I'm trying again

[adaptable]

I haven't been here in a while. I stated taking Topa again about a week ago and have cut down my drinking quite a bit. Even gone a few days this week AF and had only a few drinks the other days.

I'm so sick of the way I've been the last few months. Drinking beer every night until I pass out. There has been so much stress in my life and so many disappointments and I'm so tired of it all. I need to totally change the way I do things from day to day.

I've been coming here reading posts and that has helped me so much get my head straight. I've just not felt like posting because I've felt so over whelmed with my life. It's getting a bit easier now to cope from day to day. I just need to stay on track and stop drinking so much.

I'm going for moderation to begin with because my hubby and I are going to Rome in December and I know we'll want to drink. But until then, I'm going to drink very little and use this site to help me heal.

Thank you all for being here, sharing your stories and your struggles. It really helps knowing I'm not alone. My hubby sure does not understand me and I can not talk to him about my drinking nor my feelings. He loves me, but he doesn't understand me.

[wonderworld]

I'm trying again

Hi adaptable!

No, you are definitely not alone. I hear the stress in your 'voice' and feel for you, truly. Sounds like you've found MWO at just the right time - me too! Such a relief, eh?

Look forward to hearing more about you -

wonder xx

[universal]

I'm trying again

Hi adaptable - glad to see you're trying again. I too have a lot of stress in my life and it makes it difficult to go AF sometimes. I have a great job that I love but it can be very stressful and I don't always agree with my boss - I am not one to take things lying down either which can often create some challenges at work which of course is always easier to deal with after a couple of beers or some wine...........I haven't started my meds or supps yet (still waiting to get them) and have done okay at moderating but only had one AF day this week (total of 4 this month - really hoping to up that number dramatically).
Glad to see you're using the boards, they have really been helpful for me the past week since I joined. It's great to know we're not alone and to have support from people who are not judgemental - this I think is the most important thing.

My boyfriend is wonderful but he is also not aware of how much I drink - since we don't live together I'm pretty good at hiding it from him. I wish I could get his support but I'm not sure I'm ready to go there yet. So for now I will continue to try to get more AF days and moderate when I do choose to drink.

Keep us posted on your progress!

[Victory]

I'm trying again

This is a great site hope it helps you

Dear Adaptable, good luck with the moderation because I know by experience that when we have an alcohol problem its best to go AF. Moderation during the last 4 years is impossible for me as I am, a drink to you drop gal and really ashamed of it. Not sure if the moderators are fooling themselves or not??? Apologies to the moderators if it works for you then blessings to you. Adaptable I seriously suspect if you drink til you pass out [like me] then AF is the only way to go. But don?t listen to me, if I knew it all I wouldn?t be on this site. I do wish you every success and the Italian holiday sounds just great. Sigh ????
This site is great for being able to express yourself so if hubby doesn?t understand we will. Cheers and best wishes. Keep us posted please.
:welcome:

[adaptable]

I'm trying again

wonderworld, universal and victory thank you so much for reading and responding to my post. Thanks for the kind words of support and insight. It sure feels great to be here with people who struggle with the same thing.

I drank way too much last night and today I'm going AF. I might be fooling myself thinking that I can. I did well last week, but last night I blew it. My hubby is home today and I know he'll want to kick back and drink some beer this evening and I'm going to try to be strong and say no. I'm in charge. It doesn't feel like it after a few drinks, so I'm not going to have any. Yesterday I was at a memorial and all I could think of was to make sure I didn't loose track of my drink and that my glass was constantly full.

I have started to take vitamins and Topa, I jogged for 2 miles yesterday morning with my dogs and I feel my depression lifting, so things are looking up. I'm more aware and determined to get healthy. I've gotten a name of a councilor for my hubby and me to try to get to the root of our unhealthy habitual behavior. We are drinking buddies, what do we do now?

sorry, I'm writing so much here all about me and none of you know me or why should you even care to know. I'm sure it's all boring, but here goes anyway.