New and not sure!

[fly high]

Hi everyone,
I am new to the forum and in a bit of a rut these days. I recently split from my son's father of 4 years. Not sure if drinking had anything to do with iT (he never said), but I really want to get over this. Since the split I have found myself drinking more heavily(about a bottle of wine a day sometimes more). I usually drink alone out of boredom or sheer sadness. I know this only perpetuates the cycle, but I can't seem to not do it. I have not let it interfere with taking care of my son, but I feel like crap most mornings when I have to get up to take care of him.
I want to think I still have ontrol, but when the urge hits, I drink, and then I cry for all the things I gave up to make a family for my ex. We talk, but there is never any sign that we will get back together so I drink even more.
I know that I need to be healthy for my son, but I don't know how to start the process.
My friends drink socially, and I want to be able to as well, any suggestions?

[changemylife]

New and not sure!

You need to break the cycle and stop for at least 30 days or more. The longer the better. After you kick the physical part, set some rules for yourself.

Number one rule is not to drink alone at home.

It's not easy, been struggling for a while

[fly high]

New and not sure!

I can try that. Will the physical part be hard?

[Mags]

New and not sure!

:welcome:

Nice to meet you fly high. Sounds like you are going through a rough time with lots of changes in your life - always a good trigger for the drinking.

We can help and will be more than happy to - but remember, you have got to put some work into this also.

First thing - read the boards here. Read all over the place. There are so many experiences and so much good advice on this site. Read what is here for you.

Next, if you want to stop drinking, then stay here and keep posting, but most of all, get serious about it. You do need to go alcohol free (AF) for a while to get your body back in balance. Please go the the store (or whatever it's called) and downlad RJ's book. It only costs about $15 and is very helpful in explaining how you go about stopping drinking.

We are all here to help anytime. There is always someone here. Post whenever you need to.

[meditation mama]

New and not sure!

Welcome, Fly High!

As Mags said, we are here to offer support. We have all been where you are and can be very helpful. Remember to ask tons of questions of everyone here. Yo can also download the book from this site. Remember to get some supplements. It is important to be kind to your body and mind in the begining.

All the best. You can do this!

Namaste,

MM

[Guest]

New and not sure!

Hi fly high and welcome.
I`m sorry you`re so sad. The break up has been hard on you and it`s only natural that you`re trying to drink away the sadness, but as you already realize, it doesn`t work like that. Try to see breaking up as having opened up a lot of opportunities to you........as you say, you gave up a lot for your man. I have drank my way through a break up and, to be honest, the drink can`t heal a broken heart..........only time can do that.

You and your son deserve a whole lot more out of life..........you won`t find that "more" in a wine bottle. Make a commitment to 30 AF days and see where you want to go from there. It`s not easy to give up drinking when it offers us some sort of release, but you`ll find a wealth of support here.

Wishing you love and strength,

Starlight Impress x

[The Londoner]

New and not sure!

Sorry you are sad

Fly High
Welcome. Great advice has been sent your way. You have found a safe place here at MWO and a truly supportive community.
Visit often and take good care of yourself.
Anna :h