosh, I really miss it sometimes. And, I really HATE that I miss it!!! Had some grocery shopping to do so, instead of wine, at the store I got a LARGE coffee with hazelnut and cream at Starbucks and sipped it while I shopped - yummy. I think I've found a new addiction. Don't know what it is... just having something in my hand? Or, the strong taste completely takes over and helps me stop imagining how good a glass of wine would taste? I'm sure it can't be good to trade one addiction for another, but for now it's sometimes what gets me through the night without the wine. Although I didn't get much sleep last night!! Definately go all decaf next time!!

Another thing I'm going to try this evening... I found this Cosmopolitan mix on my shopping trip last weekend. You can make it "virgin" with club soda. I have it chilling and I'm going to mix it up with ice and put it in a frosty martini glass in a minute. Do you think this is a good or bad thing to do? It's kinda fun and it's non-alcoholic. But, is it bad to still be trying to "have a drink"?

Already fretting about this weekend. My husband and son will be away for the weekend. They have my favorite Snow Crab Legs on sale at the store and one of my favorite treats is a big 'ol pile of crab legs and a big 'ol glass (bottle) of wine.... I'm already feeling tempted. Trying to stay strong...

Hope you're all doing well... I hope to check back in again soon and hear how everyone is doing... I'm so impressed with all of you! Whether it's Day 14 AF or Day 1 for ya - keep it up!!

:l Cheryl

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi Cheryl

Lovely to hear from you

I haven't drank coffee for years. My routine has been tea in the morning 4/5 cups, diet coke until I started on the wine which used to be 6.0 in the evening but had become sooner and sooner till I realised I was out of control and went from 1/2 bottle to 2 a night.

So when I went Af I needed to change my routine and I think that is a big key in beating the beast. I know I will have set backs and I am mentally preparing myself for when that happens as I am sure it will so ODAT. So I decided to try the coffee mid morning to make that change in the routine. Quite enjoy it now and as you say the strong taste takes your mind off the track of wanting wine.

I have also been recommened Red Bull as a drink to place in my daily routine. Haven't as yet tried it but I am up for any suggestions.

Life in general is all about having a reason to get out of bed, having routines and goals in life. Without having goals is like being in a boat without a rudder. You aimlessly drift along without purpose and desire to do anything but stay where you are and not taking responsibilty for anything or anybody not even yourself. This 30 day AF stint is certainly keeping focused at the moment and made me realise that I have hurt a lot of people out there but the person I have hurt the most is myself because I have to live with myself 24/7.

So onwards and upwards with positive thoughts in my mind.

What was in the Cosmopolitan mix? And NO it is definitely not a bad thing "trying to have a drink". If you think about it we all started out drinking because it was fun, sociable and something we really enjoyed. All you are doing now is mirroring that feeling but without the destructive addictive booze.

Stay strong Cheryl you are an inspiration to all of us :l

Hope everyone else is doing well and if you are not it is more of a reason to let us know how you are doing so we can support you.

:groupluv: Sweetpea xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

____________________________________

************ AF Days

[rustop61]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi everyone

Great to catch up on everyone's news. I dont think a virgin cosmo is a bad idea Chryl. I have found that the AF beer has stopped me having a glass of wine a few times so whatever gets you through it. Sometimes its habit and I find it especially hard at week-ends when hubby is there with his glass of wine (he does not have a problem), it helps to sip on something.

I did have cravings last night but luckily I fell asleep on the couch and by the time I woke up it was time for bed so I did nothing about them.

Have had a hectic few days taking my cousin to the hospital for chemo etc and looking after her as well as the kids but at least I am doing it with a clear head.

Have a great week-end everyone

Rustop

[happydog]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi everyone,
Hope you are all doing well, still keep on posting even if you have started again.
was not here y'day.
Sweetpea thanks- you are so thoughtful and caringperson, it soo nice you remember everyone and know about them. my body has been rundown also got a bit of infection in the water works but on tables and are working relief, REally need to drink lots of water. Dont think nothing else can go wrong with me.
14day AF That does make me feel good inside me.
Sweetpea- i only have red bull if i really need it like for energy if it is really low. would not replace it as a regular drink. ( not that good)
Cheryl- well done on your af days, i might try the coffee in the evening but just one to see if it works.
Finski well done to you and so you should be proud of yourself.

moment of weakness when i go shopping and the person next to me has a bottle in there basket.( i do hate that.)
The other day coming home with my son in the car driving past the off licence i slowed down b'cause of the car in front, but straight away my son said dont mum. i realize what he mean. ( i really hate myself knowing how much iwas drinking in front of them) i dont think they will ever get.
Tonight i'm making sure i take my daughter and son out to the cinmema.
Wishing everyone a good af weekend.
Love you all.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Teardrop.x

[happydog]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Hi rustop61,
I'm so slow at typing. sorry to hear about your cousin.
I like the feeling when you fuul asleep on the couch i done that a few times and go straight to bed afterwards. But it is good to have that clear head. Rustop61 make sure you get enough rest yourself ok.
Take care.x
Teardrop

[Suki411]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

Sweetpea

Good morning Sweetpea. Just counted your stars/days. I'm so impressed and jealous. Should have checked back daily, since I opened that bottle of vodka, that you congratulated me for not opening.

I know I haven't posted for a few days, nor have I read any of all of the posts over the last several days. And I apologize for that. Denial/avoidance, whatever. Now that i am back on this thread, I look forward to reading about all of you! And being inspired by your posts.

Afraid that this might be one of my long posts (sorry, everyone). But I need to vent.

Here I go again with my boothstars.com horoscope but...

Thought for the Day
Friday, November 16, 2007
Mercury?s recent retrograde journey through Scorpio is likely to have brought up some disturbing realizations concerning certain people in your life. With Mercury now back to forward motion, there is a chance to come to terms with your conclusions.

