back to day one

[stronggirl]

well, I did it again. I was doing so well, almost through day 5, then ended up drinking! what a fool I am. I wasn't even craving, I just did it. I didn't get too drunk and do anything stupid for once. In fact, I barely even got buzzed. now I'm just dissapointed in myself because I have to start all over again. I don't know how to tell anyone cause they've been counting days with me. How do I tell them I',m back to day 1? Any suggestions?

[nancy]

back to day one

Hi Strongirl

I think the philosophy around here is to value the progress you have made rather than thinking you have to start all over again. You are improving and will do even better the next time.

Do you mean you don't want to tell people around here you are starting over? don't worry about that, members do it all the time. As for outside people, I wouldn't tell too many people your day count.

You also might want to try taking it one day at a time. There is a great thread for newbies called Newbies ODAT with the day.

Keep making progress!:goodjob:

[Reenie]

back to day one

Stronggirl:

Great job on making it 4 days AF! Ask yourself, How did I feel during those 4 days? Were the drinks really worth it on the 5th day? How did drinking actually make me feel? Did it actually "better or enhance my life"?

Please don't be hard on yourself, nor feel guilty. The more you learn from your from your slips and or impulses, the stronger you will become to head them off and not want to pick up a drink.

You are making great progress. Day 4 was always a hard day for me. Once I past 7 then 14 it got a little easier. Have a great day. -Reenie

[lucky 2.0]

back to day one

Day 1 is better than Day 0!

[cke123]

back to day one

hi Stronggirl-

Don't be too hard on yourself. Like you said you didnt do anythng stupid, so you have that..Although it may be a small consolation. (it wouldn't be for me) I agree with Nancy about not telling too many people outside of hear your day count. I think it puts added pressure,and we certainly don't need that. We're hard enough on ourselves as it is.

E

[stronggirl]

back to day one

I wasn't going to tell anyone outside of this site that I was even trying until I got some time in but people caught on right away when they saw a coffee in my hand rather than a bottle. you're right on the odat and I will take that approach this time around.

[nancy]

back to day one

Hi Strongirl

If people ask you, those who are close to you I mean and know you wouldn't be drinking a coffee, you could tell them you are cutting down, not quitting forever with a running day count!

[stronggirl]

back to day one

thanks Nancy. It's mostly one of my housemates. She's watching me like a hawk now. not to be a nag but because she knows how bad my problem is. she has seen me in many blackouts and she really cares about me. How can I tell her nicely to lay off? She also knows my boyfriend is really sick himself and I shouldn't be around him while I'm trying to be AF. She's probally right cause I was with him last night when I drank. I make my own decisions but I made the wrong one I guess. Any suggestions?

[cke123]

back to day one

I understand that feeling. Tell her that while you appreciate her concern, the decision to cut back/quit is yours and yours alone. It wont happen if you are trying to please her.

As for your boyfriend, that is a toughy. Mine drinks too, but not nearly as bad as me. It will be interesting as I get some time under my belt to see how that works out. But again, it has to be about you. Have you told him what you've tried to do?

E

[nancy]

back to day one

Well, part of me thinks this might be good for you to have someone watching if it is not done in a rude or judgemental way. And it sounds like it isn't.

Actually, though, this is her problem. I think maybe if she is that wrapped up in what you are doing she might need some help herself, like Alanon. You can't control someone else's drinking. Now, I suppose if it is your spouse you have a right to some control and you have a huge stake in what that alcoholic is doing. But as a housemate, I don't know, I think she needs to offer advice and her opinions as she can but then leave it up to you to get help and she has to let go. It's your problem and it sounds like she is getting enmeshed in it.

AS for you, I would just not make her any promises like you are quitting because she might get disappointed.

Not sure if this is good advice maybe some of the other members can help with this.