A/F 2

[dreambeliever]

Well that may sound good, but Im no happy :upset: I keep getting to day 2 or 3 and then picking up again. I think my failure feelings are probably from my previous years in aa, where its more expected that youre sober every day.

I must admit its not as bad as before I joined cause Ive got you guys in my head now and am definately not drinking as often or as much.

Ive got the tablets, Ive had my tests done, Ive ordered the book and have stayed away from my ex........

So why do I keep starting again? I dont even want to drink anymore, I dont like the taste, or the effect and am so tired of it. The worst part is the effect on my daughter she absolutly hates me drinking.

This was meant to be a nice positive gud morning to everyone, sorry.............Have a good sunday anyway

[Suzanna]

A/F 2

Welcome Dreambeliever, I think we just have to un-brainwash ourselves after all these years of being told that drinking is fun. We were told this since childhood! Hollywood does it, friends and family gatherings, but like you said, keep coming and reading and after awhile it is going to "take" and we start really being observant of our behaviors instead of them being automatic. Drinking is not fun anymore. You said it, you are more mindful and drinking less. I am experiencing that too, and lots of af days that I did not have before. :goodjob: Suz

[PAMN]

A/F 2

Any day is good if....

Dreambeliever, if you are thinking about it, want to do something about, and are drinking less than before, it counts as a good day. It sure is a better day than just drinking obliviously, right?

[Reenie]

A/F 2

Dreambeliever: Drinking gets old. There comes at time in life when drinking really isn't "Cool". Pardon the slang, I can't think of a better word. I find that you get more respect when you don't drink. Today makes 152 days of AF for me. Family and friends admire me for not drinking. They wonder how I do it, for they would like to stop or moderate themselves. There comes a time in life when you need to respect your body and take care of your health. I'm 42 years old. I spent my 20's and 30's drinking socially and partying it up. I had many fun years socializing and drinking, until it became a problem for me (sloppy behavior, drinking alone, throwing up, wasting my weekends away, accidentally hurting myself (falling 2x's with splitting my chin and tearing my ear), did I say, "I've had enough. It's time to grow up and take responsibility for my actions and well being".

If you really want to change your life. Take one day at a time. Small slip ups will lead to major successes as long as you keep trying. Good luck. -Reenie

[Eastender]

A/F 2

Dreambeliever; You keep starting again because you want to do it, Just getting your head round it can be the main problem, But as you say we are in your head as well so you have reinforcements for your battle. Keep going.

Reenie,
Feel the same at past 50! Thats so great you got to 152 days WOW

[Doggygirl]

A/F 2

Hi Dream. I know exactly how you feel. I've come to hate drinking too, even though it's been a struggle to give it up. Have you tried the hypnosis CD's? Those seem to help me keep a more positive frame of miind. (and this is a reminder to myself to get better about using them daily!)

Reenie, congratulations on your 152 days!! That is terrific. Your message here is very inspirational to me, and I'm sure to many others also!

DG

[Chief]

A/F 2

There comes a point where drinking becomes work. It takes up a lot of time, traveling to different stores so the clerks won't realise just how much you drink, planning when you can "respectfully" have your first drink of the day, drinking to excess while trying to maintain the charade that you're not, scheduling your entire day around drinking, trying your best to not look either drunk or hungover, cleverly disposing the empties, trying to figure out where that money went.....

So, Dreambeliever, why do you keep starting again?

There comes a point where drinking becomes work.....maybe you're there. Maybe it's time to say "Stop this ride...I want to get off "

Days 3-5 were the hardest for me. I think it's because the alcohol is leaving your system and The Beast is not a happy camper. He is having somewhat of a panic attack because way in the back of his mind he is thinking "Oh my God, this might be it!"

So, in order to stop repeating this process, you have to be extremely strong, focused and downright stubborn during these couple days. You have to make a vow to yourself that no matter what happens, and I mean no matter what, you will not drink.

Once you make it through about day 5, you will start to see a change in the way you think and feel. And then you just keep the same dedication and continue to rack up the AF days.

You can do it. Just don't let The Beast talk you into taking that first drink. It's really ALL about that 1 drink. If you don't have 1, you won't have 20.

Don

[Doggygirl]

A/F 2

Wonderful words as always Chief!!

[Reenie]

A/F 2

Thanks for the congrats Eastender, Doggiegirl and Tkeene. It is so true, drinking for me has lost its appeal. Taking Tkeene's statement into account, my new motto is: "Drinking doesn't work for me anymore". Chief, also so true: "Drinking takes up too much time".

[FinallyRN]

A/F 2

Suzana, I can't believe what you wrote. You just described my mental state perfectly. If I give up drinking I'm not going to have fun anymore. I say the opposite to myself but I don't think I believe it, YET. I guess I'm just being stubborn, holding on to what I don't know, drinking truly isn't fun anymore. Hasn't been for awhile. Maybe I"m going through a mourning period. Well, I better bury the sucker once and for all!

Good thread

[Bashley]

A/F 2

You're right on the money again Don. Howz your battle going?
Hang in there Reenie. Is there somewhere you can go for a week or so to get away from the heeby geebies?
B

[Chief]

A/F 2

Battle's going fine, Bash.... managed to get my hand around The Beast's throat 114 days ago and haven't let go of the bastard since..

Good hearing from you..

Don

[auntiegriselda]

A/F 2

I agree that drinking can be work, but it's also an escape from work or whatever is bothering you. Sometimes I just have too much chatter going on in my head because of a lot of obligations and it's easier to drink a bottle of wine and forget it all. Only trouble is, the next morning it's all back with a vengeance. (And a headache!) So I'm back on day 1 today. Should have been day 2 but I slipped and had one glass last night. This time I'm going to make it!!