Virgo (Aug. 23 ? Sept. 22)
Friday, November 16, 2007
Though difficult, urgent decisions now need to be made, and though you?re struggling to reconcile a host of seemingly incompatible factors, the essence of your current challenge is simpler than you realize. It needn?t be as complicated as it?s become.

One thing I have learned from all from all of you is that it's not good, but it's ok to slip if you realize why you are doing it and learn from it. I'm not beating my self up for the last couple of days, I'm not thinking of myself as a loser (I've got my sister to remind me of that!) I'm finally thinking about why I drink the way I do and what I can do to prevent it from happening again

I am a middle child, older brother who was treated as the second coming of Christ, first born, first son, perfect in every way. My younger sister was also perfect, married the perfect husband, had two perfect girls (never worked a day after getting married, neither did my horrible s-i-l).

I was the misfit, the tomboy, always getting into trouble for giving bloody noses, black eyes, etc.)

But, I was always the one my parents called upon to help (because I was single, who knows), after my grandmother had a stroke, my dad came down with Alzheimers (after he became partially paralyzed due to guillian barre syndome) and my mother needed help with her emphysema, I was the one to spend my time with them. Didn't bother me, because I loved them all, loved spending time with them and learned a lot from them. .

After Mom passed away two years ago, I discovered that she named my executrix. Which meant that I had to deal with my brother, who abused me as a child, with my sister who refused to believe me, when I told her about my brother's abuse. While working 50-60 hours a week at a job that I know I losing next August or sooner, because the company is moving jobs to India and out of state to save money, trying to clean out her house by myself, for the last two years I have been dealing with my sister and brother with their hands out, but doing nothing to help me.

My mom and dad had bought a small place at the cape years ago. My brother was never allowed to go there. My sister and her family went down there at least 6-8 times a year, while I was taking care of dad, grandmother, mother. Kept saying to my sister, just stop in for 5 minutes with your kids on your way down or your way back home to say hi to mom, she'd explain that it would be too hard for her.

Could never figure that out.

The minute my mother died, my sister said that she wanted to sell the place at the cape, she wanted the money. I said no. It's my turn to enjoy, like she and her husband and family has for the past 20 years. My mom paid for it all, they never paid a penny, but for the last 2 years, I've been paying the expenses (not much really), but when I said that we need to do things like make new curtains, etc., in order to rent it out to recoup some of the expenses, all she says is how much is this going to cost me.

Now that things are almost settled (although have had many problems with the first lawyer, IRS, check bouncing on the sale of my Moms condo, the real estate agents, friends of my Mom's suing me. my brother and sister with their handsout, etc.) I am finally coming to terms with who I am, why I've been drinking, why I need to stop.

I know that my depression is linked to my drinking (proven by being AF for 4 days and being the happiest I've been in years). I know that I drink because I am depressed and to avoid thinking/acting.I know that I have wasted so much time drinking. It's been a painful process, however, my grandmother Mimi, an independent Swede/Norwegian, always taught me, never regret what you have done, only regret what you have not done.

The best thing in my life has been discovering this thread, you Sweetpea and everyone else here. After slipping last week, waking up in the middle of the night, finding a half finished drink on my bedside table and getting excited about drinking it, I know what I need to do now.

I know who I am now. I know that for the first time in years, that I come first and it's ok. It's a bit scary, to spend so much time taking care of other people and now I come first. Such guilt.

Thank you all for being such an important part of my life and such an important part figuring out who I am.

I know that I would never have reached this place in my life without all of you. I feel stronger and more self-assured about myself than I have in years.

Hugs to all pf you!

[sweetpea]

FIREWORKS - ANYONE WANT TO JOIN ME FOR 30 DAYS AF

:h Suki

My God all the things you have been through. Your a bloody saint to have put up with it all especially that low life of a brother. Verrrrrrrrrry sorry about the language but I was gob smacked by your post. Do not under any circumstances think of either your brother or sister as being perfect - Hell - your brother abused you PERFECT HE IS NOT - and your sister gave you no support and from where I am sitting she has an attitude of ME ME ME

YOU ARE SO SO MUCH BETTER THAN EITHER OF THEM WILL EVER BE TRUST ME

I am so glad that you are finding some peace in your life and begining to come to terms with who you are. Depression and drinking go hand in hand and you have had so much to deal with. Keep posting even when you have had a slip - Nobody but nobody on this site will ever judge you. All of us have fallen into this drinking pattern for one reason or another and didn't realise there was a problem until it was too late. - Like not remembering who you spoke to the night before - Like waking up in the morning and not remembering past a certain time the day before - forgetting what arrangements you have made with people - Everyone drinks and until the :alf: gets a really good hold of you do you start questioning yourself and start thinking THIS HAS GOT TO STOP

Count each AF day as a victory - Keep strong but above all keep posting. Write any feelings of guilt onto a piece of paper, tear it up and set light to it because from now on the feelings of happiness after 4 AF days is what counts :

Teardrop cranberry juice is really good for waterwork problems. Sorry you are so run down and feeling poorly but on a very positive note you are doing really, really well with 14 AF days - FANTASTIC. It is sad when the kids pass comment especially when you are being so good. I remember a couple of months ago my daughter passed comment about what I had to drink one morning when I went into the fits of laughter. That really really hurt because I had not actually had a drop I was just enjoying a moment in time with the family - Sad - but things will get better once they realise we are trying to get our act together and the comments will stop. Thanks for the advice on the red bull. I will do as you say and just keep it as a stand by to boost my energy levels

Rustop so sorry that your cousin is not well but as you say your helping and with a clear head. Your support will be greatly appreciated because you are such a caring person

Take good care everyone

Lots of love Sweetpea:armsaround: